Today, my husband thought it would be funny to mow a penis into our lawn. I guess he forgot my parents are coming over. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, we were having a family get together at my house. Because of this, I had to mow our lawn to make sure it looked nice. I got a little bored and decided it would be funny to cut a rather large penis into my yard. Right when I'd finished, I ran out of gas. My 83 year-old grandmother saw. FML
Today, one of the kids in my neighborhood told me he would mow my lawn for 10 bucks. After a few minutes, I heard the mower stop. He had mowed a penis into my front yard then run away. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to mow a dick into my grandmother's lawn, but the mower leaked gasoline and now there's a giant dead grass outline. FML
Today, I thought I would surprise my dad by mowing our entire two acre lawn. When he got home, instead of being grateful like I had hoped, he yelled at me for cutting in vertical lines instead of horizontal. FML
Today, wanting to do something nice for my dad, I mowed the lawn. He grounded me for "emasculating" him. FML
Today, my father bought a riding lawn mower. We don't have a lawn. FML
Today, I got home late to find my dad outside mowing the lawn in the dark. I told him the neighbors were going to think he lost his marbles for mowing it at that time. He then informed me he wasn't mowing it, he was vacuuming it. FML
Today, I walked into the kitchen to find my father trimming his pubes over the bin with our kitchen scissors. FML
Today, my husband finally got round to cutting down a tree limb in our front yard after months of me begging him. It fell on me. FML
Today, while we had my husband's boss over, my 3-year-old son decided to burst into the living room naked and yell, "Mum, look! Penis!" and wiggle it around. FML
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Top comments
zingline89 18
Oh no, he remembered alright
Mech1989 13
That is insanely funny. Hopefully your parents are pretty easy going.
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Comments (85)
reflexion213 11
You're married and live on your own but still pretend to be someone else to your parents? There's more wrong with you than your husband.
interesting33 37
A lot of people are like that with their parents. In some generations it was typical that parents and children didn't always confide and things and that was just how it was I think.
reflexion213 11
I'm aware. Doesn't make it any less sad though. A person should be the same regardless of the company around them.
smb12346 17
Reminds me of this.. Today, we were having a family get together at my house. Because of this, i had to mow our lawn to make sure it looked nice. I got a little bored and decided it would be funny to cut a rather large penis into my yard. right when i finished, i ran out of gas. My 83 year old grandmother saw. FML
graceinsheepwear 34
yeah but it will look like like a big green cucumber.
interesting33 37
Mow over it quickly?
alexsandria83 18
That's hilarious ! I wouldn't be able to stay mad at him:)
vegeta77 4
Who cares? It's his house. I'd smack your dad in the mouth if he got pissed.
onorexveritas 24
real mature
aimeecuria 9
What a lad
blackgirllb 12
rotfl
thatkidhesh 11
your husband is awesome. I wish I had the balls to do that.