Today, my parents decided to wake me up on my birthday. They flashed the lights and yanked off my bed sheets. I sleep naked. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I made my mom breakfast in bed for her birthday. She was naked when I went to give it to her. FML
Today, my mom woke me up and asked if I wanted breakfast. I had passed out naked on the kitchen floor after a party. FML
Today, I woke up to my mom washing the dishes completely naked. Sadly, I was more surprised by the fact she was doing the dishes than the fact that that she was strutting about in her birthday suit. FML
Today, my husband thought it'd be funny to trigger the alarm in the house while I was sleeping. Shocked, I ran outside naked. FML
Today, it's my 23rd birthday. My family - parents, siblings, and two cousins - asked to visit to help me celebrate. I agreed and spent some time cleaning my place up some. The catch: I relaxed a bit and did it while nude. It felt so nice, I forgot I was nude, so when they came at noon… well, it wasn't the birthday suit I'd hoped they'd see. FML
Today, it was my mom's birthday, I planned to wish her a happy birthday as she woke up. I opened the door to her room, only to see my dad dancing around in an American flag thong. Grimacing in pain, I closed the door right away. Not only am I forever disturbed, but now my dad is asking me how he looks naked. FML
Today, is my 16th birthday. Thinking that my parents would be out of town for it like they had every other year, I decided it would be fun to tan nude in my backyard. Apparantly my parents set up a surprise party for my sweet 16. I was standing naked infront of half my school. FML
Today, my parents woke me up by pouring a glass of freezing cold water over my head. Their reason? They were "bored". FML
Today, I found on the internet pictures of me sleeping. I sleep naked. FML
Today, I woke up naked, duck-taped to the wall, with no memory of last night. FML
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Top comments
OhDearBetrayal 25
This is my nightmare but hey it's not like they don't know what your body looks like.
aliyourpally 12
I bet your sheets smell like ass.
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Comments (154)
OhDearBetrayal 25
This is my nightmare but hey it's not like they don't know what your body looks like.
wowlolreally 12
Right ?! I would've started dancing in my birthday suit *techno beat*
ScenicSubterfuge 39
Why would someone take that chance?>.
CrissyyyS2 22
If it was a male... Morning wood would have been more awkward.
broncos67 9
33, It has happened to me a few times, just the worst.
Jelbeztok 17
I rarely get morning wood
tygerarmy 35
Morning wood wouldn't make it more awkward. I'd make it more awkward by not attempting to cover up. Then they'd leave and let me get dressed and possibly take care of my morning wood in peace. Birthday Happy to you OP.
QuinnyZebrass 11
My mom always uses that excuse to get offended when I tell her to leave the room so I can change. "Hey, I changed your diapers and wiped your butt! I pushed you out of me like a giant poop!" -_-
mandygrl25 18
It's a girl
kz5 6
So true
QuinnyZebrass 11
I'm sorry but I will never be able to explain my strange mother to you. That's coming from the same person who thought a cameltoe was when you wear socks with flip flops and had been using that term for 50 years before discovering what it really means. And I'm pretty sure there were doctors present when I was born unless she had me in a toilet, which would explain why she compares it to pooping D:
CrissyyyS2 22
You know... Maybe when she was giving birth... She "pushed" out more than just a newborn?
Wimoweh 10
There's your problem!
groovycrazyjoe 18
maybe she compared you to pooping because you ain't nothing but shit
jessi_sunshine 26
Well, #1, if they didn't before, they certainly do now!
DropTheDaggerxx 31
@75, it's actually pretty common for women to poop when they push as they give birth! If I recall correctly, there's actually an FML in which the OP had to pretend to give birth during a play and pretended a little too well, 'cause they shit themselves on stage.
Zyzz7 12
@72 i agree with 75, why does your mum seem to WANT to see you naked...?? Also, parents should really learn to knock.
QuadZero 1
It's more of a problem that some of the really conservative parents just plain freak out
rebamoo 14
Well the only thing is, a naked baby's body and a naked teen/adult's body look COMPLETELY different. I saw my brothers naked when they were babies, but that doesn't mean I would know what they look like now at 17 and 20!
abbybailey204 19
thanks for giving me a laugh for the day!
wlddog 14
There are times in life in life where you need to erect a stance of defiance. Not so sure you needed to bare that much sensitive skin. Perhaps you need to get thicker skin and learn to either be proud of your naked ideas, or better prepare yourself to hide your nakedness.
HannahLouise96 13
A swing and a miss, 49.
whos_ur_daddy1 19
What is 49 talking about..?
wlddog 14
I was trying to think of different terms to use while someone is naked. All in good fun. I never did look to see the sex of the op. was entertaining myself I guess.
aliyourpally 12
I bet your sheets smell like ass.
DDCA 24
You're probably jealous your sheets don't smell like ass more often...
Wimoweh 10
My sheets smell like decaying unicorn horns. U jelly?
SystemofaBlink41 27
I don't want my sheets to smell like ass... Regardless if it's a woman's or my own.
PoopNuggetLeader 4
Should have looked them dead in the eyes and fell back asleep.
Pandaman_92 10
OP would have to be pretty talented to fall back asleep while giving parents the death glare, but imagine the parents' potential reaction!
doodlecloud 27
Hope you weren't sleeping in a really weird, exposed position...but FYL, I'd be mortified either way. Next time they'll know to knock.
cara120895 7
Hopefully. Although if both of my parents had done that to me (I sleep naked too) my dad would be embarrassed and my mom would be upset and I'd just be like "give me back my darn covers!" So yeah. But not all parents learn from mistakes like that.
ananas99_fml 10
Wow
dr_snow_bear 29
I think someone is going after the comment badge. :P
zahra_786 19
Be glad it wasn't a big surprise with friends, family, cameras - the whole lot! :)
SystemofaBlink41 27
I remember my mom once invited some of my neighbors without me knowing and I came out of the shower naked. Good times!
Tika876 18
A surprise for everyone involved! The best kind if you ask me.
Zimmington 21
That has happened to me before. Don't worry OP they won't be bothering you again.
Blackphoenix 9
This is why I lock my door.
redbandit9877 12
She might not have a door on her room, I didn't until I had my own place and it was awful.
cupcakechick 17
most doors don't have locks, mine doesn't
kakarot2 11
Why would you sleep naked if your door doesn't have locks.... I wouldn't risk it
Ambient25 25
because sleeping naked feels awesome
emilyjgraham 34
Also, not many parents will go in and rip the covers off! I know both my parents know not to in any circumstance!!
gators1995 30
I don't have a door and I sleep in a loft.
cara120895 7
Not all teens an children have the luxury of their parents letting them own a door knob that has a lock.
tpm45 25
My lock is broken... My only protection is the fact that my bed is around a sharp corner, giving me a moment to wake up and cover up.