Today, my sister asked me if she could go into my closet to borrow my favourite dress for a party she was going to tonight. When I asked her where she was going, she said to a Halloween costume party. My sister is going as a prostitute. FML

Today, my sister asked if she could look through my closet to find something to wear. She is 6 months pregnant. FML

Today, I spent over $160 and 2 hours preparing for a Halloween party I was throwing. The only person who showed up was my sister, who helped me decorate. FML

Today, my sister confessed that when she runs out of clean underwear, she uses mine. That wouldn't be so bad if she didn't also put it back in my dresser afterwards so I wouldn't notice. FML

Today, my 3 year old daughter's Halloween costume finally got delivered. FML

Today, I walked in on my little brother dressing up like Billie Eilish, his new favorite singer. He tore up some of my favorite clothes to make the outfits. FML

Today, I bought a Halloween costume for my cat. FML

Today, I was surfing the web for Halloween costumes, and found one labeled "Extreme Girl Nerd". With the wig, the glasses, and the buck-teeth, it looked exactly like me. FML

Magic is real, OK?

Today, my little sister received a fairy costume from my aunt. She put it on and waved her wand at me. She said, "Abracadabra, bibbity poo. I wish Sydney was pretty." When I did nothing, she put her hands on her hips and said, "Can't you just act pretty?" FML

Today, my sister surprised me by cleaning my room and doing my laundry. She found my journal, condoms and vibrator and decided to share her findings with my family. Oh yes... she also shrunk half my wardrobe. FML