Anonymous
United States
Today, while I was waiting in line at McDonald's, I found out I can sneeze, pee, and poop all at the same time. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
bglenney
United States
Today, for the first time in my life, I simultaneously sneezed, peed and farted. I was giving a presentation at work when this happened. FML
I have Flashbacks Now
Woonsocket, United States
PTSD
Today, while going to the mall, I witnessed the horror of someone sneezing and shitting themselves at the same time. FML
kinwar
Hamburg, United States
Go big or go home
Today, I sneezed and peed myself while working out at the gym. FML
Anonymous
White Plains, United States
AKA taking a screenshot
Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom
Today, I was waiting for my food at McDonald's. I watched the most obese, sweaty man sneeze into the chips, wipe his nose on his hand and use his hand to shovel chips into a bag. They were my chips. FML
Anonymous
Austin, United States
Hold the line
Today, I was at a restaurant for a quite important business lunch. I really had to go to the bathroom, but there was a queue to the only stall in the whole place, so I decided to just "hold it" and power through. Half an hour later, I sneezed and… didn’t exactly hold it in anymore. I had to excuse myself and leave the restaurant early. FML
Anonymous
United States
Faulty plumbing
Today, after just waking up, I sneezed, which caused me to piss myself. FML
Anonymous
Australia
Let it all out
Today, I was in a meeting with my boss and some new clients when I sensed that I was about to sneeze. I tried to hold it in, but ended up sneezing AND farting. FML
Anonymous
Brisbane, Australia
Too trusting
Today, I tried to stifle a sneeze while on the train and instead shat myself a little bit. FML
monkers
Westlock, Canada
Today, I have such bad diarrhea that every time I sneeze I poop. I've discovered it's very hard to run to the bathroom every time I feel the urge to sneeze. FML
Top comments
rainbowbabe_907 5
Damn, wish I could do that.
RoseCrystal 17
um.....well done?
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Comments (298)
rainbowbabe_907 5
Damn, wish I could do that.
MutherFuther099 0
Don't we all...
Damn_Hippster 11
That's shitty (we we're all thinking it, don't get mad at the pun)
cudi504 4
I really do hate you #9.
Philliesfan9391 3
I hate these shitty puns...
SCREAM4meeee 0
Damn that must have been embarrassing to find out...
ripgeorgecarl1n 7
I'll call the circus.
ohjessica 11
Aw, shit. I'd be pissed atchoo.
FUGYU 2
you must have sneezed the shit out of yourself!!!
nawafm 8
This is call a HD multi purpose
seanders 10
Oh well it probably smelt better than the food.
eurostar710 11
YDI for eating at McDonalds.
cruxx 0
Who gives a shit about what other people think?
BagleHead 6
Funny thing is, that same thing happens to me, but after I eat at mcdonalds!
grad2011 0
#78, I think they just meant that McDonalds is more of a kids place, they didn't mean that the food caused anything...just sayin
I_Hate_Tpyos 0
22- it's not like OP tried to do it. Asshat.
Jdeluxh 12
78- It was a joke.
swinglifeaway123 8
I just lawled so hard.
kyarush 10
You smell of WIN
rognycbro 4
78 i seriously think you are austistic, and if not, then your parents raised you horribly, you socially retarded dumbass.
LiveLaughFML 10
Burger King is going to have it their way and you're going to be McLovin' it.
TwitchingNebula 17
78 you mad bro?
paigeminem 3
^*ed up the mess!! Of cours they didn't clean it up!
nalia18 8
Op-*ahhh ahhhchoooo" Person behind op- "bless ypu si...... Uhm sir" Op- "yes?" Person behind op-" nevermind.."
toastyjustice 5
OP, urine big trouble if you stink up the lobby.
adropofpeace 8
Excuse me, Ice King? Finn and Jake always win. So shut up and have a nice day :) Or have a day like OP's, you deserve it now.
pinkpolarbear 8
Ice_King, seriously dude, chill your **** bro. Better to ignore than to stoop to his level.
