Today, I went to my girlfriend's house for the first time. I had to use the restroom, and when I came back, I mocked her brothers' lame Pokémon shower curtain and Ninja Turtle towels. Turns out they were hers. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I sneaked into my girlfriend's house for some romantic time. Before going into her room, I took a dump in the bathroom. Once I was done, I not only noticed that there was no toilet paper left, but I heard her and her 6'5, heavyweight boxer, ex-marine father, talking outside the bathroom door. FML
Today, I waited for my girlfriend to get in the shower before I stripped down to try and seduce her. I got ready, threw open the door and went in. I walked in on her taking a dump. FML
Today, I took a shower at my girlfriend's apartment. I was wandering around, gathering my clothes when I noticed my girl doing her hair in the other room. She looked sort of peculiar, so I stood there, studying her. Half naked. I then realized it wasn't my girlfriend, but her roommate. FML
Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus." FML
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to sneak into the shower at her house while her parents went out to eat and a movie. Half way through our shower we heard a knocking at the door, it was her mom. We had left all of our clothes downstairs. Safe to say I won't be allowed there any more. FML
Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to my parents, until we found my mother waving around a wooden sword, and my father trying to shove my sister into the dryer. FML
Today, I let my boyfriend sleep over at my house for the first time. Upon arriving, he tossed his stuff on the floor and said "I gotta take a piss, where's your shower?" FML
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. I really had to use the bathroom, but decided to wait. After about an hour, I went to the restroom. I pissed for so long that when I walked out her family all started clapping. FML
Today, I visited my girlfriend's apartment for the first time. I guess she forgot to do some spring cleaning before I showed up, because I saw my laptop on her couch. The same laptop that was stolen from my house along with several other valuables last week. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was coming over for a surprise visit. I quickly tidied up, but not before shoving all my dirty laundry under the bed. When she arrived, she brought her dog in. Her dog immediately sniffed out the laundry and dragged my most embarrassing underwear into the living room while her parents watched. FML
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Top comments
f_alltheirlives 3
Appreciate an awesome girlfriend you stupid COW!(ABUNGA)
passwordis_fml 2
don't mock the ninja turtles..
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Comments (102)
Intoxicunt 6
I would do that too. Eh. Why would you mock someone's brother's belongings to their face? Lame. Make her new towels out of special beautiful silk that only everyone but her can see...
rukusrazor 0
I think you've got that backwards. Mocking someone behind their back is gutless and weak. (allbeit funny) *subby and girlfriend could be young, they don't say*
kiit_fml 0
Douche :P Everyone makes fun of my little mermaid towel.. but hey, I'd rather have something I like even if other people don't approve. What's lame to you isn't lame to someone else.
moonlight_daze 8
YDI for making fun of other people's tastes. YDI even more for mocking your girlfriend's little brother. Most girl's don't like that, ya know? And it turned out to be hers? That's even worse. Fail, fail and fail again..
g00nie 0
I think #16 said everything that needs to be said
redbluegreen 41
Agreed. People look at how you treat and speak of others. No one likes a douche. And anyway, you dissed her in the end. You deserve it.
DrunkenValor 0
Hah, looks like the OP won't be having a pokebattle on that bed tonight.
term3186 1
Pffft. **** the OP. Ninja Turtles ******* rock.
Athabaska 10
Don't worry about it dude, you wouldn't want to date a chick like that. Find someone into GI Joe, and Thundercats and you'll have a winner
f_alltheirlives 3
Now we know the OP does not deserve awesome girlfriends. AND KNOWING IS...
RubixMonkey 0
Did she ever ask you to be her He-man in bed? If yes then you are dating a nerd who is also cute. You wouldn't date her if she was ugly or your suspected she had weird tastes you didn't like. I mean hell, cute girls are not allowed to like anything boys like. I mean she might have an obsession with comics that is contagious. Cause Nerdism is so much worse than her being a *****. Just cause you don't like it doesn't mean she can't. And also, who gives you the right to rag on her brother.
ohheykiwi 2
You are a dumbass. You had a great girl and you were too dumb to appreciate it.
skybeau 0
Wow...I'm 21 and I still love pokemon and Ninja Turtles!! I'm seriously tempted to buy some new bathroom decor now :) OP - YDI for criticising someone else's brothers. I assume you and this girl hadn't been dating long or you would probably have realised that she at least has an appreciation for those 'childish' things. Her breaking up with you sucks, but if you're gonna criticise her brothers just because they have TMNT towels, or pokemon on the shower curtain, you're probably not the kind of guy I'd wanna date either.
RubixMonkey 0
Yeah for all he knew the mom bought the towels or they were a gift someone got thinking they liked those things. I have a friend who wears these awful sweaters to school to this day just because his grandmother makes them and he wants to make her happy.
redbluegreen 41
I'm probably the only one who thought of Buster Casey while reading your responce.
RubixMonkey 0
LOLz, no he has been called that. His names Brian though.
redbluegreen 41
Do you know of what I speak of?
RubixMonkey 0
Yes, Rant the novel.
kayeeeeee 0
Ohh myy goodd! How could yu diss a ninga turtle? :O YDI Bigg timee - esp for also trying to insult her brother, that's slackk, I hope you die.
artsavage13 0
Way to go losing what could be the world's greatest girlfriend.
Nakedsquirrel 5
What kind of weiner doesn't like TMNT? I'm in my mid-20s and there's not a single guy my age I know that doesn't agree they were the shit back then, and that TMNT 2 (Arcade), Manhattan Project, and Turtles in Time were awesome video games. You must either be 16 and grew up in the era where all forms of entertainment started to nosedive, or me. Or both.