Today, I was out shopping, when I noticed a teenage girl with a double stroller picking up a pack of condoms. I couldn't help but mutter that it was a little late for those. A guy who must have been her boyfriend then stormed over and beat the shit out of me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was buying condoms for my girlfriend and myself. While at the checkout counter, my guy friend sees me, runs to me, puts his arm around me, kisses me on the cheek, then yells "Thank you baby!" There were about twenty people behind me, they all gave me dirty looks. FML
Today, while I was standing in line at the store, some guy insulted the girl in front of me as he walked past. She turned around and socked me in the face. FML
Today, my friend was waiting outside the store while I bought a newspaper. Through the window, I saw two guys getting physical with him, so I went outside and they took off. I muttered, "Yeah, I thought so." They then turned around and beat the crap out of us. FML
Today, I was buying condoms but was a little embarrassed so I went to the self-check. I scanned the condoms, then a magazine and tried to put the condoms under the magazines to hide them. The store guy saw me, thought I was shoplifting and I was kicked out of the store. FML
Today, I was in the 'intimacy' section of Walmart. After grabbing 2 boxes of condoms and a vibrating ring I turn around to see my ex boyfriend's mom. I smile awkwardly and put my head down as I walk away, causing me to colide with his dad and send my 'goodies' all over the floor. FML
Today, a friend asked me if I'd buy him some condoms because he's too shy to buy them himself. I obliged and whilst queuing at the till to buy them I felt someone tap my shoulder. I turned around to see my fiancée glaring at me. We don't use condoms. FML
Today, I found out what it's like to have your boyfriend's mom find your hidden stash of condoms in your car, then spend the next two hours shopping with her. Alone. FML
Today, I was at Target deciding what chap-stick to get when an old lady violently hit me with her umbrella and kept yelling at me saying, "You are too young for this! Think twice!" FML
Today, I walked in on my girlfriend cheating on me. The guy turned around and said, "Sorry, I borrowed your condoms." FML
Today, I was standing in line at the checkout, and my children were arguing with each other. The guy in front of me sighed loudly and told me over his shoulder: "There're these things called condoms, you know." FML
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Top comments
MonsterCommenter 4
You sir, have reached level 99 of Assholishness and YDI.
mpsteve137 15
I wish I could hit YDI twice. Douche.
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Comments (231)
twinny_sc 13
Something like that happened to me in the mall once. I'm 14 years older than my little brother and when I was about 16 we were in the mall and two guys made comments such as "What a *****" and "Bet she doesn't know who the dad is" loud enough for me to hear and it made me cry. Moral of the story, don't assume. She could have just been babysitting younger siblings.
RentaName 15
I guess next time you'll learn to bite your tongue. That's a lot less painful than getting your ass kicked.
b_rad_fml 4
YDI if you couldn't find a way to kick him in the 'nads so they really wouldn't need the condoms.
outoftown 27
You really consider a kick in the genitals a form of birth control? Uh-oh....
mimi809o 21
why the hell would you even say ANYTHING?! that's totally disrespectful to her and her life. YDI x1000000000000
Sheh_fml 25
Idiot. So many other scenarios than her being a teen mom is both possible and plausible. Like the chick babysitting the kids, or that she only looked young. And even if she was the mother, perhaps she only wanted the kids she had and no more. You don't get immune to pregnancies just because you been through one, dumbass, and if she was indeed a mother with young toddler, I bet she don't want more of them.
doglover100 29
It could've been her siblings or she was babysitting.
ObeyStudKing 4
Your a moron. I'm glad he beat the shit out of you. Serves you right for judging someone you don't know.
TurquoiseJesus 15
Assuming you were correct in your assumption of her age, the fyl. Otherwise, you were being a Dick, but you still didn't deserve it. I hate when people, over every little thing, want to fight someone else, like the boyfriend. If you get effected (affected?) so much by a stranger's words that your first thought is to beat the stranger up, well then I don't won't to live on the planet anymore. Well, that compounded with dozens of other facts, like living on another planet would be cool.
Rocky007 15
Some people can't take the truth. Rather than beat you up, the guy should have apologized for molesting the teenager. Hope you sue.
madisonrose626 5
And if those had been her brother/sister she was watching with her boyfriend, how would you've felt?