Today, I went to a bar with two guys I was interested in. The first I'd been trying to go out with all semester. The second I had gone to dinner with and he seemed nice. I was the designated driver. They drank too much and, on the way home, hooked up in the back seat. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I finally went on a date with the girl I'm in love with. After dinner we went to the bar for drinks and things were going great. Right up until she went home with another guy. FML
Today, after a great double date with my best friend and two really hot guys, we went back to my place. My friend and I left the guys in the living room to go grab some more wine. When we came back, we found our dates making out with each other on the couch. FML
Today, I went out drinking with my friends. Being safe as we were a little intoxicated, we took a taxi back. The cab driver was also drunk. FML
Today, I went out with my ex-boyfriend on a date. The night consisted of me sitting in the back seat of his friend's truck while they drove around to pick up things for the party they were going to have that same night. After they picked everything up, he asked where I wanted to get dropped off. FML
Today, I got stood up by all five of my friends. I had to spend two hours getting hit on by a guy because I didn't feel safe to drive home. Their excuse? They didn't think I was serious when I said I was already at the bar. FML
Today, my mom took me to a bar to cheer me up after being dumped. Two cute guys around my age kept looking over at us the whole night. When I told my mom, she said she was going to get them to come talk to me. Instead, she ended up leaving with both of them. FML
Today, I took a girl out on a date. We had dinner, we had good conversation, the vibe was excellent, and everything was great. I took her to a bar I frequent after for a couple of drinks to finish the night. She left with some other dude on his motorcycle. FML
Today, I met a hot guy at the bar and we hit it off instantly. After a few drinks, he called a cab for us. When it arrived, I seducingly asked, "My place or yours?" He responds, "Both. I'll go to mine and you go to yours" and walked away. The cab driver laughed the whole way home. FML
Today, I met a girl at a bar. After buying her a few drinks, we decided to head back to her place. Not wanting to leave either of our cars, I followed her home. While driving, she sent me text because she missed her exit. I tried to text her back something witty and instead rear ended her. FML
Today, I went out drinking with a friend I've been crushing on for a while now. After we'd been talking and had a few, she said, "Man, I haven't gotten laid in months! Do you mind?" Surprised but hopeful, I nodded. She leaned over, hugged me, and went to hit on a guy by the bar. FML
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Top comments
YerPal 0
That's so hot!
Gringo_fml 0
Threesome?
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Comments (138)
Ohnoitslindsay 0
#39 why is it wrong exactly?
zachary918 0
Aw, why'd you take them both out at the same time? Sigh, I think most of us have been in this situation at one point or another. Straight people will never understand. But hey, at least it wasn't the guy you like hooking up with your ex! (Another thing straight people will never get... lol)
alex_vik 1
It took me about 40 seconds to realize that OP was a gay too. Those were a very confusing 40 seconds.
Hummingbird114 0
You people are annoying me. He wasn't dating both guys at once, he was interested in both and trying to get at least one of them to like him the same way. But until someone shows more interest, what's the problem with having options? And in the same vein, why are you people making such a big deal about the guys being gay? Get over it! If you don't like it, don't comment, but don't waste post space just to spread around hateful homophobic crap. Assholes. *ahem* OP, I feel very sorry for you, and hope that you have much better luck in the future.
ttonks007 0
#43: because NONE of those things EVER happen to straight people. whether you realize it or not, you're doing the same thing that the stereotypical "homophobe" does to gay people. get out of the box, okay? OP: this post is the pinnacle of the FML art form. nicely done. indeed, FYL.
pokipoki 0
i had to read through comments before i realized that OP was gay. lol. either way it sucked for OP. and nothing's wrong in being gay.
yourpathetic 0
#41, umm, the asshole is an exit only. and its pretty sicking. if you like for people to pound you there, by all means enjoy it, but its sick.
Ohnoitslindsay 0
The OP's sexuality really has nothing to do with the story at all.
Bmlacme 3
So, I hate most of you. I am not gay, but anyone who is still this against gay people needs to go play in traffic. They are just like everyone else. So get over it. OP: I am sorry that happened to you!! I hope things work out!!
yourpathetic 0
#49 go pound sand, no one likes you either :)