Anonyme
Aix-en-provence, France
Today, on a train, I nearly choked while sleeping with my mouth wide open. The little old lady sitting opposite me was entertaining herself by throwing little pieces of balled-up tin foil into my mouth. FML
Top comments
Nickb55 16
That could have seruously killed you; what the heck...
JuzReading 23
"She shoots.... and she scores!"
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Comments (118)
Victormoon 14
Haha man I suck OP
extrasnipes 22
do you swallow as well?
Blackhawk706 23
Lawsuit time!!!
SgtAssCheeks 21
@ #44 Your American is showing
Sundevil99 10
Is it bad I know what your profile picture is from?
kjack49044 18
Don't worry, I also know.
NotGabe 28
Well don't leave us others in the dark. Where's it from?
Nickb55 16
That could have seruously killed you; what the heck...
Fmlreadermostly 20
Attempted manslaughter was what I was thinking, too!
RedDevel96 5
guess a lawsuit would foil her plans
Nickb55 16
Yeah I mean a lawsuit would be ALl she could do...
Nickb55 16
Sorry, supposed to be a foil joke. "ALl" was supposed to be shown as "AL", like aluminum.
izzie321 27
The little ones are the worst.
scuccria 12
Plot twist: It was actually radioactive foil. Old people are wicked at times. Who am I kidding. They're always wicked.
NotR3ddy 20
Little old lady strikes again on this episode of FML, old people make for such good stories haha
girlbye23 15
Hasn't this sit taught you not to trust old people by now?
girlbye23 15
*site
barakados 11
A correction got more likes than the actual comment itself? I mean I knew there were grammar nazis on this site but damn...
JuzReading 23
"She shoots.... and she scores!"
shaww 28
And the crowd goes wild!!!
jojimugo 20
While the victim chokes to death !!!!!
AnonymousFunFMLs 18
Haha hope you didn't swallow them
AnonymousFunFMLs 18
Ok I just reread the FML and realized how incredibly stupid my comment was it clearly states that he choked
LCPLStewie 23
just because he choked doesn't exactly mean he swallowed it
VeganVampyre 27
No, it means he started to but it got stuck partway down. Still counts; if he hadn't swallowed anything then he couldn't have choked on anything.
Bloink 25
I thought choking is when you breathe in the object, not half-swallowing it
LCPLStewie 23
I think you're right on that assumption
glabberfasted 16
That's called aspiration, 58.
colton_colton 50
Well throw then right back!
zandalee 20
FML Grannies! THEY ATTACK & THEY ARE EVERYWHERE!!
LCPLStewie 23
Honestly I would of busted up laughing after figuring out a grandma was the one doing it... better a small ball of foil then a sharpie tattoo on your forehead any ways!
R3TROxLOV3 32
Why would something that you could suffocate on be better than something that you could wash off? I'd rather have sharpie that I can was off, than pieces of foil down my throat.
LCPLStewie 23
Practiced in first aid you can dislodge foreign objects in your own throat. A small obviously a little "out there" old lady is trying to tease you and people think it's the worst thing ever. Sorry a penis drawn over my forehead in comparison to choking on a gum wrapper is a little worse... maybe because I have to worry about my appearance in both my jobs I think one over the other, but still.... and sharpie doesn't exactly just wash off
R3TROxLOV3 32
But not everyone is practiced in first aid. Plus, you have no idea where the foil has been and what it's touched. Personally, I'd rather have sharpie that I can wash off, than foreign objects thrown down my throat, but that's just a personal preference. We'll just have to agree to disagree. It does take effort to wash it off, but it eventually does come off. I've found that it comes off relatively easy with hand sanitizer.
LCPLStewie 23
Ya again you have a point and it does make sense. Defiantly boils down to personal preference, and I can respect either take on the situation.
SmuggletheBudgie 15
An internet argument, that ended with no rude remarks and both parties on good terms. I thought i'd never see the day.
LCPLStewie 23
Something stupid like choking on foil or dick sharpie tattoo isn't really worth the argument lol
grunt_fml 17
Apart from choking... There is a thing called "bolus death". Hitting or punching certain areas of the human body can trigger the parasympathetic nervous system. The effect is a fast and sometimes even massive drop of blood pressure and heart rate. It is the same reason why people can actually die by jumping into too cold water without preparation. Young or healthy people usually get over this very fast - usually the sympathetic nervous system kicks in fast and brings your body back to normal. But there are medical conditions, the Guillain–Barré syndrome for example, that keep the sympathetic system from kicking in. Your pharynx and your voicebox contain many nerves and some of them are trigger points for said effect and something throwed into a persons mouth can activate those trigger points, especially when this person sleeps with his/her head leaned backwards. And if now this person suffers from one of the medical conditions mentioned before, he/her can actually die from circulatory collapse. And yes, a piece of balled-up tinfoil could actually have that effect. So no, this is not funny, it is just an example of being incredibly disrespectful toward your fellow men and proof that cute old ladies can behave like total assholes. Honestly, if this would happen to me things would get nasty.
Kevlar_burrito 6
Yes because swallowing balls of metal won't damage anything...it's real painfully obvious you're a jarhead
LCPLStewie 23
Dear Jesus ****! I'm saying that TO ME this was funny and not a big deal... OBVIOUSLY to some people it is more of a problem then to others. I've done stupid shit with my friends/fellow marines just like this so I didn't think it was a huge problem SORRY for voicing an opinion. And go **** your self Kevlar burrito, I'm a reservist I'm only 1/2 jar head lol
LCPLStewie 23
Oh wow, sorry for speaking my opinion on the internet! already had this conversation with some one prior, and your 3 paragraph report is pretty much unneeded.
brandoneyez1 25
I wouldn't sleep on the train. You never know what people will do.
extrasnipes 22
yeah most wouldn't but after a long day at work people can doze off
chutney_02 22
Throw them back at her in ways she'll regret. Or just get her kicked off he train. It's your choice ;)
Baucis 10
Get up and shoot them back at her like watermelon seeds, OP.