Today, I woke up in the hospital after my sister saved me from "hanging" myself. In reality, my sister choked me because I ate her last chicken nugget. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was choking on an apple and asked my sister to get me some water. She got some. Then drank it herself. FML
Today, I woke up to my little sister strangling me. My parents accused me of making the red marks on my throat myself to exaggerate how bad it was. She's just "going through a phase", they say, and I'm a bad person for punching her to get her off me. FML
Today, I pretended to have a heart attack so my baby sister would know when to call 911. When I fell down and started to pretend, she drank my soda instead of helping me. FML
Today, while making lunch, I passed out. After waking up in the hospital, my brother yelled at me for leaving the freezer open. FML
Today, I went into my room and found a plastic snake on the floor. I yelled out to my sister, "Good one, Ellen!" I picked up the snake to take it to show her. The snake started moving in my hands and bit me. I had to go to the hospital. FML
Today, my sister asked me to grab her some toilet paper. I refused, so she grabbed my favorite shirt out of the laundry basket and used it to wipe. I was busy icing my sprained ankle. I couldn't walk. She knew this. FML
Today, I heard my sisters fighting downstairs, so I went down to see what all the commotion was about. As I entered the room, one of them picked me up and threw me at the other one. FML
Today, I was sitting on my younger sister's bed while I was on my phone. She came in the room and pushed me off the bed, and I ended up slicing the skin under my eye. Now, my parents are forcing me to pay for the injury for "hanging off the bed". FML
Today, my dog attacked me because I had a chicken costume on for a party. I'm currently in a hospital, dressed as a chicken, waiting for medical assistance. FML
Today, my sister attacked me and stuffed a Tic Tac up my nose. I'm currently in the hospital waiting to have it removed. FML
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Top comments
PhoenixChick 26
If she choked you enough to make you unconscious, then lied about it in such a serious way, report her to every authority you can. That's not sibling rivalry, that's dangerous and mentally unstable.
peckerbeak22 14
Sounds like your sister needs an ass beatin
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Comments (82)
VaporeonMama 8
Jeeze, call the cops, OP.
pharmalady 10
Your sister doesn't need to be going to your aunt and uncle's house, she needs to be eating checked into the hospital herself to deal with her mental issues. Simply going away isn't going to fix any of those. What is going to happen when she comes home for a visit?
LyricaSilvan 30
That is in no way a healthy situation. For her to choke you badly enough or you to end up in the hospital, especially over something so simple, is really bad. Not to mention lying about it and trying to make you sound suicidal. Your sister needs psychological help.
tiredofwaiting 25
I would definitely report her. she needs professional help.
ayyy_bro 26
Don't **** with someone's nugs bruh
IDontKnowaName73 17
Ok well where the ***** the noose at
Lepidop 18
Your sister has been watching too much of 'The Simpsons'
corky1992 33
Your sister needs help
maroneuse 10
Tie her to a chair and make her watch you eat all the chicken nuggets.
Adalricus 1
As a psychologist, I'd say your sister needs help. Please, for everyone's sake, turn her in. She sounds like she might have antisocial personality disorder