Today, my mother and girlfriend were joking around and talking about the embarrassing things I've done. After they'd had a lengthy conversation, my girlfriend mentioned, "And he always farts during sex." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. When we finished, he mentioned that he made me queef. I didn’t have the heart to tell him I actually farted during sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend discovered that I fart when I'm tickled enough. The best part was when he decided to show his family. FML
Today, I had a serious talk with my boyfriend about our relationship troubles. He stopped me in the middle of a sentence with a huge fart. FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I was apparently really loud, because when we finished I heard his mom and grandma sarcastically imitating me outside. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time in over a month. When I came, I thrust one last time and let out a huge fart. She couldn't keep her mouth shut about it, and now all our friends keep calling me "CumFart". FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, my hubby thought he made me queef during sex. I was too embarrassed ro tell him it was a fart I was holding in, but couldn’t once I orgsmed. FML
Today, while waiting for my boyfriend to get out of the shower, I chatted with his grandma. As soon as we hear him exit the restroom, she smirks at me and lets a huge, smelly fart out. She blamed it on me. My boyfriend believed her. FML
Today, my mother had just got home and we were both in the kitchen. She then starts to get out food and I smelled deviled eggs. Delighted, I asked, "Do I smell deviled eggs?" She turned around laughing and announced she'd farted. I effectively got hungry from my mother’s fart. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML
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Top comments
GigaPudding_fml 24
"Yeah, his father does that too!"
Lopee069 4
Then stop farting
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Comments (159)
miss_fab 0
thats just sad
Zeeshan69 0
Then his mother says and I quote, "aww he must get that from me, just ask any of the three guys I've been sleeping with." Just kidding OP don't take it personally
AbsOluteLAD 0
she must be desperate,to stay with you after you fart every time? C'mon man get it together.
AbsOluteLAD 0
LOL @ me
IceCweaaam 0
lol seriously?!
IbanezSprinter 0
haha I guess it depends on how old you are but if you're a teenager hahahaha your mom probably isn't too happy if you're older that's just awkward
ADub55 0
that stinks.
skadoosh52 0
literally..
mandel2000 0
euw.
Nyolia 11
Well, at least it isn't sharting.
hughsmith 0
amen
mariazzz 5
hey she's still with you and obviously finds it funny. she's a keeper!!
Draedlus 0
Well plug that cannon up.
Diablo666 0
I feel u bro! what a lying bitch! actually that farting noise is from her ******, quif!
Kitkat_4111 1
lol nice