Today, my husband is sulking because I wouldn't let him do what he's always wanted to do: throw our cat out the second floor window to see if she would land safely and on all fours. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I shut the door to the bedroom so my wife and I could have a serious talk. Unfortunately, the cat stuck his paw under the door and started flailing around, causing me to bust up laughing at a bad moment. My wife was furious, threw a water bottle at me, and locked me out overnight. FML
Today, I once again walked in on my husband eating our cat's food. FML
Today, I walked in on my husband eating cat food out of the cat bowl dressed in a cat costume. FML
Today, my boyfriend got irrationally pissed at me because his cat decided to sit on my lap instead of his. FML
Today, my husband staggered home after a night of drinking. He was too intoxicated to find the toilet so he started to pee in the cat's litter box. Apparently, he was invading her territory and she attacked him. His scream as she bit and scratched him must have woken the whole world. FML
Today, my cat jumped out a fourth-story window when I went to pet her. FML
Today, my husband scraped his shin while trying to pull down our window blinds. He screamed and shouted at me, because it was "all my fault." How? I opened the blinds the day before, and rolled them up "too high." I'm staying married despite all this toxicity. FML
Today, I was relaxing on the sofa with the cat purring on my lap. My husband blasted an air horn. I'm now covered in cat scratches and piss, from both myself and the cat. I'm going to skin him. FML
Today, my pregnancy hormones were so bad, I broke down crying because my cat sat on my husband's lap instead of mine. FML
Today, after an argument with my husband, I was sat in the front room calming down when the stupid cat decided she was going to jump up onto me, spilling a full coffee cup over my husband's PS5. He's convinced I did it on purpose after the argument, when it really was all the damn cat's fault FML
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Top comments
writerchic85 26
Throw your husband out the window to test the theory
i_wuz_nver_here 31
This is why cats hate us...
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Comments (115)
vmorgantank 15
That is hilarious you should get a tester cat and let him do it
aimbug 42
I'm glad you were there Op. He could have seriously injured the cat.
spookyboy 20
When I was little we had an indoor/outdoor cat and once we moved to a second story apartment the cat would jump off the balcony and walk all the way to my old house. No matter how many times we brought him to the apartment he kept jumping and running. After so many tries we just let him live at the old house. I wouldn't suggest throwing your cat obviously but it's possible for them to land and be fine.
worldclassrager 41
Find him a video online...that set his mind at ease...i hope...keep the cat out of your husbands hands...
Migole 36
Holy shit, I would seriously reevaluate my relationship if my husband/boyfriend wanted to try something like this. You never ever put an animal in danger just because you "want to see what happens". Also a short google search will show you that stories 2-5/6 are actually the most dangerous bc the cat has no time to adjust their body and can absolutely lead to broken bones or even death (a fall from a 10th story on concrete will also squish your cat of course so always use safety nets!). And there's a big difference between deliberately jumping and being thrown/losing their grip! In case 1 the cat is prepared for the jump and already in the right position.
Catdragon 40
I would actually get a divorce if I was in your situation, but that's just me. keep a close eye on the cat and if you find him abusing it, then he needs some help.
socialix 4
Same.
maximumcarnage 13
let him do it its only 2 stories ice seen cats fall from higher places
VetTech417 4
Wow you're all idiots. I've seen cats break their femurs (big leg bone) falling off a refrigerator, more then once. Just because cats can survive falls doesn't mean they always will, especially if it's not by their choice.
Keiraquarium 12
Your husband sounds like a ******* psycho.
IJustWantToDie 7
Stfu that was a pointless FML