Today, I had a serious talk with my boyfriend about our relationship troubles. He stopped me in the middle of a sentence with a huge fart. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time and we were alone. He was being super romantic and snuggling with me, and then out of nowhere he let out the biggest fart I've ever heard. He then explained how I should try to compete with it. FML
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. While getting down on one knee, he farted. FML
Today, I hung out with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. We were cuddling on the couch when he suddenly stands up. I thought he was going to hug me, but then he turned around, pinned my shoulders back so I couldn't move, and farted in my face. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. I had to fart really badly, so thinking that he wouldn't hear me, I did so. He heard me and asked, "Did you fart?" I said "No, it was my dog." I don't have a dog, and he knows this. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, I went over to my boyfriend's apartment and I smelled a delicious aroma as I walked in so I asked him what he was cooking. His response was, "I'm not cooking anything. I just farted." FML
Today, my boyfriend of six months said he wanted to take our relationship one step further. I thought he was going to ask me to move in. He meant he wanted to fart in front of me. FML
Today, while waiting for my boyfriend to get out of the shower, I chatted with his grandma. As soon as we hear him exit the restroom, she smirks at me and lets a huge, smelly fart out. She blamed it on me. My boyfriend believed her. FML
Today, during an argument that he couldn't win, my boyfriend farted in a glass, covered it with his hand, ran to me, and let it go it right in front of my nose. FML
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Top comments
SkoomaKi 28
"Better out than in" -Shrek
MolesterStallone 13
I have a feeling he wasn't listening!
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Comments (119)
MolesterStallone 13
I have a feeling he wasn't listening!
nado13579 12
No, you think so?
MolesterStallone 13
I said it so I would say no shit?
Boygenius50 8
"Team Peeta" in 3's bio ruined all credibility they may have had.
nado13579 12
Meh, I just thumbed myself down. I admit that comment was shit. I could have come up with better. And I didn't check or change my description for a while so I just added to the Peeta part, because I'm starting to dislike the teams thing, it reminds me too much of Twilight. :/ So now I support Peeta Bread. :]
samiiii_fml 2
I don't care how old you are, farts are and always will be humorous. He just wanted to bring light to the situation.
fireysaje 10
It's such a funny sound!
Grimmerie 31
32: Edit it again. You're 13 and in no position to address anyone else as "child".
scrappy23 4
#1 nice car .. what is it?
NissanDriftKing 4
Its a Nissan GTR.
JocelynKaulitz 28
"Was that a fart? I can taste it…on my tongue. Is that onion?…onion and ketchup" -Seth Rogen (Step Brothers)
Tektite 14
Lol you for real bro
nado13579 12
32- I still do call myself a kid, though. I'm not one of those kids who think they're all grown up. My friends and I just have a running joke where we call people "child". Even each other. :) I know it's not that funny. And I do regret my earlier comment. I just thought it was obvious, but I guess most didn't think so. I'm sorry for being rude, 1. :/
MolesterStallone 13
You are forgiven :)
iiDangerCloseBK 6
Maybe that's a sign to move on?
PerfasarusRex 3
"I broke up with my boyfriend cause he farted"...no
Andrew910 5
It's a sign that he needs to poop.
stolencookie 17
25 - well maybe that was his answer to how much he cared...
loloalltheway 23
People commenting on fml are so quick to tell the OPs to move on...
SkoomaKi 28
"Better out than in" -Shrek
SuaSponte 1
"Did you just soil yourself? Maybe.. It did sound a little wet, right at the end. Let's have a smell..wafting, wafting.. Oh, everyone likes their own brand, don't they? Okay, analysis..it smells like carrots and throw up." -Austin Powers, Goldmember.
007type 26
Or: Better out then in. - Hagrid (HP2)
hopsinlove17 26
^overachiever
maxmex13 7
"Believe me Donkey if it was me you'd be dead" -Shrek
ambowew 7
B-but Hagrid wasn't talking about farting then sucking it back up your hole. He was talking about expelling slugs from your mouth! Different situation, mate!
afropuffjake 9
"It ain't comin off no stone neither..." Donkey
rocklare18 7
Mother told me it's not good to hold it in. Squeeze, flex, and squirt it out!
MrBrightside21 20
"I had my mouth open and everything. You gotta give me a warning or something." -Noble Steed(shrek)
joep1 7
It's natural! Hes very open with you just not at a good time. Sorry op.
Petepoop 6
You obviously haven't smelled my farts...
joep1 7
Okay...
guy24 9
Or he is just trying to get dumped. :P
snakeassault 0
/me deploys downvote umbrella Very nice picture 5.
conrad01 6
Gas ALWAYS takes priority...
LolFMLnot 10
I love how in all FML's people are like "move on blah blah" Like no just stop. No relationship is perfect , if OP is with him then that means she likes/loves him.
senbonzakura90 3
That pretty much says what your boyfriend thinks about the relationship sorry OP
senbonzakura90 3
**** you guys
RaveBlade 4
Continue your sentence with a slap
BountyBass 13
Better out then in
SkoomaKi 28
Sounds familiar...
ambowew 7
#11 You crack one out then suck it back in? That's talent, right there! Form a line, ladies!
LMFAOwned 9
Surely the farts aren't the reason for the troubles?
lidsthesquid 4
Obviously not, just the cherry on top. ;_;