Today, while making lunch, I passed out. After waking up in the hospital, my brother yelled at me for leaving the freezer open. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I felt dizzy and light-headed. So I sat down at the top of my stairs calling my brother who was downstairs, for help because I was scared something was wrong with me. He called back "No, I'm eating." I fainted. When I woke up, I was still alone upstairs and he was still eating downstairs. FML
Today, my brother accidentally hit me in the throat. After I stopped coughing, choking, and feeling like I was going to die, he came back into my room, quietly said "I know your weakness," and left. FML
Today, I went snowboarding and fell backwards, hitting my head on a patch of ice. When I got home, I told my brother I thought I might have a concussion. He told me I should be a man and suck it, swiftly smacking my head, causing me to pass out. FML
Today, I don't know which is worse: my brother cramming all his sauce bottles into a fridge door shelf that exploded onto the floor when I opened the fridge, or my mother being mad at me because I was upset about slicing open my finger while cleaning up the broken glass and my hand now burns. FML
Today, at work, the chest freezer was accidentally turned off. I work at a vet and the freezer is our morgue. It got opened before anyone realized the contents had thawed. FML
Today, I made my brother go to the grocery store to get some frozen pizzas. Ten minutes after he left, the power cut out. Still no power. Still hungry. FML
Today, I opened the freezer for some Poptarts and a giant block of meat fell and broke my toe. FML
Today, my brother flicked a huge bug onto my foot, making me freak out and fall into my outdoors pool. The water was so cold that I started hyperventilating. My brother left to "get help". I finally managed to get out, and found him watching TV. FML
Today, while washing the dishes at work I was told to go put some things into the big freezer at the back of the store. While doing so, the door closed behind me, so naturally I pushed it, only to have my wet hands freeze to the door. I yelled to my manager for 10 minutes before help came. FML
Today, I was craving a cold Coke, so I grabbed one from the freezer where I had put it to chill quickly. As soon as I opened it, the can exploded all over me and the kitchen. I spent the next hour cleaning sticky residue off the floor, surrounding furniture, and even the ceiling. FML
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Top comments
SpaceToast 25
Yell at your brother for being a crappy sibling.
RichardPencil 32
You need to focus on what’s really important here: Did your brother get his lunch?
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Comments (13)
Shahdz 5
Lol
RichardPencil 32
You need to focus on what’s really important here: Did your brother get his lunch?
SpaceToast 25
Yell at your brother for being a crappy sibling.
deezespuds 3
Jeeze harsh
LEbleuDESreves 10
do not make lunch anymore. problem solved ? (on a more serious note: tell your brother to go **** himself if he cares more about that than your statue of health. take care darling)
Bubbles77777 11
haha haha haha haha haha haha haha :) :) :) :) literally made me laugh out loud. Hope ur okay:) :)
Selene1090 26
Are you high...??
Bubbles77777 11
No I'm not, I don't smoke but maybe u need to since u can't see the humor in what happened. It's funny that op brother yelled@ op for leaving the freezer open instead of asking was op okay. Get a sense of humour.
Druu 53
So insensitive! Aren't you aware how much frozen groceries cost nowadays??
Druu 53
So insensitive! Aren't you aware how much frozen groceries cost nowadays??
RichardPencil 32
Or what dead animals smell like if allowed to thaw.
J352SAURUS 30
Well that was rude, Sam! Hope you're okay OP.
ArbiterOfFML 24
Punch him in the gonads.