Today, it was my first day closing alone at a pet store when a lady came in wanting to return a bird she bought months ago. Once I informed her there were no returns on livestock, she let the bird free and ran out the door, leaving me to catch it and explain to my manager where it came from. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, a client walked into my store with a duck in her hands. I had to explain to her that she couldn't bring the bird shopping with her. We got a 1-star review. FML
Today I bought a new cage, along with some toys, for my bird. I came home to find my bird had escaped its old cage. FML
Today, I saved a baby bird from the site I work on. It was the runt and did not have any feathers and was neglected by the mother. I took care of it all day at work and planned on taking it to a wildlife reserve after work. Two minutes away from the reserve, we hit a pothole and I dropped it. It died. FML
Today, I got yelled at by my boss for being insensitive to a customer. I'd told her I never heard of the requested item even existing. She walked off shouting, screaming and throwing stuff from the shelf. She wanted to order a bird feeder with heated perches so the bird's feet won't get cold. FML
Today, after three weeks of holding out, my stingy boss finally called animal control about the birds in the air vent above the register. While I was working, they rummaged through the vents, causing live maggots to fall down right in front of me. FML
Today, at my job at a pet store, my boss told me to go outside and hand out flyers. I saw a man sitting on a bench and walked up, saying, "Hi! Do you have a pet?" He teared up and said, "I just put her down this morning." FML
Today, I saved a bird from being run over as it lay in the middle of the road. Thinking it had a broken wing or something, I started carrying it home, intending to take it to the vet later. It crapped in my hand and flew away. FML
Today, I spent twenty minutes trying to shoo a bird out of my apartment. After finally getting it outside, I closed the window, turned around, and realized I'd locked myself out instead. The bird flew away. I didn't. FML
Today, I was caring for a bird that had flown into my window. I thought the poor thing wouldn't make it, when it shit in my hand, flew into my neck, then around my living room for ages before I could manage to get it out of the window. FML
Today, after months of trying to persuade her to give it to a wildlife rescue, I reported my stepmother to the authorities for illegally keeping an endangered bird in the kitchen. When they took it, she screamed that I had no right to do that, as she considered it hers since she found it. FML
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Top comments
Bano360 25
Oh retail, how I hate thee.
MBSC 11
At least she didn't try to return a dead bird?
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Comments (81)
jojj351 12
am I the only one who thought of twenty bird and the grandma reading this?
cmayer 20
Tweety bird?
etishuman22 32
Damn you, autocorrect!
Gingerette 8
Auto correct is my mortal enemy.
Chellec2013 28
Tweety bird or one and twenty blackbirds baked in a pie?
False_Stupidity 42
Isn't it four and twenty blackbirds?
newburton13 26
A "cat out of the bag" pun doesn't really work here, does it?
Pleonasm 36
You know what they say: A bird in the pet shop is worth two in the cage.
flockz 20
coming up with bird puns is hard. maybe i'll just wing it.
GEFStryker 29
I totally tweeted this.
martin8337 36
What a birdbrain, leaving her bird at the pet shop and not getting her money back.
Bano360 25
Oh retail, how I hate thee.
Beepbeep7 14
Wow.Sounds like that lady was lacking in common sense.Sorry OP.
Roskie 16
Something seems wrong here.I feel like there's some punctuation error.Does anyone else see this?
JaegerMayCry 13
What I am asking myself is what she expected to gain from this. She lost both a bird and money. Not a lot of thinking on her part
iSmellMusic 8
56 - She probably just wanted to get rid of the bird and see if she could get money back. In frustration of not getting her money back, she released the bird. PS - Love the username!
seacadet 18
well, time to release a Doberman on her XD.
MBSC 11
At least she didn't try to return a dead bird?
harperska 10
It definitely sounded like a Monty Python pet shop sketch set up to me.
xx000o 27
At least you didn't refund her money.
tommylover842 23
78 are you the bird that got returned? If so i can see how you'd be sore about it and not want your previous owner's money refunded.
Sputnikspak 13
He isn't pining for the fjords.
miroku000 5
It sounds like she was brilliant.
zandalee 20
Damn bird probably kept waking her up at some ungodly hour tweeting and shit...
skilova4lifezzz 19
Where's Sylvester when you need him?
skilova4lifezzz 19
Tweety always ends up taking cover in the cage eventually.
skilova4lifezzz 19
Either way, tweety ends up in the cage.
perdix 31
At least she didn't bring back a dead parrot. "Pining for the fjords?!!!"
Blazinthatshit 9
Is that a Monty Python reference I see? :D
perdix 31
#27, nudge, nudge, grin, grin, wink, wink, know what I mean, know what I mean?
blackonblight 33
Well, she hadn't nailed it to the perch so...
Pleonasm 36
The pecking order goes like this: The owner, the manager, the customer, the bird, then you.