jj4320
United States
Today, I got pulled over for distracted driving. Not for cell phone use but for nose picking and inspecting. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
fatty magoo
Kirkland, United States
Today, I was pulled over for distracted driving. I'd been eating a donut. Let's just say the officer didn't appreciate being offered one. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I was driving to work. I saw a cute boy in the car next to me. To try and look cool, I pretended I was talking on my cell phone. I got pulled over and got a ticket for using my cell phone while driving. FML
notdrivinganytimesoon
Richardson, United States
Today, I got pulled over during my driving test. FML
Anonymous
Maddington, Australia
Detained
Today, I got pulled over for speaking on my phone. I accepted the fine because I was too ashamed to tell the cute officer that I was actually trying to pop a huge pimple on my cheek. FML
lohandork
Roehampton, United Kingdom
Today, a motorist yelled at me for texting and driving. I was too ashamed to admit that I'd been admiring the bogey I'd just picked from my nose. FML
really_now
Reno, United States
Reverse Uno card
Today, I was driving when I noticed that the guy in front was on the phone. I pulled up next to him, pulled out my phone and I made a gesture that he needed to put his phone away. It was a cop. I got a ticket for driving while on my cell phone. FML
airborne
United States
Today, I saw someone drive recklessly as if they were drunk. When I called the cops, I got pulled over by another cop for talking on my cell phone. FML
anon
Washougal, United States
Today, I rear ended a cop while talking on my cell phone. FML
MyCarHasBluetooth
Doncaster, United Kingdom
Mind your own business
Today, while I was driving, a pedestrian gesticulated wildly at me for being on my phone. I was just tucking my hair behind my ear. FML
Ticketshame
Today, I got pulled over for talking on my phone while driving. I'd lost my phone the day before. He didn’t believe me. So, I got a ticket for talking on a phone I can’t even find. FML
Top comments
zukinihudini 0
The police were just being picky
aali12 7
There you learned something today. Don't pick your nose and drive.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (128)
FtGirl17 0
gross!
fthislyfe 22
1: you mean you've never inspected your nose?
ArcadePie 10
Op obviously didn't pick a winner
leprechaun23 15
He nose that he's done it XD LOL GET IT NOSE *starts to cry* oh god I'm so alone
margie2194 12
Let's all admit it. We all pick our noses in private...
DrewsFML 8
'snot cool bro
ThreeSheetsGone 12
That's a booger of a situation. The officer was probably a snotty prick.
zachwass 0
Boogers is your body's natural food. Save the Earth.
christyxbee 15
I think I'm going to be sick.
Jennyboo5797 4
"What's the point of mining for nose gold if I can't share it with the townspeople?!"
madskittlesftw 5
If it was a true winner you'd preserve it and pay the ticket with it. They can't turn down pure gold.
LiveLaughFML 10
up your nose, digging for gold!
worldcupcheer17 0
not saying op is a guy, but 1 in 3 guys pick their nose while driving. just pointing it out there..
legion2020 0
I see what you did there
kwchambers92 10
Not digging for gold, digging for remnants of what OP was putting up there through a straw last night
noobcake111 2
the gold mine is derrin darn good today
MyMilkShake2Yard 0
For personal wealth and.... Satisfaction.
Humanspider 18
It's about time someone told the truth.
cooltatgar 31
lol Where you eating it?
EmyB_fml 8
Hahahahaa ewww
TheTehOhPeh 4
In his car apparently
bowwowpug 0
Pick it and get a ticket
DDomB 0
good point
bellakaykid 6
Did you eat that gold?
ArcadePie 10
I only eat my snot with a pinch of salt, it's disgusting otherwise
GrammarNazzzzzi 6
The best ones are the toasty ones stuck on the walls of your nose
JPChiQYaya 0
75 - That is so gross lmfao
JPChiQYaya 0
why did i get thumbed down? -.-
tmmundy 17
#75..I don't know? I agree though, all this booger eating talk is making me sick.
tmmundy 17
oops! #103
JPChiQYaya 0
lol ^
aali12 7
There you learned something today. Don't pick your nose and drive.
amadais 1
Its the perfect crime
BostonBear 33
you learn something new every day I suppose
tacojauns 45
Do you know why I pulled you over today mam?
qhostred 0
You could have said that there was something in your brain and you were trying to get it out
HowAreYouToday 34
Yea. And then give it back to quostred. He's tires of the empty-headedness
bo1440 3
Dam how far up were you picking and big of a snot was it to distract your driving.... wait second thought I don't wanna know.
zukinihudini 0
The police were just being picky
Googoo27 12
I see what you did there... ;D
bo1440 3
8- I smelled what you did their.
hiyourcute 0
Snot that big of a deal, but clearly you picked the wrong time. Everyone nose the police would rather dig for treasure on the highway than track down dangerous bogeys.
hiyourcute 0
:)
Saltime 0
Come on, 35. Leave some puns for the rest of us...
MagicGiraffe 12
I know she... picked.... all the good ones D:
GrammaticalNazi 2
It's snot too hard to dig for some clever puns, you just have to pick unique ones. Try as I might, I can't figure out a way to use 'mucus' in a pun.
organicmtdew 0
35 wins.
GrammaticalNazi 2
Why were you inspecting them? Were you planning on putting your favorites in a scrap-book?
wisericky 12
*holds fork and knife* Eat it, eat it, eat it!
MatthewHass 4
Hot pic
laceyanneman 7
Hot pic^
Clozzie 0
I want that picture!
jcingram 2
Meanwhile real crime runs rampant