eurostar710 11
The YDI is because McDonalds is a disgusting excuse for a restaurant. And what they serve there can only be classified as food by disgusting people who have never eaten real food. McDonalds is not real food, it's chemicals. And it's horrible for you. If you are eating at McDonalds I think ******** and pissing all over yourself because you sneezed is the least of your problems.
eurostar710 11
That was to #78
DynamicDave 11
I'm pissed that I can't do that shit. Bless you if you can, but 'snot really a common skill. Your day may have been pretty crappy, but urine good with those people because you gave them a funny story with which to pepper their conversations. Granted, whether or not that's a good thing Depends on your outhouse, I mean outlook. Oh, and gesunteit.
cj7jeep 1
Lol typical mcdonalds customer
Edie84 0
Pure talent
everyday_normal_ 0
Your in a very shitty situation right now
Awesomehobo44 3
Ya geez I've been trying that for months...
RoseCrystal 17
um.....well done?
Lauren10102 3
Is there a question here? of course it was well done! Could you do that?
msl1333 4
18- Yes it is a pipe.
brunogtz 4
that's ******* AWESOME
Commander223 9
That must be a shitty situation. I bet the people were very snotty about it. I would be so pissed.
SuckItTrolls 7
That's crappy.
Commander223 9
That must be a very shitty situation. The people must have been snotty about it. I would be so pissed.
SimpleMinds_fml 7
Ah come on man don't be pissy. It was a shitty situation, let it go.
kiakia0131 23
Nice try. If people voted it down once before, why post it again? (Unless there is a comment bug, then I retract what I say)
thebeautybleeds 17
Ouch. Well, at least it wasn't some fancy restaurant?
TROLLFACEdotJPG 5
Eating at McDonalds will make him sneeze, pee, poop, and puke all at the same time.
carmieloulou 0
Hahahahahaha this made my day. **** your life.
FunwithBumperCar 0
It's actually a well known side effect from eating mcdonalds but most people don't tend to look past the heart attacks.
Damn_Hippster 11
How'd you manage to do that?
exleonhart 0
He sneezed :(
_Vamp_ 9
It's easy. I found that out at the top of the Ferris Wheel at my local park. Let's just say the people on the bottom weren't too happy...
missyj0 12
Talent and lots of practice.
j_cat187 20
He must of had the 3 bean chili. That poor man.
thatfrenchguy 8
Mcawks
TeamSynergy 1
no mcdonalds puts mc in front of a lot of things on their menu. mc + awks = mcawks
AnagenisisZagus 13
I'm going to take a guess that their comment was a joke, friend....
punkin_26 16
I thought it was a funny joke. I actually do that all the time (put mc before other words) usually as an insult for example Douchy McFuckface or something dumb like that.
NDiesal10 2
I needed a huge McLaugh...thanks...FYL that had to be McEmbarrassing.
tellithowitis 13
Mcfail
melanie177 1
Uhm, eww. That's pretty much disgusting? Yeah.
MeganCello 8
Because they had total control over this mishap. You're pretty much a bitch? Yeah.
exleonhart 0
'MeganCello' she knows a bitch when she meets one. Yeah.
hailphire130 0
Thank you for clarifying that peeing and pooping while standing in line is disgusting. *insert yeah here*
koolkat27 13
83- win.
paigeminem 3
It's not like we all havn't done it at least once!! Admit it! Yeah.
TheSvoloch 5
When you gotta go, you gotta go.
seeb49 7
Nice pic, comrade.
tsmit 4
Ewww lol
supimnyancat 9
What a well thought out and productive comment.
Blueglasscup 18
Bah it's just McDonalds. Probably happens all the time.
ifailplzinsultme 0
Yeah that's how they make the burgers. They sneeze, shit, and pee in it.
JPChiQYaya 0
36 - Imnever going to Mcdonalds again.
MarioDragon 14
-36 Don't care, still tastes good.