Today, I went into my room and found a plastic snake on the floor. I yelled out to my sister, "Good one, Ellen!" I picked up the snake to take it to show her. The snake started moving in my hands and bit me. I had to go to the hospital. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I visited my grandma. Shortly after I arrived, she freaked out after finding a "snake" in her closet. It was a rubber snake that my brother must have put there yesterday as a prank. I picked it up and told her it was fake. She then yelled at me for playing such a disgusting prank on her. FML
Today, I woke up to an angry snake trying to climb the leg of my bed. My bedroom was closed all day yesterday. It must have gotten in my room days ago. FML
Today, it was my first day being home after doing a 4 and a half month hike through the Appalachian Trail. This evening, I stepped out my front door and directly onto a copperhead snake. It thought my leg was tasty, and I went to the ER for the first time in over 20+ years. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to cure me of my snake phobia by buying one. When he took it out of the cage, it bit him. Now he's terrified of them too. Even worse, he dropped the snake, so it's now loose in our house. FML
Today, I was running outside. On the last mile, I was alongside some fields. While running down the side of the road, I glanced down and saw a snake. I was so startled I jumped left in front of a car, screaming like a girl. The snake was dead. FML
Today, my son's glasses were missing. My bathroom is not well lit, but I noticed something sticking out from under the toilet seat. I excitedly grabbed it, thinking I saw the band of the glasses. Nope, it was a snake. FML
Today, I was spending some time alone out in the countryside, when I glanced at my boot. I saw a snake, screamed, ran like hell for my car, tripped over my own feet, and smashed my kneecaps. Upon further inspection, I realized the "snake" was my loose shoelace. FML
Today, I thought it'd be funny to knee my sister's ass as she was bending over. What I didn't realise was that she was trying to pick up a spider. In shock, she threw it in the air and it landed on my chest. I ran into a wall trying to get it off. FML
Today, I had to chase off the Eastern Brown snake that's been hanging around. When it doubled back, I fell over trying to move out of its way and landed in a bush that contained 3 separate wasp nests. My body feels like it is on fire and the snake is now in my chook shed, refusing to leave. FML
Today, I was with my kids. We saw a tiny little bug and they started freaking out. Trying to show them that bugs are not scary, I picked it up. It bit me and now I have to go to the doctor because my hand is the size of a balloon. FML
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Top comments
Peroxide 3
I was camping and out late riding my bike when something got caught in my spokes and was going round and round. It was dark and I thought it was a stick so I reached down to pull it out and it hissed at me. Needless to say I dismounted faster than the speed of light thus proving Einstein wrong. Shove that in your pipe and smoke it!! E=mcgetthefuckoutofmybikesnake
Kingdutch 3
That'd scare the ---- out of me O.o FYL
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Comments (94)
crzyry 6
lol, not very bright are you?
sexxxtacy 0
nope he isnt very smart at all. plus you thought she did it so you showed it to her??? why??
talk_fml 0
i think it makes alot of sense. whenever my sis or i did something sneaky like that (a fake snake) we would take it to the other person with a "you can do better than that" kind of attitude. i think this fml is pretty funny but sucks for the OP. and its reasonable that they wouldnt think the snake was real; they were indoors!
AziraLevana 2
OP's very lucky. Here in Australia, we have something like nine of the world's ten most venomous snakes.
iiNsTinK 0
epic fail. i wanna see this on video. it would be very very funny to watch.
Kingdutch 3
That'd scare the ---- out of me O.o FYL
subwoofa 0
Always the sisters fault
its_me_haha 0
bahahah somethin like that happen to me.. only i knew it was not rubber and it was in my living room...but i did not pick it up.... i aint scared of snakes but i dont just go pickin them up...
Kylias 6
Except that they found a snake in their house. :|
danab_fml 0
#53 WINN!!!
Dr_Pepper_fml 3
...wow, the FMLs have sucked lately....
echo89 0
yea they have, but that because people think that every little thing in their life is an FML moment when really it's them being babies...
nokillnobeepbeep 0
Hmmm? Clearly this FML bites, it doesn't suck. *Dot dot dot, death by ellipsis, dot dot dot* Duh!
horse_lvr96 0
yes they have
PeopleRSoDumb 0
... You had to go to the hospital. For that. Cause you didn't see if it was real? YDI, and go to MLIA.
rawrsaur19 0
Well, if I got bit by a snake, I'd go to the hospital. NSW is full of deady snakes, all of Australia is. We got deadly spiders, fish, jellies and more too. F OP's life.
COBRAMORPH 0
So what, you handled it like you thought it was a ****? Did you put it in your mouth? ****.
waterynuggets 0
Someone's repressed.
Lia_Mackenzie 4
Freud would have a field day with you, Cobramorph. You need to get laid.
Asstazztic 8
hahaha fricken COBRAMORPH that's hilarious :P lol
cerebellum_fml 0
That's what she said....
Asstazztic 8
sorry cerebellum but that wasn't good at all :/
Peroxide 3
I was camping and out late riding my bike when something got caught in my spokes and was going round and round. It was dark and I thought it was a stick so I reached down to pull it out and it hissed at me. Needless to say I dismounted faster than the speed of light thus proving Einstein wrong. Shove that in your pipe and smoke it!! E=mcgetthefuckoutofmybikesnake
nickownes1 3
That's probably the best comment I've ever seen..
dolphinlvr7 24
Agreed