Today, I was on the London underground reading a newspaper. A huge guy was sitting next to me and there weren't many other people around. As I turned a page, he leaned into me, glaring, and said, "I'm not finished yet". At the next stop I put down the paper and jumped off. It wasn't even my stop. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was quietly reading in the subway, when all of a sudden, at a station, the man sitting next to me stood up, slapped me, yelled "Bitch!", and rushed off the train. FML
Today, while I was on the bus to work, a morbidly obese man sat down next to me. When my stop came and I stood up to get off, he just looked at me, said with a smirk, "good luck with that," and went back to reading his paper. I missed my stop. FML
Today, I was on the subway, when the girl opposite me suddenly started shouting and accusing me of photographing her. I was reading a book on my phone, and I showed her the screen, but I got shoved around anyway by another guy, who threatened to report me for being a pervert. FML
Today, I was reading a newspaper at a bus stop when a creepy guy rested his chin on my shoulder and said, "I miss the good old days, when people would read newspapers together and it wasn't classed as weird." He then walked off. FML
Today, I was on the subway and saw this cute guy eyeing me. I crossed my legs, tossed back my hair, and raised my eyebrows slightly. As he came up to me, my heart started racing until he finally started flirting... with the girl next to me. FML
Today, the subway was extremely crowded and I ended up with my butt in a man's crotch. I kept trying to inch away or turn a different way, but there was no room. He could have turned to face the doors, but didn't. He got an erection. I was on there with him for 20 minutes. FML
Today, I went on a busy train. I packed myself in close to a very good looking woman and, too scared to say anything, looked out the window. After feeling a hand on my ass, I assumed it was her. To not ruin the moment, I didn't look back. After a few stops, I looked back. It was an old man. FML
Today, while on the train to university, I realized it was my stop and quickly stood up to get off. Or I would have, if my leg hadn't gone to sleep and caused me to fall, landing face first into the crotch of the old guy in front of me. FML
Today, I took the subway. The man sitting across from me would not stop staring at my breasts, so when the train came to my stop, I said, "Nothing to see now, asshole." Then I noticed his white walking stick as he got up to get off. He was blind. FML
Today, I was sitting on the bus and as I'm quite short my legs were dangling. Some guy, who wasn't looking where he was going, tripped over my foot and went flying. He and everyone else on the bus glared at me like it was deliberate. The man next to me even changed seats in disgust. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
krundale 6
Poor guy didn't even get to finish reading.
christian1509 21
Leaving before your stop is kind of overdramatic. Couldn't you just have given him the newspaper or something?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (118)
Wizardo 34
Hailing from London I can confirm you get some weirdos and blithering idiots on the tube. Don't worry though all you have to do is stay silent, keep yourself to yourself and give a blistering scowl to anyone trying to be rude or even nice. Its just how it works. In any case should have given the paper to him and stayed on the train, there are always more papers around.
yuzuru_fml 12
drama queen
bombielol 20
you shoulda let him finish:)
Mat2000_1 4
Hilarious. That guy would have to be a hell of a D-bag to do that to ya. Awwwwkwwwaaarddd!
xiiels 1
why would someone be a douchebag for reading over his shoulder? it's not like he was checking out personal text messages on his phone or whatever, reading along used to be perfectly normal.
adair112 15
way to be scared
doodlecloud 27
We have SO. MANY. PAPERS. Weren't they're like 20 others in that carriage alone?
ConstantlyAnna 8
Oh man, I miss the Metro. Such a good read on the tube. I would've waited til you were finished reading until I read it off you though :)
brandoneyez1 25
Good move. People are so crazy and you don't want to end up in a situation. Better safe than sorry.
Goblin182 27
You should have taken your paper with you.
imreallyhighdude 6
U scared bro? And who reads papers anyway!