Today, me and my girlfriend went paintballing. I made sure we were on the same team, so I could protect her and be manly. The first time she got shot was by me, I shot her finger. It broke. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went paint-balling with my girlfriend. As we drove she was scared about getting shot a lot, especially in the head. I reassured her that with all the protective gear it was unlikely. First round, within a minute, she gets shot 3 times in the back of the head. FML
Today, I played paintball with a bunch of friends. By the end of the day, my girlfriend and I were the only people left on the field. She shot me mercilessly, and I screamed like a little girl. 30 people watched, 4 people filmed. FML
Today, I went paintballing with my girlfriend and her family. Her dad ended up shooting me, and I doubled over in pain. I thought that was it, until he stepped back and shot me several more times in the stomach. "Just double-tapping," he smirked. More like quadruple-tapping. FML
Today, my girlfriend dragged me along to one of her family's paintball matches. Her father is a former marine, and hates my guts. He kept going well out of his way to hunt me down and pump as many rounds into me as possible without causing a scene. FML
Today, I went to a paintball match with my family and the family of my brother's girlfriend. A few minutes into, my brother's girlfriend's dad snuck up on me, unloaded into me from behind, and snarled, "That's for knocking my daughter up." He got the wrong guy. My back is killing me. FML
Today, I played an intense paintball match, with me and my friends versus my boyfriend and his buddies. When we won, my boyfriend went mental and said he only lost because of "lag". When I pointed out we weren't in a video game, he reacted by firing a paintball straight into my chest. FML
Today, my friends and I went paintballing. The instructor showed us the sound of an unloaded gun by shooting at my face. It wasn't unloaded. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I went shooting. While I was showing him how to properly hold and adjust a rifle, he accidentally pulled the trigger. The gun kicked back and hit me in the face, breaking my nose. FML
Today, I was paintballing when I got shot in the stomach and winded. As I was gasping for breath on the ground, someone came up and shot me point blank in my crotch. FML
Today, while playing paintball, a shot ricocheted off a wall and slammed into my nuts. I told the other team I was out and tried to run out of the field, but as I was jogging to the door I was hit again in the balls. My friend saw this and dropped his gun, laughing. It hit me too. FML
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Top comments
stunty_fml 0
Friendly fire? Isn't.
emer_helena 0
I love how you dont say that you shot her by accident
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Comments (183)
iloveidi0ts 0
#13- Way to be a hardcore feminist :]. Chill, he just wanted to showoff XD. Oh! And speak for yourself- I don't mind a "big, macho, manly guy" :']
chinkeyxsmile 0
lol.
WhEaTgRiNdEr 0
wow man learn how to shoot for shit sake and #13 stop being a feminist peice of shit its ppl like you that make me want to be a sexist asshole
kingez77 0
all hail the mighty protector. but don't let him protect you. he might break your finger too. dumbass.
stlzach 0
this is a bullshit lie. a paintball can not break any bone. unless its like a bone in your inner ear or something. it would have to be EXTREMELY fragile. I paintball every weekend for the past 3 years. A paintball will not break a bone. ever.
mister_moops 0
you're so manly.
Layjin_Nailo 0
How the F did you shoot her finger?! It would have had to been stuck in the freaking barrel lol
Leaveittosteven 0
13 and 14 - shut up. She broke her damn finger from a ball of soft plastic and paint. There's a .02% chance of being injured playing paintball (http://www.paint-ball.org/paintball/safety_report.htm), do you understand? This girl is frail; she needs to be protected. I've been run over by a 4 wheeler, punched in the face like 100 times, and yes, even shot with paintballs, and I've never broken anything. Guess which sex I belong to? Men are stronger than women for reasons you may never understand and would probably deny anyway but have to do with very basic science. Women are also obviously not more independent than men, considering this isn't even a measurable variable and the fact that most women are just conformist fools/daddy's girls.
yehr 0
like SOME guys are machoism confirmists.. you get them everywhere. Societies learning.
lovely997 0
aww that sucks fyl, but at least you had good intentions
kirtan_fml 0
Please stop posting fmls, you lost that right when you started bad mouthing paintball, its damn near impossible to break bone, especially if ur renting (most places keep their renting guns set low)