Today, I was horsing around after my big test. Someone punched me softly on my back. Figuring it was my friend, I turned around and did a roundhouse kick. It was my girlfriend. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house, and she was tickling me. It got a bit rough, and she fell out of bed and hit the floor. Her parents, thinking we'd been fighting, burst into the room to see her holding her bloody nose. She didn't say anything while her dad kicked my ass. FML
Today, I was walking my girlfriend to class when my friend came by and playfully punched me in the arm. Trying not to look like a wimp, I turned around to hit him in the arm. Instead, I ended up punching a girl in the face. Now my girlfriend won't talk to me and I'm suspended. FML
Today, my girlfriend's ex punched me so hard in the face, I couldn't see straight. But I got up anyway. I lunged at him, and nailed him in the jaw. Turns out I'd in fact just knocked out my girlfriend the on-looker. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML
Today, my girlfriend snuck up behind me to cover my eyes and play "guess who." The second her hands touched my face, I grabbed her, twisted her wrists, and kneed her to the floor out of instinct. FML
Today, I was woken up by my dog touching my foot, so I tried to push it away. Then I realized that I'd kicked my girlfriend in the face. FML
Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML
Today, My girlfriend came from behind me and put her hand in my back pockets. I though it was someone trying to take my wallet, I elbowed her in the nose and broke it. FML
Today, I was kicked in the crotch. The girl who did it thought I was her ex-boyfriend. I'm a girl. FML
Today, I was showing some new karate moves in the park to my friends. I mimed a punch behind a girl walking past to show my technique and control, but she must have seen me. She turned around and kicked me in the stomach. To add insult to injury, her technique was better than mine. FML
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Top comments
RichHurtz 0
Someone taps you so you roundhouse kick them? What are you, an idiot?
rw4rf1s 0
FLAWLESS VICTORY
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Comments (197)
Jamiee69 0
Haha that wasnt very nice! Pee Ess: Im first:D
quent10 0
I had no clue we roundhouse our friends to say hello now ?
ZTB13 4
OP are you ******* Chuck Norris now or something?
QuickSilv3r777 0
road house...
lolfood 24
This went straight to my favorites.
everton99 16
Easily one of the best FMLs I have read.
wanderingidiot 0
so will she make out with you still?
mazuma 0
I don't understand. you give your friends a full power round house kick? if it wasn't full power than it doesn't matter.
LukeeRamljaakk 0
from the girlfriend: Today, I saw my boyfriend and I lightly punched him in the back. thinking he would turn around and kiss me, I smiled. he ended up roundhouse kicking me in the face. I think I'm dating chuck norris. FML
kiwigail 0
best ever
mygreenhoodie 0
if she was dating chuck norris it wouldn't be a FML
markymark1429 8
if she was dating chuck Norris and was kicked by him, she wouldn't be alive to write an Fml
ravirobin 0
sucks for you dude.... guess you are not getting laid for 2 weeks...
coldasfire 23
More like 2 years
sodawater19 0
who the hell do you think you are??? Chuck Norris???
SynfulPinion 6
holy shit, that was funny lol
eaterofpies 0
lmfao that's awesome
rw4rf1s 0
FLAWLESS VICTORY
cpkenn09y 0
you are a true Ninja!! A Ninja, does not take shit from anybody, not even his gf :D Round House Kick to the FACE
_cameronkc_ 17
well actually, OP was hit, so it wouldn't count as a flawless victory :/
Socrates_fml 0
was it at least a good one?
RichHurtz 0
Someone taps you so you roundhouse kick them? What are you, an idiot?
Kgirl2cute 6
^ this
001001001 0
Sounds fake...
blankaex 0
yeah, he said girlfriend not ex
d101_fml 0
Jean-Claude?
Sure_Thing 0
When would a soft punch EVER warrant a roundhouse kick? Why would you ever roundhouse someone? You've clearly been watching WAY too much Walker Texas Ranger... Grow up
damatix 3
hm