Today, I was walking through a crosswalk when a lady in a car looked at me with a horrified expression and then hit her door locks repeatedly. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while I was walking to class, I was hit by a car. The driver stopped to let me cross in front of her, started moving again, hit me, and then yelled at me, saying it was my fault for walking in front of her. FML
Today, as I was walking to my car, I noticed a car with a tail light out. Trying to be a good citizen, I walked up to the driver's side door and said, "Excuse me…" The lady then maced me through the open window. FML
Today, I was driving when a woman started crossing the street against the light at the upcoming intersection, so I slammed on the brakes and stopped short of hitting her. That's when she intentionally jumped onto my car and started screaming that I had "mowed her down". The cops believed her. FML
Today, I was forced to look on in utter horror as an old lady backed out of her parking space, kept going well past the turning point, and slammed straight into my car, putting a dent in the front and shattering the headlights. FML
Today, I was hit by a car speeding through an intersection after the light had already turned red. Still partly blacked out, I crawled onto the sidewalk and I sat down. The woman rolled down her car window and yelled, "Watch where you're going!" as she drove by. FML
Today, while driving home from work, I noticed the driver next to me was happily chatting on her phone. I fucking despise these would-be murderers, so I slammed my horn to signal my disgust. She panicked and swerved straight into my car. FML
Today, I was in a car accident. After screaming at the woman for running into me, I got in my car and drove off. As I was driving away, I was staring her down when I ended up rear-ending the person in front of me. FML
Today, at work, I decided to try and impress this girl walking behind me by holding the door open for her. As she was walking through, I inadvertently pulled the door too hard. It slammed against the wall and ricochet back, hitting her right in the face. FML
Today, an old lady hit me with her car, after which she said, "Oh! Not again!" FML
Today, I was on my way to work behind a very slow car. At a red light, the lady came over and punched me in the face for following her too closely. We are coworkers and our desks are next to each other. FML
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Top comments
JFAW 6
One of those days...
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Did you have a bottle of urine in your hand, by chance? Shame on you, trying to spray people in their cars. "Cleaning windows," riiiight!
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Comments (144)
SqueakyChipmunk 22
**** yeah, you be ballin', foo.
angeluv_2014 22
It's true; one of those excuses to be as weird as you always secretly wish to be. Then, you get to laugh with your friends about it and it's an FML for that lady... You get to be a **** Yeah.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Ayyyeeeee, its yo baby! NOPE! NOPE! NOPE! NOPE! Broken condom style!
HarleeMae 6
Just look at her and creepily bite your lip.. >;D
igese 11
time to shave
buckdharma 38
next time leave the spray bottle of piss home.
The_Big_Boss 20
I would have ran over and pulled on the door handles to scare her hahaha
thecrapblog 8
I would have went up to her knocked on her window and then say “ What you lookin at fool?!?!" Of course when she opened the window... Thecrapblog is out...
CheeseHater 23
A serious question, are you black? I'm not but I know a lot of people who still think that every black person ever will always rob you at first opportunity.
SanaSazi 32
I get that reaction from my own family :-(