Today, while playing paintball, a shot ricocheted off a wall and slammed into my nuts. I told the other team I was out and tried to run out of the field, but as I was jogging to the door I was hit again in the balls. My friend saw this and dropped his gun, laughing. It hit me too. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was paintballing when I got shot in the stomach and winded. As I was gasping for breath on the ground, someone came up and shot me point blank in my crotch. FML
Today, I went paintballing with my girlfriend and her family. Her dad ended up shooting me, and I doubled over in pain. I thought that was it, until he stepped back and shot me several more times in the stomach. "Just double-tapping," he smirked. More like quadruple-tapping. FML
Today, I thought it would be fun to join my friends for a game of paintball. I got shot in the same spot three times in a row. It turned out to be my own team, who mistook me for the enemy because I was wearing… camouflage. FML
Today, I played paintball with a bunch of friends. By the end of the day, my girlfriend and I were the only people left on the field. She shot me mercilessly, and I screamed like a little girl. 30 people watched, 4 people filmed. FML
Today, I went paintballing with my siblings. Once we were done, they realised I hadn't been shot at all. They cornered me in the forest and lit me up. I have welts all over my legs. FML
Today, I played an intense paintball match, with me and my friends versus my boyfriend and his buddies. When we won, my boyfriend went mental and said he only lost because of "lag". When I pointed out we weren't in a video game, he reacted by firing a paintball straight into my chest. FML
Today, my friends and I went paintballing. The instructor showed us the sound of an unloaded gun by shooting at my face. It wasn't unloaded. FML
Today, me and my girlfriend went paintballing. I made sure we were on the same team, so I could protect her and be manly. The first time she got shot was by me, I shot her finger. It broke. FML
Today, we were playing dodgeball at school. I tried to duck and jump around so the idiots on the other team couldn't nail me with the ball. Mid-jump, it tore through the air and smashed straight into my ballsack, sending me curling into a fetal position on the floor. I feel like I got sterilized. FML
Today, I went to a paintball match with my family and the family of my brother's girlfriend. A few minutes into, my brother's girlfriend's dad snuck up on me, unloaded into me from behind, and snarled, "That's for knocking my daughter up." He got the wrong guy. My back is killing me. FML
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Top comments
liferlllllysucks 0
This is such bs
thedwyer96 18
Back when I worked at a park as a ref I saw some girl confront her (now ex) boyfriend about cheating in her. she called him out mid field and unloaded on his junk. We had to kick her out but I felt it was justified.
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Comments (19)
MidnaLink 35
First one was random, second was a dick move, and the third… I'd be screaming after so much pain!
CamBamShamDaMan 26
Why wouldn't u be screaming after the first one??
thedwyer96 18
Back when I worked at a park as a ref I saw some girl confront her (now ex) boyfriend about cheating in her. she called him out mid field and unloaded on his junk. We had to kick her out but I felt it was justified.
MidnaLink 35
Once or twice is understandable, unloading though… chick's got anger issues.
Lalala579121 28
This comment needs a follow up as to how someone cheats on their girlfriend whilst being inside her.
thedwyer96 18
They were out on the field when it happened. It was the 4th game of the day and they showed up separately. She was yelling about how he betrayed her while she was out of town and to be happy with "Katie" then shot the guy from 5 yards away. She unloaded on him and he hit the ground and rolled over onto his stomach so she kept shooting him in the back. But that second part didn't matter to OP'S situation.
DumbAndYoung 30
He totally deserved that.
WeirdUS 30
Cheating sucks but I'm not sure. it could cause severe damage and could involve the police have enough damage is done and hospital bills not justified
Tripartita 45
Sure, it's funny now, but in a few more generations of this, those who possess the "desire to play paintball" gene will be endangered!
Lupanis 0
Always wear a cup when playing paintball. I don't know what it is but every time I have gone it's the one or two people who don't wear a cup who end up taking a hit down there.
Lalala579121 28
I know what it is. Murphy's Law.
Arashikage 18
A game of paintball and a free vasectomy that's a 2 for 1 deal if I ever heard of one.
trucker2 33
By the time your nuts are done swelling you'll have to walk home pushing them in wheel barrel
PapiiChuloo 4
Ive been playing paintball for years and ive never heard of a paintball ricocheting.
species4872 20
Now you know why it's called paint ball (s).
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Yikes! Sounds like people don't want you to reproduce!
r1has 28
OPs friend: What do you mean this isn't what you mean by paint the town red. My friend clearly messaged me to paint the town red while paint balling, and I did just that, paint his downtown red