Today, I was having a nice dream in which a beautiful butterfly flew by me and got stuck in my hair, fluttering its wings against my neck. Then I woke up and realized the "butterfly" stuck in my hair was actually a giant wood roach. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up to a huge, disgusting bug next to my bed. As I tried to squish it, it suddenly flew off at high speed. Now I'm lying in bed, awake and terrified because I can hear it buzzing around but can't see it anywhere. FML
Today, I woke up with a cockroach in my ear. FML
Today, after going on a fly-killing spree all around my house, I had the most ridiculous nightmare where I was terrorized by a fly that looked like it was having a seizure whenever it was flying. When it landed on my arm, I woke up and felt a strange sensation on my arm. Great, I didn't want to sleep anyway. FML
Today, while I was in the shower, I noticed a short, black hair on my loofah. I ignored it and lathered up my entire body with it. When I put it back down, a roach crawled out of it. What I thought was a black hair was in fact its antenna. FML
Today, I was expecting lizards, spiders, and weird local insects in my hotel room. What I got was a cockroach on my toothbrush. A very tiny cockroach. FML
Today, I had a dream about a giant spider crawling around in my mouth. I woke up to find that dreams sometimes do come true. FML
Today, I woke up to a mouse sitting on my pillow and chewing on my hair. FML
Today, it took a whole half hour of scratching my head before I realized with horror that the weird tickling sensation I'd been feeling was actually a spider crawling around in my hair. FML
Today, I was abruptly woken by a scratching at my butthole that felt like a spider with a million legs. I've never leapt out of bed so fast. When my partner shined a light on the bed, we discovered it was a cockroach. FML
Today, I woke up to a pile of hair on my floor. I looked in the mirror and realized the hair was from my head. I had a dream about cutting my hair and I guess it came true. FML
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Top comments
YacL 15
This FML made me shudder with disgust at the thought of it. I can't stand bugs.
tsim_fml 0
atleast it wasn't goo from your boyfriend's woodroach.
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Comments (124)
blackxlinerxrun 0
this one should definitely not get votes of "you deserve it". no way. I would have been terrified.
muffinkitty 15
I threw up a little reading this.
TheMonica 0
Atleast it wasn'tca centipede... Now those things *really* gross me out. I once woke up with one on my comforter. I wouldn't go back into my room until the entire house was sprayed for bugs. Twice.
ShadowSnipe 0
there's nothing worse to wake up to than morning wood is there
shipoopsii 0
hahahahhajahaajaj
italianbby 11
Ohh yuck, if there is one thing I hate, it's roaches! I'm sorry, FYL.
chimcharx3 15
"such a beautiful butte--- OH GOD HOLY SHIT IT'S A COCKROACH OH **** GET IT OFF"
bibit1990 2
xD that so would have been my reaction!!! while flayling my hands around trying to smack it off but not having the guts to actually touch it..lmao
jellybelliez 0
eeeww spray ur house!! that's nasty..
writergirl23 19
serves u right for being afraid of bugs.
SirEBC 7
IKR! People and their /fears/. PPFFFFFTTTTT.
KaitlynKat 0
One of those was in my hair before, I screamed like a little girl and ran away.
flirtyfaery 7
You ran away from your hair?
rocketeer_97 1
I would scream blood murder if that happened to me. Sorry OP that happened ! FYL !