Today, I was driving along when the car in front of me ran over an animal. I only realised this when a chunk of flesh and blood landed on my windscreen. I put my wipers on to get rid of it but instead it got stuck underneath the wipers and smeared all over the screen. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving down the highway, a large bird flew over my car and accidentally dropped the dead animal he was about to have for dinner. It landed on my windshield. FML
Today, I found a dead bird on my windshield. Thinking I was clever, I turned on my windshield wipers to get the bird off. Unfortunately, the dead bird fell through my open window and onto my lap. FML
Today, as I was driving, a bird swooped down, right in front of my car. I didn't have enough time to react, and so I had to listen to my wife cry the rest of the way home. She kept talking about how it bounced off the windshield and how it probably had a family. FML
Today, I got my car cleaned. As I drove home, the passenger of the van in front of me vomited out the window. The vomit sailed back and splattered all over the front of my car. A waste of £10 and a mental image that will never go away. FML
Today, on my way home, a truck driver was speeding next to me and as he passed I saw his truck was the kind that takes livestock to be butchered. I was thinking that I didn’t look to see if there were animals in there. Suddenly, brown items hit my windshield. Yes, it didn’t "hit the fan," it hit my car. FML
Today, I found shit on my windshield. I'm not sure if it is human or animal, but it was conveniently smeared all over and even more was placed under my wipers just in case I used them to clean it up. This isn't the first time, and I have no idea who I could have pissed off. FML
Today, I was driving with my dog. Looking out the half-open window he stepped on the switch, the window went up, causing his head to get stuck. I looked down and he had scared the shit out of himself, all over my shirt. FML
Today, it was nice out, so I drove with my car windows down. I was stopped trying to turn onto a busy highway, when a car turned off the highway right next to me, hit a pothole, and splashed dirty water into my window and into my open mouth. FML
Today, I saw a poor helpless cat in the middle of the road while driving. I pulled over and scooped it in my arms to bring it to safety. Not only did I get mauled and scratched by the cat, my car also wasn't put in park and rolled away hitting a parked car. FML
Today, while driving home I saw a few deer running beside me. I stopped to let them go in front. Instead, one face-plants, ramming into the side of my new car. FML
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Top comments
iAmScrubs 19
It's still good to put on the barbecue and call it steak.
hiyourcute 0
"Look kids, daddy caught dinner!"
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Comments (204)
Crystalosophy 0
I would be traumatized =(
kaka123abc 0
poor you?? poor animal that lost it's life ! D:
tmarie21 0
you deserve it for calling it a "widescreen" that's a kind of tv...not something on yor car! it's called a WIND SHIELD!
yaya0330 0
dayum fyl shit ur life sux right about now
writergirl23 19
FAIL. Get a picture of it and put it on Fail Blog
x3herox3 0
Congrats. Your car has sucessfully aquired squaids.
toyota4life94 6
there is something call washer fluid, ya know?
pdk420 0
since when was it a windscreen?
Crysta_fml 3
s'always a windscreen in the UK.
rozieslothinator 0
y duznt ne 1 know how to spell realiZed? its spelled with a z not an s and I haven't seen an fml that has it spelled correctly
sonic19951 6
you got some demon flesh on your bumper.. oh.. now its onyour screen. you might want to wipe it off... never mind. (see if you know where the first part came from)