Today, my husband finally got round to cutting down a tree limb in our front yard after months of me begging him. It fell on me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was trying to convince my husband to not trim the lower branches of my favorite tree. After pleading my case, I turned around and ran smack into one of said branches. My face and my dignity still hurt. FML
Today, my father was pruning the tree in our front yard. I was helping him collect the falling branches. At one point, a branch fell and I was under it. My father jumped to push me out of the way. Instead he pushed the branch into my face. FML
Today, I cut down a dead tree in my yard. The top hit the ground and the base seesawed up in the air and came down on my head. I hit the ground like a sack of flour. Fortunately, the wood was rotted and soft. Unfortunately, the chainsaw was still running. 28 stitches in my calf. FML
Today, I finally went to Home Depot to buy a chainsaw to cut down the tree leaning dangerously over my garage. When I got home, I found the tree had fallen and taken out the roof while I was shopping. FML
Today, I decided to clear up some storm damage. I carefully cut a tree that was threatening to fall on my house. It fell on my neighbor's house instead. He's taking me to court for damages. FML
Today, I was at Home Depot getting a Christmas tree with my family. While picking out a tree, a man thought it would be nice to help cut off the string that held the tree together. The branches hit me in the face and the guy managed to cut my hand. FML
Today, I watched one of my neighbor's trees fall into the electrical lines outside my house. This was after he took a chainsaw to the tree. He refuses to cover the damages. FML
Today, I was awakened by the sound of chain-saws. Moments later a tree branch came through my roof. FML
Today, I got super psyched up about a landscaping project my wife denied last year that she's finally game for, which will both fix a water leak into the house, and make our backyard look amazing. I took a week of PTO, then 20 minutes later my wife called to tell me a tree in our back yard fell over. We're also probably getting divorced. FML
Today, a tree fell on our 3-month-old family car. Today, I also learned that my husband never insured it. It's probably scrap, and we still have to pay it off for the next 5 years. FML
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Top comments
mfmylifesrsly 30
Maybe you shouldn't have been standing in the way then?...
BIEBERSLAYER 10
well even trees hate nagging.
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Comments (136)
mfmylifesrsly 30
Maybe you shouldn't have been standing in the way then?...
MicMic_fml 7
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Kharma..
Jacobt24 19
Karma*. And this is a YDI because you don't stand under trees when branches are being cut down
MrMonk 5
maybe it wasn't an accident...
fmyli 0
what was op like oh hey like a falling branch. should i move?
DontModMeDammit 10
George George, George of the jungle..ehh I'll stop while I'm ahead..
changetheworld 0
If you're going to nag about a tree limb being cut, maybe you shouldn't do it under 'said' tree limb. Just a thought.
Isabel312 0
What really happened was op was about to walk inside and her husband got the branch, went behind her, and hit her in the head with it, then exclaiming in his football touchdown voice,"what now, bitch!" he then realized she was unconcious and told her this story instead.
dinodannyrawr 5
you should sleep with her husband :)
paolayupp 6
if I were the husband, right after the branch fell on her, I would have started singing 'Move bitch! get out the way, get out the way bitch!'
baddud300 6
Well how do you think the tree feels.. he had someone constantly plotting to kill him? Him falling on you was just his last dying attempt to take you with him.
flamegrilled123 3
chin up
WallyTheWombat 0
She was probably standing under the branch and nagging at him while he was cutting it down. You could have always done it yourself if you wanted it down so bad.
redsfan 4
Why wasn't op in the kitchen? Unless it fell through the roof and struck her.
n_epic_fail 14
karma's a bitch, irony on the other hand is funny as shit xD
GrandmaPearl 0
Wamp wamp WAMPPP!
Pawned71 0
how big was the tree, that you survived to type an FML?
BIEBERSLAYER 10
well even trees hate nagging.
Jacobt24 19
Karma*
Jacobt24 19
wow i replied to 12. dumb iPhone
Lauren10102 3
Picky, picky, picky!!!
Dr_Jalepenos 0
your still alive?!?!
Dead_Master 0
Awww that sucks!!
dinodannyrawr 5
give him sone ass an he would of done it sooner.. :)
GrandmaPearl 0
Laugh my ass off!!
iAmScrubs 19
Don't panic! We may still be able to save your ass before there is massive blood loss. The stitching process may be very painful, though.
jrgr 6
hahaha! (:
DKjazz 20
Whatever you do, don't use local anesthetic.
kmarrs 2
Were you standing under it?
LordGoober 13
No, the ******* limb flew 20 ft. over to land on op before it fell.
seeunexttuesdays 6
wow someone didn't read the FML!
Sacurason 0
Ah, the lolz. That just tickled me.
aprilmayjune93 0
watch out for that tree!
emeraldchicky 0
Win. (;
cutiepie343 7
Win
zombieekillah93 0
you were kinda asking for it....he was just doing what ya asked him to
unlucky90 4
I freaking love your pic
EvilTeddysRock 2
someone got Bugs Bunnied =P