Today, I had to clean my walls with those Mr Clean Magic Sponges because we were having visitors. I got bored and started drawing penises with it because they would leave wet marks. There is nothing magic about how slow they dry when your visitors come an hour early. They saw all ten of them. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my kids decided to draw on the walls with permanent marker, and now my house looks like a modern art exhibit. FML
Today, I found out that a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser will erase the paint right off your wall. FML
Today, I was painting cabinets for the children's area in my church. While painting, I dropped my brush and got black paint on a white part. I tried to wipe it off. Now there's a very visible smudge that looks like a penis. FML
Today, while setting up for a party I was having, I put black lights into our bathroom for the cool bright, neon color you get when you pee. When I turn them on to see where I need to continue cleaning, I see many, small, yellow hand prints on the walls. I have a nine year old brother. FML
Today, on the first day of my nanny job, I wanted to impress my employers with how trustworthy and responsible I am. During the sixty seconds that I went to pee, the two-year-old found a black Sharpie and scribbled all over the wall. Nail polish remover made it ten times worse. FML
Today, I had to clean up after the kid who discovered he could finger paint with his poo. FML
Today, while I was painting, my little nephew came in and started watching me. I left to clean my brushes. When I came back into the room, my nephew had spilled paint all over the carpet making a rainbow. It took me 5 hours to clean it up. FML
Today, my last task for the day as a high school janitor was to power-wash the concrete area where the graduation ceremony will take place. Tired and bored, I drew a huge penis with the power hose. Right before I was going to wash it off, the machine broke. Graduation is tomorrow. FML
Today, I hosted an open house. I forgot about it and arrived as they were leaving. There were dirty dishes and laundry everywhere, and my dildo was on my dresser. FML
Today, I had nothing better to do than make a penis out of silly putty. FML
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Top comments
drano 0
couldn't you just make more wet marks over them after you finished drawing your penises?
Crimson_regret 0
smoooth move. phalic drawings never end well, I've learned that from this website.
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Comments (126)
Crimson_regret 0
smoooth move. phalic drawings never end well, I've learned that from this website.
WORSHIPME 0
lol me too, don't draw penises kids :D
mikakarie 0
Haha what's with this new penis drawing obsession anyway.
FarSide 23
That was gay.
mcdys 0
#34, I know. people are just being gay. Why don't they draw something not gay
EvaXRose 0
Dude! I did that shit too! High FIve for common Idiotism!
Loser390 0
@43, Atleast it wasn't Vegitarian.
chocoLIFE_fml 2
i agree i am sick of those idoits drawing such things :/
ravinderkaler 0
no. gay = bad, vegetarian = good. get your facts straight.
greenltrn2003 0
exaaactly. When will people learn.
NYKnicks36 0
#34 I think it was from Superbad
Trav42 0
agreed with #34... if a girl draws it- it's what they want.....if it's a guy it's what they wish they had lol
PrimeStarscream 30
HAHAHAHA! XD
drano 0
couldn't you just make more wet marks over them after you finished drawing your penises?
crystal_clear 0
My thoughts exactly. Why not just wash the rest of the wall so that it's all one big wet mark? Or you know, paper towel is perdy handy.
A_Guy 0
......................how old are you?
chickenfeetyum 0
ok people, haven't we learned to NOT draw penises every chance we get? Good lord...
clyde_fml 0
hah, i know right?
DangerousBabee 0
God..this is like the 5th penis drawing FML that i've read. come on..if u gonna make fake FMLs at least make then orignial :P YDI.
chloroformxboy 0
why the hell would you draw penises ?
ashole1990 10
the real question is why wouldnt you? its endless entertainment
tweetard 0
It's obvious he's possesed by some kind of dick demon
chloroformxboy 0
yes, but HE's a dude. I mean, wouldn't he at least draw boobs ?
redbluegreen 41
Just because you're male doesn't mean you always like boobs. And isn't it usually men that get caught drawing penises?
fizeau 0
lol superbad!!!
Heaven666 0
>.> idiot...
Roseyro 0
Bahahahah this made me laugh
alexgisforme3 0
LOL thats hilarious
onealhart54 0
I hope you're a woman
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Nah, he's a guy.
niemann2006 0
this sounds just like that one FML with the girl who drew that on the board of the kids she was babysitting... and if it's true, couldn't you just go over them again with the same sponge?
AgentNay 0
What's up with people drawing penises everywhere?! Good lord.