Today, I took my girlfriend out for lunch, and I asked her if I could have a bite of her meal. She took it to mean I was calling her fat, and stormed out. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went out to lunch with my girlfriend. I asked if she was going to finish her meal, hoping to steal a bite or two. She somehow took this as me calling her fat, threw her drink at me, and stormed off. I just wanted some steak. FML
Today, my girlfriend threw a bitch fit about her clothes not fitting and how she’s “so fat” to the point of storming out of the house when I asked her to please calm down. Just a couple of hours earlier, we'd ordered food and she ordered a salad, then asked to trade my burger and fries with her. FML
Today, my girlfriend felt bad about a rude comment she made to me, and asked me to insult her in return. I told her she was getting fat. Wrong move; now she's not speaking to me. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were out to dinner. She had to use the bathroom, so she went, but the food came while she was in there. She came out, yelling at me for ordering the food to come that exact time, then she broke up with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend is mentally unhinged. She had a full on temper tantrum and ranted about healthy eating, and how she’s “fat” and needs to lose 30 pounds, all because I suggested Buffalo Wild Wings for dinner. She stormed out of the house. I later ran into her at a local pizza place, devouring a pizza. FML
Today, I was in a restaurant with my fiancée for dinner. I commented that she had some food around her mouth. She responded with a lecture, then by throwing her hot bowl of noodles at me, before stomping out the restaurant. FML
Today, I asked a girl at the restaurant I work at if she'd had enough to eat. When she said yes, I said, "Are you sure?" I didn't realize how insulting it sounded until her equally overweight mom was up in my face, demanding to see my manager. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to a restaurant we both like. By the end of the date, we were fighting and she angrily broke up with me. To make things worse, I got food poisoning. She didn't. FML
Today, I felt like going to the gym. I asked my girlfriend if she wanted to come with me. She screamed at me for supposedly implying that she's fat. No, I just wanted to go to the gym with someone. FML
Today, I went on a date. After we finished our meal, I had to use the bathroom really bad. When I said so, my date totally lost it and accused me of planning on climbing out a window and ditching her. "Fuck that and fuck you!" she said, then stormed out, leaving me with the bill. FML
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Top comments
sweetprettykitty 10
Bitches be trippin.
miss_jules 11
How could you asking for a bite of her food possibly make her think that? That is so illogical I can't even think of a reason.
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Comments (63)
sweetprettykitty 10
Bitches be trippin.
Lebeaugars95 20
trippin n bitchin
EphMi 5
maybe its because she is fat, that's why she's sensitive to any food related jokes.
pinkster2014 25
No, they be crazay (anyone watch Domics? hahaha xD)
ScottVining 21
Women are confusing yet we can't live without them.
Spyingcheeseman 8
can't live with them. can't live without them.
baseballbv 17
Women... Can't live with them, pass the beer nuts. Women... Can't live with them, can't successfully refute their hypotheses. One old reference, one newer one
sweetprettykitty 10
#26 its more like "can't live with 'em, can't kill 'em"
TiroC 25
One example that I will never understand women! :)
LittleBlackbird 20
Women don't even understand women.
cakefete2 31
If only they came with a womanual. Sadly, even then it would be tailored to only one woman and not any others.
sterling1113 15
@25; Women understand women, and we hate each other!(some women, anyway.)
aisg 14
The joys of miscommunication.
gjikvtj 18
Or hormone induced misinterpretation
DraconicFeline 31
...Or just misinterpretation. People that blame everything on hormones annoy me.
ThomasBombadil 31
Maybe it's how you said it?
Saywat145 17
Just tell her what you meant. I don't see how that could mean you are calling her fat, but all girls have different modes of sensitivity.
miss_jules 11
How could you asking for a bite of her food possibly make her think that? That is so illogical I can't even think of a reason.
Queensland 27
It probably made her think he only wanted a bite in order to make her eat less
worldclassrager 41
That's a pretty normal question...just an overreaction
transcedental 18
Ah, the times when I misread the FML due to the previous one... (calling her fart.) ;D Anyway, nobody can blame you for being hungry, I guess she's having some issues about her weight, nothing you can't fix. ^^
Tymaster5 22
Read again
95DeVille 13
"Men: We don't know what we did!"
cakefete2 31
But, we are very sorry and promise not to do that thing that we did again, until the next time that it happens, then we'll be even more sorry.
95DeVille 13
Yes we are always sorry for what we may do in the future.