Today, I went to a bar with two guys I was interested in. The first I'd been trying to go out with all semester. The second I had gone to dinner with and he seemed nice. I was the designated driver. They drank too much and, on the way home, hooked up in the back seat. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I finally went on a date with the girl I'm in love with. After dinner we went to the bar for drinks and things were going great. Right up until she went home with another guy. FML
Peter and Pan
Today, after a great double date with my best friend and two really hot guys, we went back to my place. My friend and I left the guys in the living room to go grab some more wine. When we came back, we found our dates making out with each other on the couch. FML
Today, I went out drinking with my friends. Being safe as we were a little intoxicated, we took a taxi back. The cab driver was also drunk. FML
Today, I went out with my ex-boyfriend on a date. The night consisted of me sitting in the back seat of his friend's truck while they drove around to pick up things for the party they were going to have that same night. After they picked everything up, he asked where I wanted to get dropped off. FML
Today, I got stood up by all five of my friends. I had to spend two hours getting hit on by a guy because I didn't feel safe to drive home. Their excuse? They didn't think I was serious when I said I was already at the bar. FML
Today, my mom took me to a bar to cheer me up after being dumped. Two cute guys around my age kept looking over at us the whole night. When I told my mom, she said she was going to get them to come talk to me. Instead, she ended up leaving with both of them. FML
Next
Today, I took a girl out on a date. We had dinner, we had good conversation, the vibe was excellent, and everything was great. I took her to a bar I frequent after for a couple of drinks to finish the night. She left with some other dude on his motorcycle. FML
Today, I met a hot guy at the bar and we hit it off instantly. After a few drinks, he called a cab for us. When it arrived, I seducingly asked, "My place or yours?" He responds, "Both. I'll go to mine and you go to yours" and walked away. The cab driver laughed the whole way home. FML
Today, I met a girl at a bar. After buying her a few drinks, we decided to head back to her place. Not wanting to leave either of our cars, I followed her home. While driving, she sent me text because she missed her exit. I tried to text her back something witty and instead rear ended her. FML
Cheers
Today, I went out drinking with a friend I've been crushing on for a while now. After we'd been talking and had a few, she said, "Man, I haven't gotten laid in months! Do you mind?" Surprised but hopeful, I nodded. She leaned over, hugged me, and went to hit on a guy by the bar. FML
Top comments
YerPal 0
That's so hot!
Gringo_fml 0
Threesome?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (138)
mrfrank505 0
Sad :-( Hate when that happens!
alex_vik 1
#45 - Where did you get the idea that I wasn't a homophobe?
Tigro_fml 0
OMG guyz, some people fall in love with guys because they cant help it. and with time become more attracted to the person. You cant help the way you feel about someone.. and the 1 guy probably brought 2 guys he liked, hoping that maybe 1 of them were gay, to find out that they were both gay making out in the back seat.
jjjeah 0
That's hot. And also, homosexuality is perfectly normal, but I refuse to debate this. However, 59 - um, sorry, I don't know about all the other guys on your list, but Gaius Julius Caesar was not openly gay. He may not have been gay at all - it's not coincidental that rumours of a possible tryst with King Nicomedes of Bithynia (with whom he did have a good friendship) were perpetuated mostly by his political rivals. Even if the affair had indeed happen, Caesar continually denied it, exploding publicly in the face of this 'slander'. This combined with his numerous flings with women (which are documented solidly as fact, as opposed to this Nicomedes thing) would make him a closeted bisexual AT BEST. He was never linked to another man after this either, so I'd say the chances are low that he was homosexual. It's kind of ridiculous to say that he was gay just because there was a lot of homosexual sex going on at the time. There was a lot of drinking going on too, but it's also a known fact that he limited his alcohol intake. I am by no means homophobic. I am bisexual myself. But I will not stand for your bending of history to fit your own agenda. There is no historical evidence to even support such a claim. As a history major, this disgusts me.
Victoria2103 0
You kind of deserve it. That's what you get for trying to get with 2 guys and taking them both out. Also. Never be the designated driver. You're basically asking to be the third wheel.
arby 0
@42, I've done that :) Twas quite fun btw, I didn't vote either way. You should have had a threesome!
laurisshnazzy 0
#63, it makes absolutely no difference. You're an idiot. A bigoted one, at that.
ganjaman_fml 0
This would have been so much funnier if your name wasnt sad_gay
sodaxpopxhiccups 0
#65 - I clap to you. I was going to make the comment that it is in fact "sickening" and not "sicking," but you beat me to it. Haha. To all you ******* homophobes, get over yourselves. Seriously? Believe what you want. Go ahead and be closed minded, but that's only going to ruin the world. If people weren't so ******* closed minded, then maybe there wouldn't be as much hate and war in the world. Honestly name one war that wasn't because of closed minded people who were not able to accept any kind of compromise. You can't. It's impossible. Even the Holocaust was caused by Hitler, who was closed minded against the Jews. Just like you are against homosexuals. You're never going to get rid of them, and you're never going to be able to avoid them. So either learn to deal with them, or keep your ignorant and unwanted comments to your self. Love is unlimited, and it shouldn't matter who loves who. You can't help who you love. That goes without saying. I bet that only a handful of people in the world can honestly say that they haven't loved someone they wish they hadn't loved, or that they loved someone they knew they shouldn't before they fell for them. So shut up and learn to have an open mind to all kind of things, assholes. To the OP: I'm terribly sorry that this happened to you. It's not fair for that to happen to anyone. D: Truly, FYL, and I hope you have better luck next time.
Flargon 0
Haha nice