Today, my boyfriend and I pulled over to have sex in his mother's car. It was going great until I leaned back onto the horn, waking up our whole neighborhood. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in his car. We were in the front seat and I was on top. My ass hit the horn and scared my boyfriend so bad, he jumped, causing me to hit my head so hard that I swear I got a concussion. FML
Today, I farted myself awake, in a car full of my boyfriend's family. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when my dad pulled up to pick me up from his house. My dad beeped his horn and my boyfriend opened his bedroom curtain, knocked on the window, and waved. While he was still inside of me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around in his car when things got hot and heavy and we decided to climb in the back. After we finished we started to put our clothes back just as a someone's brights flooded into the car. It was a cop, and he had been there the entire time. FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I was apparently really loud, because when we finished I heard his mom and grandma sarcastically imitating me outside. FML
Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a make-out session in the backseat of his car, when we heard a voice coming from his pants. Who did he pocket dial? My house. At midnight, when I was supposed to be home. FML
Today, while trying to rouse my sleeping boyfriend for some morning sex, he came. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I let out a moan that can only really be described as sounding like a clown car horn. He ended up laughing so hard that he couldn't continue. FML
Today, my boyfriend crashed his car while I was giving him road head. FML
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Top comments
oliver86 8
Guess you got pretty horny...
allmidnighteyes 11
Rebecca Black sends her sincerest apologies for having occupied the back seat at the time.
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Comments (140)
TheAftermath 0
Sounds like fun.
ImmortalKratos 0
why weren't you in the back seat...ALOT roomier. and if it was only a two seater he should've gone to the passenger side so the steering wheel wouldn't be in the way
IceeCreamm 7
Was it a fun ride?
ShadowSnipe 0
now that's some horny sex
GreenMaze 0
I think turning your car off completely will work out next time.
optimusprime0069 8
34 the car doesnt have to be on to use the horn
boyguydudemalema 0
when your in heat, you dont really think hard, you just go hard or go home. this shiz happens, at least next time we know which seat to have sex in. its a learning experience for everyone!
ienjoithinqs 0
should've took the passenger seat..... :!
quadder 0
you do realize that horns work when the car is shut off right?
womanjesus 0
34 AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA oh lord you're dumb.
chickensaregood 0
wow your dumb
YacL 15
Whoa, 82, calm down.
didijustdie 0
was she calmed up?
jesscarrr 10
yeah try the back seat next time maybsss
baseballstuf52 0
were you horny?
Mattsta123 5
they probably thought it was his mom
EmoBallerina666 0
hey now it's a peep show ;)
jake3292 5
haha bet u went wearing a condom eather
rocketeer_97 1
haha i bet *you *weren't paying attention in english class *either.
boyguydudemalema 0
This isn't grammar class douchebag. People use the letter "u" to shorten the word "you" in text messages. There is nothing wrong with except if you're in an actual grammar class. oh and he did messed up weren't, that was just plain stupid.
SirEBC 7
So much sarcasm at my disposal. So...much....opportunity...... *Explodes*
shannonreneee 11
Hey douchebag, do you know the difference between grammar and spelling?
A7X_LoVeee 10
41 I can see that you didn't get very far in school either.
dmoantwan 0
only dummies defend dummies
Slammediron 0
Hey, dip-shit, do you know the difference between grammar and spelling? Spelling is part of grammar.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
41: "... except if you're in an actual grammar class, or posting on a website that specifically forbids the use of TXT language." Fixed it for you.
Felix_Felicis15 8
Yeah, 41, you need to re-learn how to use commas, semicolons, and periods. To the person above me (sorry, I forgot what number you have), that was an excellent call. :)
NPN_Scorpio 16
The Spelling Flame: first seen in cuneform writing on Mesopotamian clay tablets.
jake3292 5
lol
cheeturtle 0
Well I kind of agree with 41. This site isn't a school or classroom so you can type how you want too. It's not against the sites rules or anything or the law. I'm not trying to be mean, it's just that you don't have to make a correction on every word or sentence. I'm not trying to start anything, I'm just stating my opinion.
1215116a 14
At 104, yes it is against the site rules, you can't use text language. It's on the comment's policy.
Evan2297 0
Yeah, we are not talking bout "u", we are talking about "eather". Now get off FML and study up. Because you really need it.
cheeturtle 0
131- It was both and it could have been a mistake. Not everyones perfect like you.
PSQ91 6
Move along and have fun elsewhere :)
tsim_fml 0
you had sex in the front seat?
allmidnighteyes 11
Rebecca Black sends her sincerest apologies for having occupied the back seat at the time.
dudeitsdanny 10
Exactly my thoughts. I've done it, too, but never on the driver's seat. The passenger's seat is much roomier, if you're gonna do it on the front. Badasses use the hood of the car, though.
jess6blondie9 3
That was an epic win!
boyguydudemalema 0
15, you made my day bruh!
bamxitsxandreaa 8
#15...Rebecca Black couldn't have taken the backseat, she obviously had a seizure and died when she walked into a stadium and couldn't decide on where to ******* sit (:
womanjesus 0
bad joke^
Jenna_Tell_Yuh 0
81... just stop, please
luvppl 6
Danny, I think I love you!!! Your comments are awesome and your profile is amazing!!! I 100% agree with the last part!!!!
luvppl 6
of your profile, lol :)
knightsfb 0
congratulations Danny you now have a stalker!
A4zzzA4 0
Exactly that's why you ALWAYS do it in the backseat.
I'madumbass 19
No. Everyone knows that that's what back seats are for. Shouldn't you know that? Btw, sucks OP.
oliver86 8
Guess you got pretty horny...
SACKERLAND 6
I was thinking the same thing :D
YacL 15
Y' know, I hear the backseat is more spacious.
YouCanHaveACoke 0
Thank you. What's with these recent FMLs with people have sex in the the front seats?
ReneeFlem_Flam 2
I feel your pain this has happened to me before.
pinkp909 8
Good job.