Today, I was pulled over for distracted driving. I'd been eating a donut. Let's just say the officer didn't appreciate being offered one. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I came through a DUI checkpoint. The trooper noticed some donuts I had. He asked, "Are those donuts?" Jokingly, I replied, "Yes. Why? Are you going to confiscate them?" He didn't see the humor and pulled me off to the side to have a team search my truck. FML
Today, I got pulled over by a cop car. As I was fumbling for my license and registration, I handed the officer a half-empty bag of Doritos I’d forgotten was in my glove box. He thought I was trying to bribe him. FML
Today, I got pulled over for distracted driving. Not for cell phone use but for nose picking and inspecting. FML
Today, I got pulled over and ticketed while taking cookies to the local police station. FML
Today, I had to explain to a police officer that I wasn't drunk and had swerved because I was eating pie and almost dropped it. FML
Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML
Today, I got pulled over on the highway for going over the speed limit. The cop seemed nice, and I was sure he'd let me off with a warning, until my husband piped up with, "Didn't think you folks came out this far. What, the donut store got shut down or some shit?" I got the ticket. FML
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I tried to make a joke to ease the tension and said, "I’m just trying to keep up with the traffic!" The officer looked around at the empty road and said, "What traffic? Are you under the influence? HANDS ON THE WHEEL!" It went downhill from there. FML
Today, a policeman pulled me over and proceeded to flirt with me. After I had rejected him, he gave me a ticket for "not paying attention to the road". FML
Today, I held my bag of burger and fries out the window while driving, to preserve that new car smell. Not only did I hit a pothole and lose my lunch, I got pulled over by a cop who suspected I was either littering or tossing drugs when I saw him. FML
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Top comments
mif_fml 27
It only works if you're Gabriel Iglesias and offering a box of Krispy Kreme.
grace31297 14
…does that mean that you donut recommend trying it?
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Comments (125)
nkb94 18
Almost voted you deserved it but I was eating toast while driving to campus this morning and I don't want to be a hypocrite. Sometimes you just have to eat and drive :)
dabears1011234 27
I don't know how that could have been a win on your side.
mercedesm 28
I've never heard of distracted driving from a donut. What kind of reckless driving can come from that?
Ypetrol 11
I would do the same thing
tehdarkness 21
I don't want to live in a world where we are not allowed to eat donuts whilst driving.
worldclassrager 41
I guess he already had is doughnut and didn't want another not a bad idea offering though
ThepurpleCow 19
But I thought cops loved donuts!
ArashiGirl 13
You probably didn't have the good ones with the custard or heaven forbid if you didn't give that guy a chocolate-glaze...
lina21 12
Can't say I would've thought about that either. My dad told a Mexican cop he was swerving because he was eating a taco, no wrapper or other proof immediately available. He still didn't understand why the guy flipped when he told us the story
blondie107 20
Probably because he wanted the whole box