Today, my grandma said, "I know you don't have any plans tonight. Do you want to go to bingo with me?" I said sure out of pity, and ended up being her designated driver after she got wasted later in the evening. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my grandmother's excuse for not going to my college graduation was because she'd already bought her bingo card. FML
Today, I was visiting my grandmother at her retirement community. Bingo is really popular there and she loves it, so I went thinking it would be a fun activity for us. I won the jackpot and my car got keyed by a group of angry old people. FML
Today, I had to pick my grandma up because she was drunk, at church, at 9am. FML
Today, my grandmother drunk dialed me at midnight to wish me a happy new year. I was already in bed. My grandmother has a better social life than I do. FML
Today, I lost a bet with my grandma, and now she's coming with me on my next date. FML
Today, during a family reunion, my 89 year-old grandma stood up and drunkenly made a speech about how ashamed I should be of myself for still being single. She then passed out at the table. Half my family got up to help her, the other half whispered in agreement. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I hosted a family game night with her grandparents and her father, who was bringing his "friend" who he'd been dating for a couple of weeks. It was my mom. FML
Today, my grandma and I went to visit one of her friends. The elderly gentleman told me I'd grown into a very beautiful young woman, to which my grandma replied, "Have you started in on the sherry early this evening, Henry?" FML
Today, I was with my grandma in my new car. She suddenly says, "I've got to pee bad." Without giving me enough time to find a gas station, she blurts out, "Never mind, I just did." FML
Today, my grandma told everyone at our party to stay away from me, saying, "Ya might catch obesity from her and become fatass porkers too." I complained to my dad, at which point my gran faked being inebriated. My dad rolled his eyes and said, "She's DRUNK, honey. Chill out." FML
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Top comments
beckiebear 15
Party with grandma! You should have just drank with her and taken a cab home. Live it up, OP!
pistachiopanda 19
Ever stop to think that she invited you out of pity? Harsh.
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Comments (64)
Km1490 20
Cool grandma
siggy_mcsigx 22
Maybe you're not living a fabulous social life because you have irrational unprovoked aggression toward male genitalia? (referring to OP's name)
steffidallasbfl 16
Wow bingo is getting pretty intense nowadays to be drinking
worldclassrager 41
Did you win anything good? Maybe she'll invite you to play bridge and to a knitting party as well :D Don't worry about it...you might have saved a life by driving her...
Gityerchicken 12
Go granny go!
california_143 7
Lol coolest grandma ever if u ask me
Ray_of_midnight 23
Grandma, dear Grandma, come home with me now, This bingo game's running too late. (with apologies to Henry Clay Work)
lopesindustries 5
Hang over 4 grandma edition
outoftown 27
She's trying to teach you how to have a good time... just a bit too much of one.
kmartFTW 12
Drunken nights at bingo! #FTW #YOLO #MUCHSWAG