Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to my cat meowing, with her dilated vagina in my face, giving birth to her first litter of kittens. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I witnessed the miracle of life. More specifically, my cat giving birth on my bed at four in the morning. FML
Today, I got a kitten. She decided to sleep on my bed, waking me up periodically during the night by biting my face to make sure I was still alive. FML
Today, as I was trying to fall asleep, I was jolted awake by my oldest cat who'd decided it would be perfect to power-puke all over my bed. FML
Today, my cat went into labor. This is surprising since 6 years ago, we paid to have her spayed. FML
Today, I woke up to find my cat has gone into heat. Her favorite thing to do right now is sticking her ass in my face and howling like a Nazgûl. FML
Today, I was woken up by my roommates cat meowing so loudly at her door, wanting in. Suddenly it stopped. I was just falling back into sleep when I rolled over and the cat was right there beside my head. Meowing. FML
Today, my cat had the bright idea of giving birth in the dryer, on top of all my new white towels. FML
Today, I woke up in a guy's bed to one of his cats licking my nipples. FML
Today, I was woken up at 5:15 AM to the lovely sounds of my cat barfing in three different places on my bedroom carpet. FML
Today, I had to babysit both my neighbor's 3-year-old daughter and my very pregnant cat. I left the room briefly, only to come back to a traumatized 3-year-old crying in horror as my cat gave birth in front of her. FML
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Top comments
Wiringify 22
She wanted you to be the first to see it.
DocBastard 40
Most guys like pussy in their face. This...not so much.
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Comments (260)
FalconWhitaker 20
This is the most amazing FML I've ever read. I'm sorry for your suffering, but thank you for telling us about it and bringing us such joy.
Warden1986 16
Someone did not watch The Price is Right, growing up. Otherwise you'd know to spray your cats. You would not have to wake up that sight.
davidn 0
Ewwww ickkkk
onorexveritas 24
"catch!"
HeyImMatthew 3
Congratulations, you're a Cather!
Greendaygirl52_fml 3
oh great more kittens to go die in a shelper because there aren't enough homes for them. Spay your cat.
tymarie2012 31
maybe op is a breeder.
BusinessTurtle 8
Oh great, more condescension and assholism based on assumptions.
shutterbug_brit 1
Obviously not or they'd know how to prevent this.
Pigpen181 3
YDI.....Too cheap to have you cat spayed
raraisbang 12
Maybe he/she is a breeder? Some people only want purebred cats, because they're assholes and don't care about the stray ones. Not that I'm agreeing with this; I have a shelter cat myself.
allforus 5
Maybe the cat came to them pregnant.
LittleGreenPaola 23
That's simply disgusting. Nothing else to say.
kitkattgirl 2
FYL 'cause that's not something you want to wake up to right in front of your face. But congrats on the kittens! (Ignore the others that are quick to blame. I'll take the optimistic approach and assume you're a good pet owner.)
alycion 39
It's moments like these that you think maybe Bob Barker was right about spaying your pet.