Today, I woke up in the hospital after my sister saved me from "hanging" myself. In reality, my sister choked me because I ate her last chicken nugget. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was choking on an apple and asked my sister to get me some water. She got some. Then drank it herself. FML
Today, I woke up to my little sister strangling me. My parents accused me of making the red marks on my throat myself to exaggerate how bad it was. She's just "going through a phase", they say, and I'm a bad person for punching her to get her off me. FML
Today, I pretended to have a heart attack so my baby sister would know when to call 911. When I fell down and started to pretend, she drank my soda instead of helping me. FML
Today, while making lunch, I passed out. After waking up in the hospital, my brother yelled at me for leaving the freezer open. FML
Today, I went into my room and found a plastic snake on the floor. I yelled out to my sister, "Good one, Ellen!" I picked up the snake to take it to show her. The snake started moving in my hands and bit me. I had to go to the hospital. FML
Today, my sister asked me to grab her some toilet paper. I refused, so she grabbed my favorite shirt out of the laundry basket and used it to wipe. I was busy icing my sprained ankle. I couldn't walk. She knew this. FML
Today, I heard my sisters fighting downstairs, so I went down to see what all the commotion was about. As I entered the room, one of them picked me up and threw me at the other one. FML
Today, I was sitting on my younger sister's bed while I was on my phone. She came in the room and pushed me off the bed, and I ended up slicing the skin under my eye. Now, my parents are forcing me to pay for the injury for "hanging off the bed". FML
Today, my dog attacked me because I had a chicken costume on for a party. I'm currently in a hospital, dressed as a chicken, waiting for medical assistance. FML
Today, my sister attacked me and stuffed a Tic Tac up my nose. I'm currently in the hospital waiting to have it removed. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
PhoenixChick 26
If she choked you enough to make you unconscious, then lied about it in such a serious way, report her to every authority you can. That's not sibling rivalry, that's dangerous and mentally unstable.
peckerbeak22 14
Sounds like your sister needs an ass beatin
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (82)
peckerbeak22 14
Sounds like your sister needs an ass beatin
Pathetic_Problem 4
Already on it
AerynX3 10
Sibling rivalry a big thing at your house?
risher01 16
Aren't siblings just fantastic?
smallfeetbigtoes 7
I hope you are spending your time planning your revenge.
PhoenixChick 26
If she choked you enough to make you unconscious, then lied about it in such a serious way, report her to every authority you can. That's not sibling rivalry, that's dangerous and mentally unstable.
Welshite 40
Yup. My sister tried to kill me twice by strangulation, and nearly succeeded the second time. And all because I was looking at her pack of stickers. She's still 100% certified insane as an adult.
Transwiththeplan 4
Update from original poster; told parents. Laughed at me, before I started to cry. Suddenly, they realise I'm not joking. So, my sister might (although I'm one hundred percent sure will) be living with my aunt and uncle.
Joshawott 21
It's a real shame they didn't believe you at first, but at least it seems like they've come around and realised who was clearly at fault. I hope things work out for you OP. I mean, I can understand getting a little irked by someone eating your last chicken nugget, but to choke them enough to warrant a hospital visit? There's so over the line that I don't think they can see it any more.
Morigyn 9
It's good that she won't be able to hurt you anymore, but I sincerely hope you press charges. My brother did the same to me and I've regretted not pressing charges ever since, he got to hurt a lot more people after me. Please, please don't let her do the same.
RosaMaravillosa 10
agreed, that's is a very dangerous situation.
leafynitemare 24
Couldn't avoid liking your comment. While I definitely agree, I rarely vote on comments. My OCD told me I had to add a like to bring your number of likes to 666. Sorry not sorry.
childproofpizza 19
My sister tried to strangle me with an extension cord, right as I was blacking out I elbowed her in the face. She didn't get in trouble but I did.
chosha_fml 27
Set that record straight ASAP. What a bitch!
khadishja 12
your sister must be very passionate about her chicken nuggets.
scyth3s 13
*chokin nuggets
soulreaper12296 28
Please tell me that you told someone what actually happened. She obviously needs help if she choked you so bad that you needed to go to a hospital all because of a chicken nugget; and you don't need to be there with people constantly keeping an eye on you because they think you tried killing yourself.
Bearsmomma 30
see #15-Joshawott scratch that....it disappeared
Bearsmomma 30
annnd, it's back but with a different name.
Skycop_S 23
Next time wear a collar with spikes and eat all her nuggets
Calingaladha 21
Jesus, if she'd do that for a chicken nugget, I'd hate to see what she's willing to do for a Klondike bar. But seriously, tell someone.