Today, I was re-watching my wedding video. As I was walking down the aisle, you could hear my grandfather mutter "Here comes the bride, all fat and wide." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at a wedding. After videotaping the ceremony for a few minutes, my memory was full. I went to delete another video. I accidentally played the loudest video I had. No one was looking at the bride or groom anymore. FML
Today, I got married. My father saw this as a good time to give some solemn, heartfelt advice to my new husband: "That ring gets real heavy fast." I was standing right there. So was my mother. FML
Today, I belched. In the middle of my wedding vows. FML
Today, I got married. I was so nervous right before I said my vows that, in the dead silence, I farted. Loud. My brother showed me afterwards, on tape, over and over and over again. FML
Today, it was my wedding day. I had my butt clenched during the ceremony. I was giving my husband the ring, but dropped it. When I went to retrieve it, I let a huge one rip. My husband yelled, "She likes to eat beans." FML
Today, it was my wedding day, and while I was standing next to my husband in front of all of our guests, I was rocking on my heels because I was nervous. I rocked too far and fell backward. My husband didn't come to help me up. He just said at the top of his lungs, "FAIL!" FML
Today, I sharted during my wedding vows. FML
Today, I went to a wedding with my family. While the maid of honor was giving her non-heartfelt, three sentence speech, my mom and I started talking about how lame her speech was. When I turned around to look at my mom, I saw the camera recording the speech behind her. FML
Today, was my wedding. After eating, I had an urge to fart. I let one rip just before my husband and I were called to do the garter dance. He seductively tried to use his teeth to remove the garter and came out from under my dress dry heaving. I dutch ovened my husband in front of everyone. FML
Today, it was my wedding day. Midway through the ceremony, my grandma, who's tried to ruin every relationship to date, stood up and shouted that "it ain't right", "you're too good for her", and claimed my fiancée has been cheating on me, before she was finally ejected from the building. FML
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Top comments
rubberduckie94 13
Here comes the groom skinny as a broom
TheFamilyElf 17
Grandfathers are the funniest people in the world, hands down. Don't take it seriously, OP. He's most likely kidding. Even if he wasn't, I'm sure you looked stunning.
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Comments (211)
smileycupcake62 4
why is this in the "intimacy" category?
americananarchy 3
First of all.for all you dumbasses, grandfather is a he.not a she. And diet maybe?
bellygirl2000 0
Woooooow
snowwhite92 5
**** heads she says GRANDFATHER
organicanna 6
That sucks. I have to admit I laughed, so I guess I'm going to hell now.
Honda288 2
OP's grandfather and #4 win!
HayJay316 9
i just love how easy it is to troll people in the comments people freak out over stupid shit :)
janro72 10
hey at least she made the dress fit her, not the other way around(:
needsagf14 12
At my teachers wedding he told me his mom whispered to him "you did good" instead of "well" and it was on camera. Not the same
x_Gainer_x 6
Is the glass half empty? or is it half full? Either way..... It's all about perspective. I'd personally leave that in and laugh every time I hear. Why?? Because it would remind me of how much of a better person I am compared to many on this lump called earth !!!