Today, I woke up in the hospital after my sister saved me from "hanging" myself. In reality, my sister choked me because I ate her last chicken nugget. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was choking on an apple and asked my sister to get me some water. She got some. Then drank it herself. FML
Today, I woke up to my little sister strangling me. My parents accused me of making the red marks on my throat myself to exaggerate how bad it was. She's just "going through a phase", they say, and I'm a bad person for punching her to get her off me. FML
Today, I pretended to have a heart attack so my baby sister would know when to call 911. When I fell down and started to pretend, she drank my soda instead of helping me. FML
Today, while making lunch, I passed out. After waking up in the hospital, my brother yelled at me for leaving the freezer open. FML
Today, I went into my room and found a plastic snake on the floor. I yelled out to my sister, "Good one, Ellen!" I picked up the snake to take it to show her. The snake started moving in my hands and bit me. I had to go to the hospital. FML
Today, my sister asked me to grab her some toilet paper. I refused, so she grabbed my favorite shirt out of the laundry basket and used it to wipe. I was busy icing my sprained ankle. I couldn't walk. She knew this. FML
Today, I heard my sisters fighting downstairs, so I went down to see what all the commotion was about. As I entered the room, one of them picked me up and threw me at the other one. FML
Today, I was sitting on my younger sister's bed while I was on my phone. She came in the room and pushed me off the bed, and I ended up slicing the skin under my eye. Now, my parents are forcing me to pay for the injury for "hanging off the bed". FML
Today, my dog attacked me because I had a chicken costume on for a party. I'm currently in a hospital, dressed as a chicken, waiting for medical assistance. FML
Today, my sister attacked me and stuffed a Tic Tac up my nose. I'm currently in the hospital waiting to have it removed. FML
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Top comments
PhoenixChick 26
If she choked you enough to make you unconscious, then lied about it in such a serious way, report her to every authority you can. That's not sibling rivalry, that's dangerous and mentally unstable.
peckerbeak22 14
Sounds like your sister needs an ass beatin
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Comments (82)
pscool 11
Sorry 0P but you definitely need to get this straightened out in your medical record! Make sure you double check!! If not it could seriously come back to bite you in the future! Try and get a gun permit in five years, or a federal job with something like that on your record! Happened to a friend of mine, one of his buddies back in high school called and said he tried to kill himself police came and took him to the hospital. The hospital immediately released him and it has haunted him ever since.
lilithfury 23
Press charges. She could have killed you, and tried to cover it up as a suicide attempt.
Brain_fart 20
Wait...you ate her last chicken nugget?!
DackyTaffy 9
As someone who grew up with the inner rage your sister has, I am truly sorry you've endured it, and that she lied on top of it all. She can get better, but you need to stay the hell away from her for a very long time, for both of you to heal. You don't need to forgive or forget, but know that it was never your fault. Her rage is her own environment and her own problem.
Flyndaran 10
I'm afraid that I find this highly suspect. Who nearly dies from attempted murder only to go on a light hearted anonymous internet site to joke about it? If true, then that's some serious PTSD denial going on. If false, then OP needs to grow up.
mynoch 7
I voted "you did it to yourself" because you need to separate yourself from the harmful situation immediately, not post about it on fml. Seriously, you need to not be in that situation, immediately.
Zebediabolical 45
Taking someone's chicken nuggets is bad. But I'm curious as to why you'd think taking their last nug would end well.
cj89898 24
Man the LAST chicken nugget!? **** you. No but seriously she needs mental help and to be reported to authorities.
BurgundyInk13 9
I'm glad your parents are taking you seriously. Please, please also tell your doctors. Knowing this was abuse and not a suicide attempt will change their treatment plan. You need to be taken care of, and to be kept WELL away from her. I wish you all the best.
Witchylady 18
She sounds mentally unstable and full of rage. She needs therapy