Today, my husband was arrested because a fox, fleeing from about a billion dogs and rich twats on horses, jumped through our car window, and cowered between my legs. He got out of the car, waded through the dogs, and pulled one of the twats off his horse into a puddle, ruining his red coat. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to bail my drunk husband out of jail after he and his best friend tried to steal a police horse from an officer. FML
Today, I was chased out of my own house by my wife's lover's dog. FML
Today, my boyfriend has severe dog phobia, and a dog off its lead ran up to him in a car park. He panicked and tried to jump into the car, but the door hit it in the head and it started fitting and seizing. About three people called the police and the dog's owner broke our car window. FML
Today, an asshat in a Foghorn Leghorn t-shirt let his piece-of-crap mongrel dog do some sort of rain dance on the roof of my car, scratching the paintwork. He was a huge guy, so my backbone left town and I just smiled as if it was cute. FML
Today, my wife got drunk and stopped for a pee against the wheel of a parked police car, with three coppers and a dog inside it. FML
Today, after years of researching and saving money, I got a pet fox. I was able to enjoy the majesty of the animal for three hours before it burrowed under the fence and ran away. FML
Today, my husband got charged with felony animal cruelty, because while I was at work, he shot someone's hunting dog on our property. I'm a veterinarian. This should be great for my reputation. FML
Today, I was driving home with my girlfriend. As we turned onto our block, she shrieked that our dog was running down the street and into traffic. I jumped out of the moving car and chased him for about a mile, only to give up, go home, and find out it wasn't our dog. FML
Today, I got pulled over by the cops for swerving a lot while driving. I tried to explain that my dog bit the back of my neck, but as soon as I opened my door to show him the bite marks and the dog, he ran out of the car. I still can't find him. FML
Today, I came home and found a few of my faux fur coats completely butchered. On my way to interrogate my boys, the only ones home, I found our husky dog, who was recently shaved for an operation, covered in the fur that once belonged to my coat. My boys said 'he was cold'. FML
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Top comments
Marcella1016 32
Wouldn’t it have been easier to just drive away with the fox?
LovelyMe1222 6
That poor fox!!!!!!! This makes me wanna cry. Foxes are my favorite animal and they don't deserve to be hunted for sport!!!
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Comments (14)
RichardPencil 32
Tally ho, old chap! So, your husband goes to the clink and the fox ends up between your legs? Seems like your husband got... ...outfoxed, so to speak.
MidnaLink 35
See people, getting arrested is worth it! For the right reasons, of course.
LovelyMe1222 6
That poor fox!!!!!!! This makes me wanna cry. Foxes are my favorite animal and they don't deserve to be hunted for sport!!!
Marcella1016 32
Wouldn’t it have been easier to just drive away with the fox?
RichardPencil 32
What does the fox say?
Yudith 28
Today, I was minding my own business when a million dogs and a dozen rich twats on horses started to chase me. I ran for my life and luckily found an open car window. I jumped into the car, just to find my hiding spot was between some lady's legs. The lady's mate got out of the car, pulled one of the twats into the ditch, and got arrested by more twats in silly hats. No, I couldn't stay with the nice lady. FML
RichardPencil 32
That's certainly more impressive than "Moo." ******' overrated cows.
Peter Hubbard 5
could have just drove off with the fox, violence rarely ends up being worth it
historygrad74 19
I hate fox hunting! Your husband did a great thing!
Warp1978 15
Good on ya, I would have bloodied his nose. ******* foxhunting *****
Jonkbaby 23
Are you all and the fox okay?
Binks Jones 3
a salute for your husband, top man fox hunters should be eaten by their own dogs. also, in the UK using dogs for hunting, is illegal.