Today, I was pulled over for distracted driving. I'd been eating a donut. Let's just say the officer didn't appreciate being offered one. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I came through a DUI checkpoint. The trooper noticed some donuts I had. He asked, "Are those donuts?" Jokingly, I replied, "Yes. Why? Are you going to confiscate them?" He didn't see the humor and pulled me off to the side to have a team search my truck. FML
Today, I got pulled over by a cop car. As I was fumbling for my license and registration, I handed the officer a half-empty bag of Doritos I’d forgotten was in my glove box. He thought I was trying to bribe him. FML
Today, I got pulled over for distracted driving. Not for cell phone use but for nose picking and inspecting. FML
Today, I got pulled over and ticketed while taking cookies to the local police station. FML
Today, I had to explain to a police officer that I wasn't drunk and had swerved because I was eating pie and almost dropped it. FML
Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML
Today, I got pulled over on the highway for going over the speed limit. The cop seemed nice, and I was sure he'd let me off with a warning, until my husband piped up with, "Didn't think you folks came out this far. What, the donut store got shut down or some shit?" I got the ticket. FML
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I tried to make a joke to ease the tension and said, "I’m just trying to keep up with the traffic!" The officer looked around at the empty road and said, "What traffic? Are you under the influence? HANDS ON THE WHEEL!" It went downhill from there. FML
Today, a policeman pulled me over and proceeded to flirt with me. After I had rejected him, he gave me a ticket for "not paying attention to the road". FML
Today, I held my bag of burger and fries out the window while driving, to preserve that new car smell. Not only did I hit a pothole and lose my lunch, I got pulled over by a cop who suspected I was either littering or tossing drugs when I saw him. FML
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Top comments
mif_fml 27
It only works if you're Gabriel Iglesias and offering a box of Krispy Kreme.
grace31297 14
…does that mean that you donut recommend trying it?
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Comments (125)
Kindroth 12
Yeeeeaaahh that wasn't a smart move op :/
grace31297 14
…does that mean that you donut recommend trying it?
tournamentdecide 33
I don't think OP meant it offensively. I think they were just trying to be kind and the cop took it wrong.
LunarServant 10
#33 GOOD SHOW LAD
laladd123 11
Well it your response fits the stereotype of donut loving cops
DeltaDragonxx 20
never seen a cop pass up a donut lol
baseballbv 17
Most people in general wouldn't pass up a donut. They're deliciousness.
amisenho 11
Stereotype or not, I'd be honored if someone offered me a free doughnut, unless it was a half-eaten doughnut that's been on the ground for an hour, being conquered by ants.
DeltaDragonxx 20
although, its kinda a ydi, that is easily taken as a bribe
Turbo_Turtle 14
Or maybe op was trying to be polite and give him a donut since he obviously probably bought a box and the officer may have wanted one. Donuts are good, man.
mif_fml 27
It only works if you're Gabriel Iglesias and offering a box of Krispy Kreme.
Kindroth 12
I'm pretty sure Gabriel Iglesias could get away with anything concerning cops on the road -_-
CobraLazerFace 21
Cause you can smell it!
zBLAKEz 23
"The girls got a ticket, why don't we get one?" "Because they couldn't make me laugh." From now on I'm always going to try and make a cop laugh if one pulls me over.
Enslaved 38
Just imagine laying on that Krispy Kreme conveyor belt getting glazed! :P
VengeanceChicken 12
yeah he has the entire highway patrol on his side!
fortune789 17
#27, Apparently that's how a lot of guys in super cars like Lamborghinis and Ferraris get away with ridiculous speeding tickets.
Garagedwella 26
Oops! Posted this in the wrong place!
VengeanceChicken 12
its a fluffy reference silly
JBChristian 47
#81, I do believe #78 Posted their comment in the wrong place and then edited it upon realizing their mistake.
baseballbv 17
Maybe he already made his donut stop.
Welshite 40
Yeah. He yelled "stop in the name of the law!" That poor donut never stood a chance.
Liiiiiiiiike 15
What?!! COPS LOVE DONUTS!
Incognito_1924 17
Not this one. "I donut want it" he told OP.
SkittlesGoRawr 19
OP should of offered coffee with it! No one wants to eat a pastry without something to wash it down!
Enslaved 38
Cause I'm a crepe. I'm a weirdough. What the hell am I donut here? I donut belong here.
askullnamedbilly 33
Exactly, #22. Your comment does not belong here, since it has nothing whatsoever to do with what #5 posted.
Liiiiiiiiike 15
Especially if there KRYSPE KREME donuts. Man. No one can say no to that.
1two3four5six 23
Please learn how to spell, #53
10splayer 5
How distracted could you really have been..? Or maybe you just have some really eccentric way of eating donuts
OysterPearls 33
Is eating while driving an offense now, too? Honestly, cops are some of the most distracted drivers out there. They have to listen to the radio, respond to calls, use radar, etc. I've seen tons of cops break traffic laws as they attempt to catch people doing the same.
Hiimhaileypotter 53
#65 Eating and driving is actually really dangerous, so yeah, you can get in trouble for it (at least where I live).
False_Stupidity 42
No more distracting than having passengers, maybe those should be banned...
SuperCasual 13
The difference between cops and civilians is that cops are trained professionals, not just some dumb blonde checking her Facebook.
TheMathMajor 26
Eating is definitely more dangerous than having a passenger. It takes your hands off the wheel and your eyes off the road.
greencurtains74 11
right? I can see why eating certain foods can be distracting. for example soup or pasta. but a donut only needs one hand to be eaten anyways
PIBM 6
You need 2 hands AND to look down your food to eat ? Definitely is distracted driving for you! Are you able to sip some water with 1 hand without looking or that also requires such feat ??
gshocker20 21
Why would you say that to the police officer who pulled you over and has the capability to give you a ticket?
rabbi1010 29
Maybe op thought it would get him out of a ticket.
Dummy_Me 4
Clearly you've nvr heard Gabriel Iglesias (FLUFFY)
junkman6 22
Hang on occifer. Hold mah beer.
TShaunik 12
Better than saying the reason you're wearing a surgical mask is because swine flu has been spotted in the area...
boostedc 24
He might have thought you were taking the piss out of him mate (:
TerraShadow 18
I would have taken it. Free food is good food
LittleRed79 39
Perfect...now if you'll just go around this corner there's a nice man in a van who wants to give you some candy!
False_Stupidity 42
What if the OP had only offered the cop their half eaten donut.
Pandaburr1 15
Did you get cited for being under the influence of sugar?