Today, I got pulled over on the highway for going over the speed limit. The cop seemed nice, and I was sure he'd let me off with a warning, until my husband piped up with, "Didn't think you folks came out this far. What, the donut store got shut down or some shit?" I got the ticket. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
It wasn't me, officer
Today, I was pulled over and was given a $300 ticket for going 90mph on a 70mph highway. The cop swore he saw my silver car darting in and out of traffic. A couple of minutes earlier that exact car had passed me while I was following the speed limit. FML
Today, my husband and I were pulled over by a cop. He was still angry from our earlier argument over his constant freeloading, and when the cop told him we'd been doing 75 in a 55, he retorted, "Yeah? I did 75 in your mom last night, fuzzball." One more ticket I have to pay for. FML
Am I being detained?
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I tried to make a joke to ease the tension and said, "I’m just trying to keep up with the traffic!" The officer looked around at the empty road and said, "What traffic? Are you under the influence? HANDS ON THE WHEEL!" It went downhill from there. FML
Today, I got pulled over and ticketed while taking cookies to the local police station. FML
Today, a cop rear-ended me. Then I received a ticket from him for driving too far under the speed limit. We were in a school zone. FML
Today, a policeman pulled me over and proceeded to flirt with me. After I had rejected him, he gave me a ticket for "not paying attention to the road". FML
Today, after giving my husband a ton of crap about the speeding ticket he got last year, I got a speeding ticket. FML
Today, I got pulled over for speeding and got a $200 ticket. After I pulled away, I decided to warn the next car about the cop up ahead by flashing my headlights. The next car was another cop. He didn't appreciate my "help". FML
Shot
Today, while driving home, I saw a cop with a speed gun "hidden" by the side of the road. I went to slow down so the fuck-knob wouldn't be able to ticket me. I then had a brain-fart and floored the gas instead of hitting the brakes. Hello speeding ticket. FML
Today, I was smoking while driving. A cop pulled me over and asked if I knew what I did wrong. I thought he could smell the tobacco, so I decided to just admit it. As it turns out, I was going well over the speed limit. FML
Top comments
BreadstickFTW 7
Next time tell him to shutup before all the stupid comes out.
Palirose 22
I'm sorry, OP. Maybe next time try not to speed or go over the limit. Just pay your ticket before it gets higher.
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Comments (95)
Palirose 22
I'm sorry, OP. Maybe next time try not to speed or go over the limit. Just pay your ticket before it gets higher.
Ambient25 25
OP should have asked for the cop to give her husband the ticket.
Palirose 22
#10 is that even possible? I mean, she could tell her husband to pay it off. But from what it seems he might disagree. Even though it's partially his fault they got the ticket. This is just speculation of course.
KingRay 3
It would've never happened if she was going the speed limit. So in all actuality it's her fault.
ptoka 20
#12, if they're like most married couples they probably share a joint bank account, so they're both paying for it. However, I love how the husband made a scene to teach his wife a lesson (unless the cop specifically said he'd let her off with a warning if her record was clean).
Ambient25 25
#12 It is possible. Considering she was pleasant and apologetic during the ticket the officer was very likely to give her a warning for the speeding. For her husband, the officer could state that he was "interfering with the job and duties of a law enforcement officer". Telling a cop off is protected under the First Amendment, at least a few lawsuits have indicated as such, but it's all based on how the cop takes it. A few overreact and apparently arrest the individual, but all too often they would issue a ticket. If a kid was in the car as well, the cop could ticket him for "contributing to the delinquency of a minor".
ElementaryEdGuy 18
My parents always had split accounts. My mom's account went for things like food, consumable purchases, shelter, clothing, and stuff for me and my sister. My dad's paid his car payment and cigarettes. Believe it or not, they're divorced now.
Eahae3 12
Op you should invest in some duct tape (:
ptoka 20
Well 22, my statement came through experience with my parents and now my older brother, him and his wife formed a joint account recently (a month after their wedding).
JesterJosh 5
"Made a scene to teach his wife a lesson". What kind of idiot takes the husband making fun of the cop as teaching his wife a lesson? I think your infering too much, they both were in the car and therefore both probably aware of what speed they were going. As for the comment the husband was just openning his dumb mouth and now they have to pay the ticket. Who cares who pays- they're married! Joint account or not, consequences affect them both.
Zimmington 21
Yeah, just slap a "Shut the **** up" sticker on your husbands mouth
XxDevilxXGt 26
And people wonder why divorce rates are so high, couples don't even trust each other or have any reasoning skills. Just look at the money. If a couple can't just put all of their money together if they love each other... Then clearly they have some issues with management or are prepared for the relationship to end, even if it's in 10 years. Married or not married, people need to work out those stupid issues and everyone would be happier!
XxDevilxXGt 26
How does having money together take away their rights to things they want? The only thing it's safer or is or a breakup. Living in the same home, eating the same food, paying the same bills, why would they possibly need different accounts? You still have the same amount of money, so putting it all in the same account(or obviously more for organizational purposes or safety if you like) only makes sense. It doesn't stop your mom or dad from occasionally getting what they want as individuals.
BreadstickFTW 7
Next time tell him to shutup before all the stupid comes out.
Kamon97 23
Somebody isn't having sex for a while haha
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Rule #1 for when you get pulled over is: "Shut the **** up". Just ask Chris Rock, he made an advisory video on it.
laden_swallow09 35
No, OP broke rule #1: Obey the Law. Hubby broke #2: Shut the &%$# Up.
SherlockWHolmes 12
And this is why we take the time to ensure we've got a roll of duct tape readily available. I'm sure it would've stopped the stupid.
BntyHntrSeattle 30
Tell your husbabd that cops like McDonalds, not donuts. Some people!! Gosh. -_-'
soccerguy5 6
have you never watched a cartoon or something where the cop is eating always eating donuts?
BntyHntrSeattle 30
It was sarcasm (not sarcasm).
soccerguy5 6
you are terrible at sarcasm
JaegerMayCry 13
What are you talking about? Don't you know that BntyHntrSeatlle is just purely exceptional with sarcasm, in fact I think he is one of the best commenters ever!
154rct 7
What?
foxy_grampa 19
Wow, that's rude and incredibly stupid on his part
Grayness_ 26
If I were her I would have slapped his stupid ass for making such comment. Not all cops are assholes.
Odis12 11
And then comes the domestic assault charge.
soccerguy5 6
your husband sounds nice
jdeezy01 13
Please tell me you were driving cause your husband was completely drunk
TourettesGuyFTW 26
No...she was driving because her husband is 100% moron.
hcollins1 18
I'd make him pay for the ticket. This is a case of think before you speak!
SpicyGazpacho 5
Since they're married, it doesn't really matter who pays the ticket.
Ziggyboo 10
@20 That's not totally true. They could have separate bank accounts for personal spending (many couples do, especially if they both work).
SnowboarderFX 14
Or she should pay for it because she was the one speeding
DocBastard 40
Tell your husband to make an account here and start commenting. His idiotic sense of humour would fit right in.
luckyone365 7
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Just like yours, I suppose.
Sports_guy3 28
#33- Shut up. Doc knows all.
feroxletum 6
Number 49 I think you have some brown stuff on your nose *brushes nose*
TourettesGuyFTW 26
#49 is just trying to reach for that bottle he sees in doc's picture. Psst **it isn't his own pic!**
HoodBoi 7
Husbands, ruining things since 2000 B.C.
anonymous_kenie 7
How far over were you?