Anonymous
United States
Today, I had to pick my grandma up because she was drunk, at church, at 9am. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Today, I had to go pick up my mother at 3 in the morning. She had been out drinking and couldn't drive. She parties more than I do. FML
my cheese grater + your dick
Saskatoon, Canada
Today, my grandma said, "I know you don't have any plans tonight. Do you want to go to bingo with me?" I said sure out of pity, and ended up being her designated driver after she got wasted later in the evening. FML
morningbirdie
Drunk level: 2000
Today, I had to pick up my dad because he was too drunk to drive home. Drive his wheelchair home, that is. FML
driverboy
United States
Today, I had to pick up and drive home a couple of drunk bitches. Unfortunately, one of these drunk bitches was my mother. FML
Congrats to me
Canton, United States
Today, the only person in my entire family to show up sober and on time to my graduation was my grandma. FML
Anonymous
Invercargill, New Zealand
Today, during a family reunion, my 89 year-old grandma stood up and drunkenly made a speech about how ashamed I should be of myself for still being single. She then passed out at the table. Half my family got up to help her, the other half whispered in agreement. FML
kylie18xx21
United States
Today, I had to leave my ACT prep class ten minutes in to pick up my drunken father from his best friend's baby shower. I picked him up along with a bill for the damage. FML
nyebust
United States
Today, my grandmother drunk dialed me at midnight to wish me a happy new year. I was already in bed. My grandmother has a better social life than I do. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff
United States
Harsh but fair
Today, I had to pick up my drunk mom at bar. While we were driving home, she thanked me over and over again, and then said, "Thank god you have no life!" FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom
It's just liquid fun
Today, I caught my mom trying to get secretly smashed out of her brain-box on booze at 8:00 a.m. FML
Top comments
DontClickOnMe 28
Sounds like a cool grandma.
disco2466 8
your grandma is gangsta
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Comments (114)
DontClickOnMe 28
Sounds like a cool grandma.
LookOnBrightSide 12
1-Grannies know how to party. OP, your grandma is bring the house-of-worship down and raising the roof. Raptor Jesus would be proud.
ScottieJo 8
What is up with your dp?
NiiTeH 7
11- partying super hard, infact
DontClickOnMe 28
14 - What's up with yours?
bubblekitty 1
Driver gets pulled over Cop - what's in that bottle sir? Driver - water Cop - but this is wine Driver - praise the Lord this is a miracle!
nic7973 23
i love your granma!
grahambertus 11
It seems that she drank a bit too much of Jesus' blood.
marinus_fml 20
20, what's up with yours?
kbtoyz69 9
9000!!!!
kerrwoof 13
I think we can all learn from your grandma. I hope I'm that cool when I'm old
capilot 10
Yeppers. Add a pickup truck and you've got the makings for a great country song.
QuitStaring 0
I did it.. I clicked on you.
DustyLyn1 9
Me too...
disco2466 8
your grandma is gangsta
Stallion91 6
Sounds like a rough Saturday night
fymother 13
Did she drink all the wine at Communion? Lol
01sparkly 15
Too much of Christ's blood?
Greendaycheese 12
Your grandma has swag.
kooochris1995 14
SWOG!!!!!
skinnylea 0
Yeah she got hella swag bro
Pwib 14
Had too much wine at communion.
yahoowizard 16
Probably brought in water to drink, but little did she know, Jesus had turned it all into wine
LouisianaBob 9
She probably spiked the blood of christ all on her own.
ScottieJo 8
"Is this really the blood of Christ?" "Yes" "Wow, that guy must have been wasted 24 hours a day huh?"
Pentium_4 27
hey, old livers can't handle much. she probably had one glass haha
Goatinsfriend 8
Some grandparents are really awesome these days. Your grandma is one of them.
xXRazelleLuniiXx 9
Maybe Grandma want's to party. You whippersnappers can't have all the fun!
xXRazelleLuniiXx 9
*wants. I have no idea why I included the apostrophe.
xx000o 27
Sometimes we try too hard to get it wright.
littlemsweirdo 12
How cute.
lrgenesis 19
I wish that were my grandma. Instead mine sits at home with her cats and reads ten year old newspapers