Today, my school's 6'2, 270-pound, 375-pound bench-pressing football superstar knocked me unconscious in one hit. With a dodgeball. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, we were playing dodgeball at school. I tried to duck and jump around so the idiots on the other team couldn't nail me with the ball. Mid-jump, it tore through the air and smashed straight into my ballsack, sending me curling into a fetal position on the floor. I feel like I got sterilized. FML
Today, at football practice, the biggest lineman shouldered me so hard in the groin that my protective cup pushed back with enough force to crack the bone. FML
Today, I was hit in the head with a football during class. Spanish class. FML
Today, I got hit so hard in the head by a dodgeball that a contact popped right out. To make matters worse, I continued to get hit as a futilely searched for it. FML
Today, at football practice, a 200lb lineman ended up landing on my stomach. The weight made me shit myself. My new nickname is "Muddbutt". FML
Today, I got hit in the face at a dodge-ball tournament. My entire mouth was bloody. The sad thing is, I wasn't even playing. FML
Today, against the will of the kids in my class, we played kick ball. The first time I rolled the ball, the tallest, biggest kid kicked it as hard as he could. I caught it though, with my nuts. FML
Today, in class my friend played a joke on me by pulling my seat from under me while i was about to sit. I fell and everybody laughed at me. During the next class, I did the same thing to him. He broke his arm. He was the star of the basketball team. Nobody laughed. FML
Today, during gym class, my teacher insisted that everyone should relieve some stress by throwing a basketball at the wall. I wound up and hurled the thing at the wall, it bounced back and hit me in the stomach. I began to vomit uncontrollably. Even my teacher laughed. FML
Today, at work I was playing football with one of my camp kids in the indoor-pool. I saw a co-worker walking by and I decided to hit him with the football. The football slipped out of my hand and I hit a lady in the face, breaking her nose, and causing her to fall and get a concussion. FML
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Top comments
loller27 6
You have to know the 5 D's of dodgeball. Dodge, duck, dip, dive, and dodge.
JMTS 0
If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball...
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Comments (277)
kionnaloves 11
Looks like you won't be dating a cheerleader anytime soon.
bubo_fml 11
I was the big jock in school & terrorized the dodgeball games, taking great pleasure in pulverizing my foes. Then 1 day, I got beaned in the cods & hollered like a little girl! From that point on, I stuck up for everybody who couldn't defend themselves...Kharma taught, lesson learned!
babygirl_015 11
Dang!!!
jackdaniel61709 0
That was me
Potterfreakk 6
Sucks for youu.
Akharr01 5
Did it hurt ;) Sarcasm
redmeansgo 5
Next time, dodge the ball.
opi098514 1
Little FYI You can't bench more then your weight
stallion420 0
Yes you can im 156 58 i bench 240 twice so i think its possible
t765234 10
100- Do you know anything about lifting? That is completely wrong.
Dracoboxer357 36
100- Of course you can bench more than your body weight, I weigh 178 lbs and can bench just over 300 lbs, for a few reps. Hell, the world record bench was 1150lbs last time I checked by Ryan Kennelly. And he looks to weigh about 330lbs, give or take.
LolCakes111 7
If you can bench anything over 1000 lbs, you're probably looking like the tank from L4D. But #100, you sir, should have an idea what you're talking about.
Awsumuzzie 12
I can't tell... Is 100 a girl? Because I agree! Only for people like me... I'm 5'7" 140 pounds and I can bench 25, AHA! I know, Unbelievable.
DoveDoxy 0
100- you're f*cking retarded
Kinney97 6
#100^^ is clearly retarded... you can easily bench more than your weight, in fact most people should be able to bech ATLEAST your body weight, learn your shit before leving stupid comments
eclyse88 0
That's make no sense
KateLuvsYa 0
Ouch D;