Today, my girlfriend felt bad about a rude comment she made to me, and asked me to insult her in return. I told her she was getting fat. Wrong move; now she's not speaking to me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I took my girlfriend out for lunch, and I asked her if I could have a bite of her meal. She took it to mean I was calling her fat, and stormed out. FML
Today, my girlfriend started insulting me on Facebook. Angry and hurt, I let it all out and insulted her back with her obesity. Turns out it was her brother who used her account to play a "prank" on me. FML
Today, while in the shower with my girlfriend she was going on and on about how she thinks she's fat when she's in perfect shape. With what she said still on my mind, I meant to say "honey, you're so beautiful", but accidentally said "honey, you're so fat". I'll be sleeping alone tonight. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend what she thought of a certain plus-sized vocalist, to which she replied, "She's gorgeous!" I said, "That's great because you remind me a lot of her." Now she's not talking to me. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 5 years dumped me because she got tired of me being thinner than her and, in her own words, making her look bad. FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I've recently become serious about getting fit, and have lost nearly 84 pounds. Apparently, when I was fat, I made her look smaller in comparison. When I got slimmer, she insisted I either gain the weight back or she'd leave. So she did. FML
Today, while having dinner with my boyfriend's family, his mom told me that it looks like I've gained quite some weight. When my boyfriend told her that this was a rude thing to say, she said it wasn't rude, just the truth. FML
Today, I went out to lunch with my girlfriend. I asked if she was going to finish her meal, hoping to steal a bite or two. She somehow took this as me calling her fat, threw her drink at me, and stormed off. I just wanted some steak. FML
Today, my girlfriend threw a bitch fit about her clothes not fitting and how she’s “so fat” to the point of storming out of the house when I asked her to please calm down. Just a couple of hours earlier, we'd ordered food and she ordered a salad, then asked to trade my burger and fries with her. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML
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Top comments
ifuckmonsters 5
And you're surprised?
RochelleRedvines 8
She asked for it. Literally.
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Comments (144)
elm1 6
Rule #1 of dating a girl # NEVER CALL HER FAT ....YDI
Saikon1357 25
Allow me to explain this to you. YOU ARE A DUMBASS.
HOB0HUNTER 2
No, #95, he isn't. SHE is, for being too stupid to connect the dots. She asked him to insult her, he did. It was probably the first thing to pop into his mind as something insulting to a girl. Instead of recognizing it as an asked for insult she took it the wrong way.
feefifofumxx 13
Well, that comment probably hurt a lot more than her rude comment
Kalipczo 21
Wrong move bro. Should have said something along the lines of 'sometimes I feel like you're too perfect..'
Obryn 9
Test failed.
Nehechow 0
It's a trap!
Locoluis 15
She wanted something silly and in proportion to what she said. NOT TO BE REMINDED OF SUCH AN HORRIBLY HURTFUL TRUTH
kittenmeownyan 18
Ydi! You must know nothing about girls
Nicnic5000 4
If I was a dumbass that wanted to get my dick bitten off then I would call my girlfriend fat too! lolz
KiddNYC1O 22
So she asks for it and you're being honest but she gets angry? That's bullshit.