Today, I woke up in the hospital after my sister saved me from "hanging" myself. In reality, my sister choked me because I ate her last chicken nugget. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was choking on an apple and asked my sister to get me some water. She got some. Then drank it herself. FML
Today, I woke up to my little sister strangling me. My parents accused me of making the red marks on my throat myself to exaggerate how bad it was. She's just "going through a phase", they say, and I'm a bad person for punching her to get her off me. FML
Today, I pretended to have a heart attack so my baby sister would know when to call 911. When I fell down and started to pretend, she drank my soda instead of helping me. FML
Today, while making lunch, I passed out. After waking up in the hospital, my brother yelled at me for leaving the freezer open. FML
Today, I went into my room and found a plastic snake on the floor. I yelled out to my sister, "Good one, Ellen!" I picked up the snake to take it to show her. The snake started moving in my hands and bit me. I had to go to the hospital. FML
Today, my sister asked me to grab her some toilet paper. I refused, so she grabbed my favorite shirt out of the laundry basket and used it to wipe. I was busy icing my sprained ankle. I couldn't walk. She knew this. FML
Today, I heard my sisters fighting downstairs, so I went down to see what all the commotion was about. As I entered the room, one of them picked me up and threw me at the other one. FML
Today, I was sitting on my younger sister's bed while I was on my phone. She came in the room and pushed me off the bed, and I ended up slicing the skin under my eye. Now, my parents are forcing me to pay for the injury for "hanging off the bed". FML
Today, my dog attacked me because I had a chicken costume on for a party. I'm currently in a hospital, dressed as a chicken, waiting for medical assistance. FML
Today, my sister attacked me and stuffed a Tic Tac up my nose. I'm currently in the hospital waiting to have it removed. FML
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Top comments
PhoenixChick 26
If she choked you enough to make you unconscious, then lied about it in such a serious way, report her to every authority you can. That's not sibling rivalry, that's dangerous and mentally unstable.
peckerbeak22 14
Sounds like your sister needs an ass beatin
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Comments (82)
wow2mylife 25
tell the doctors so you can get the right treatment than let them decided to do with you sisters
farmgirl98 14
It sounds like your parents are taking care of the situation and moving your sister to your aunt and uncle's house, so that's good news. If it were me, I'd also make sure to clear up the facts on your hospital record. You really don't want to have a charted history of a suicide attempt. It can potentially affect future career choices, as well as get you treated differently if ever seen there again (regardless of that being appropriate or not). I know this because I'm a doctor in a small town where word travels VERY quickly, especially when it's regarding mental health "issues".
Calingaladha 21
I dunno where you live, but that sounds like a major HIPAA violation.
Scorpio1691 29
The good thing is it is really easy to prove she lied. rope leaves much different impressions on the skin than her hands. so you can prove she is a lying bitch and needs to be locked away.
NagolNodsae 5
Your right.
acmariner99 25
Reading some of this makes me wonder how the human race manages to survive. Sorry OP ... She needs help ... Or a straight jacket
Wonthebread 20
Somebody needs to see a therapist and it's not the suicidal one
NYGiants1925 22
Slight overreaction.
FenderM 5
Being choked in an act of abuse actually means this person is a serious danger to your life. Abusers who choke or strangle their victims are much more likely to attempt to kill them later. Ask for help to get safe ASAP.
DanielleinDC 34
That's scary. You need to report your sister to the police. This is attempted murder. Maybe I've watched too much CSI or Law and Order, but I'd like to think if a cop got a look at the bruises on your neck, they'd be able to tell the difference between manual strangulation and attempted suicide by hanging. Especially if there's nothing to indicate you tried to hang yourself in your home.
FastTurtle9 14
I'm calling bs on that one.
asdr_is_a_king 5
To be honest you deserved it (Sarcasm)
wow2mylife 25
not the place