Today, I was spelling T-R-E-A-T to my fiancé so that the dog wouldn't understand what I was talking about. Turns out, neither could my fiancé. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my fiancé and I decided to have a romantic rendezvous on the trampoline in our backyard. Or at least it was romantic, until I accidentally rolled off and all but crushed our dog. FML
Today, I was talking to my boyfriend on the phone. After a short pause I hear him say "I love you." Smiling I say, "I love you too." Then he says, "I was talking to my dog." FML
Today, my fiancé told me it was a mistake to propose to me. FML
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. Thinking I was being cute I spelled out "Marry Me" in alphabet soup, because that's her favorite. She took one look at it and started to laugh. She then began to spell out "no". She still ate the soup. FML
Today, my dog acted out a scene from Disney with me, by causing me and a member of the opposite sex to fall into a river after tangling our legs with the lead. No, it didn't lead to marriage, just me being yelled at. FML
Today, my girlfriend, who is a dog trainer, was telling me all about the techniques she uses at work. I commented on how the dogs must be stupid to fall for such simple tricks, to which she replied, "They worked on you." FML
Today, for the third time, my boyfriend called his dog by my name. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. I had to fart really badly, so thinking that he wouldn't hear me, I did so. He heard me and asked, "Did you fart?" I said "No, it was my dog." I don't have a dog, and he knows this. FML
Today, my boyfriend picked me up bridal-style to carry me to our bed. As he carried me through the bedroom door, the dog ran between his legs and sent us both crashing to the ground. FML
Today, I spilled my guts out to my fiancé about some insecurities I've been having. I then turned to look at him through tears at his expressionless face as he texted someone. FML
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Top comments
SeedlessMe 13
yes. you say the word 'treat' or 'cookie' in my house, you better be prepared with some for the beasts or you get harrassed!
Familia08 0
DUMBASS!
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Comments (103)
Chaotonic 2
Dogs reconize certain words, if they can come when called then they are bound to know that the sounds people make to say "treat" = yummy delicious food to them. Now if only the fiancee would understand what Make me a sammich, woman, meant.
chenoa_fml 0
lol I didn't know someone had already explained the phenomena :)
HeretoBlame 3
your boyfriend must feel like shit for not understanding....
wintamint101 7
we used to hve to do this with our dog but she still understands it
thrillhouse100 0
look on the bright side now you can say things to people in secret..the dog and your fiance wont understand :)
ToNstAAr 8
Lol did you spell it wrong?
knightknight 0
maybe he's dyslexic? you guys are a bunch of mean *****
frankb17 0
haha that stimks
ICuDDy 0
Cool, Ydi For Choosing a Retarded Partner.
autumn16 0
haha your picture is like sayin "**** me" lol juss sayin
LilAfo 4
lol, feelin invited or what? :b
omgtacos 0
43 your cleavage is like saying I am a *****, **** me... Get an appropriate picture
afallingstar 22
he dumb...don't have kids with him...
autumn16 0
so she's a dumb bitch?? lol I bet she's blonde (: just sayin ^_^