wtfdaughter
Recife, Brazil
Today, my daughter put a doll in the microwave "to keep her warm". She's 17. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Applecross, Australia
Today, my daughter asked me how long she had to put her 2-minute noodles in the microwave for. FML
Anonymous
Fremont, United States
Today, I left my daughter with a babysitter for the first time. When I came home, my microwave was ruined because they had attempted to heat cans of Play-Doh as a science experiment. FML
grrrrrr
United States
Today, I grounded my daughter for putting play doh in the toaster. She's 17 and got into Columbia early admissions. FML
jimmy
Orangeville, Canada
Today, my 5-year-old son put my car keys in the microwave thinking that they would 'warm up' my car. FML
Anonymous
Gainesville, United States
Today, my eight-year-old microwaved our thermometer to see if the temperature would change. FML
sunil
Calgary, Canada
Today, my 8-year-old son microwaved his pet hamster. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff
United States
Twisted firestarter
Today, my daughter somehow got a hold of the lighter we keep on top of the fridge. I found this out when she snuck up behind me and thought it would be fun to set my hair on fire. FML
Anonymous
Little brat
Today, my 14 year-old daughter is so selfish that on her sister's birthday, she found the present, assumed it must be for her, opened it, then destroyed it when she saw it was frozen Anna and Elsa dolls because she hates Frozen. Her sister loves Frozen, and hasn’t stopped crying over Anna’s severed head. FML
baldspot
Australia
Today, my daughter decided to wake me up by putting the vacuum in my hair and turning it on. FML
DeepFriedLettuce
Vashon, United States
Today, I had to explain to my seventeen year-old daughter that deep frying food doesn't "melt the calories." FML
Top comments
WeLikeIke 23
10 years later: "Mommy, I'm cold!" "Here, Here, Timmy, let's get cozy in the oven!" NEWS ALERT: Mother of one faces charges after attempting to kill son with an.. Oven?
Mynamewontfi 40
And won't breed.
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Comments (97)
khorstmye 15
"And please remember to spay and neuter your children!"--read in the voice of Bob Barker
PlutoUnfried2010 8
Why is your 17 year old playing with a doll?
blondemistress 7
you know you failed as a parent when...
jessdexter 5
she should be over dolls by now
afallingstar 22
On the upside its a doll not a child...although what is a 17 year old doing still playing with dolls?
ChibiChibi_fml 28
There is nothing wrong with still having dolls at seventeen. It is only a trait of the uptight and unimaginative to believe that getting older means giving up everything you ever loved and loved to do when you were younger.
softviking 12
Actually, it does exist dolls and teddybears that are ment to be microvawed. They are often filled with wheatgrass etc, that will keep the doll warm for so and so long after being in the oven. They are ment to keep you warm during cold nights, or to ease pains from muscles and limbs.
Uuuuxc 7
there are at least 6 things wrong with this
doglady 16
Yikes. I hope she's on reliable birth control.
sarah2453 17
And you call yourself a parent HOW?! Good lord.