Today, I was walking through a crosswalk when a lady in a car looked at me with a horrified expression and then hit her door locks repeatedly. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while I was walking to class, I was hit by a car. The driver stopped to let me cross in front of her, started moving again, hit me, and then yelled at me, saying it was my fault for walking in front of her. FML
Today, as I was walking to my car, I noticed a car with a tail light out. Trying to be a good citizen, I walked up to the driver's side door and said, "Excuse me…" The lady then maced me through the open window. FML
Today, I was driving when a woman started crossing the street against the light at the upcoming intersection, so I slammed on the brakes and stopped short of hitting her. That's when she intentionally jumped onto my car and started screaming that I had "mowed her down". The cops believed her. FML
Today, I was forced to look on in utter horror as an old lady backed out of her parking space, kept going well past the turning point, and slammed straight into my car, putting a dent in the front and shattering the headlights. FML
Today, I was hit by a car speeding through an intersection after the light had already turned red. Still partly blacked out, I crawled onto the sidewalk and I sat down. The woman rolled down her car window and yelled, "Watch where you're going!" as she drove by. FML
Today, while driving home from work, I noticed the driver next to me was happily chatting on her phone. I fucking despise these would-be murderers, so I slammed my horn to signal my disgust. She panicked and swerved straight into my car. FML
Today, I was in a car accident. After screaming at the woman for running into me, I got in my car and drove off. As I was driving away, I was staring her down when I ended up rear-ending the person in front of me. FML
Today, at work, I decided to try and impress this girl walking behind me by holding the door open for her. As she was walking through, I inadvertently pulled the door too hard. It slammed against the wall and ricochet back, hitting her right in the face. FML
Today, an old lady hit me with her car, after which she said, "Oh! Not again!" FML
Today, I was on my way to work behind a very slow car. At a red light, the lady came over and punched me in the face for following her too closely. We are coworkers and our desks are next to each other. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
JFAW 6
One of those days...
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Did you have a bottle of urine in your hand, by chance? Shame on you, trying to spray people in their cars. "Cleaning windows," riiiight!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (144)
newbiehere99 6
*snorts* "Did I do that?"
Inheritance 10
I would've walked right up to her car and check myself out. Then proceed to smile at her and walk away.
newbiehere99 6
Nope nope nope nope nope, no good comment style.
frigginlicia 3
You sound African American.
gracehi 33
Your comment sounds like it will be modded.
frigginlicia 3
But i'm African American! I thought we were allowed to say that =(
olpally 33
Wow, this person just went full retard, never go full retard folks. *jeopardy music plays*
Enslaved 38
Were you wearing a hoodie? Those seems to still scary a lot of people, despite. . .
gracehi 33
Dammit, Enslaved! Why must you leave me in suspense???
Enslaved 38
I was talking about that teen that got shot in FL. ***oh, and it's a hoodie as in jacket not condom. ;) haha
Sir_Swaggington 6
Hoodies are awfully scary. OP was lucky to not be shot by some crazy fat dude.
Pandaman_92 10
Hey now. I believe Noor was just referencing a different FML as if it was the other side of the story. Maybe my sense of humor is out of style but I thought it was a humorous comment none the less.
MandiieePieee 1
She probably was already freaking herself out about something else and she was just on edge. Plus a lot of people get mugged this time of year, so maybe it had more to do with her than with you.
gracehi 33
Your money or your life! ... K, thanks! Merry Christmas!
Dcm210 19
Couldn't think of a clever comment.
KiddNYC1O 22
Absolutely useless... Like mine...
traveler_ghost 12
you should have walked up to her car and ask for a ride
drewflav 17
Should've gone right up to her and waved with a funny grin on your face!