Today, I was at a party with my boyfriend meeting all of his friends for the first time. My boyfriend went into the kitchen to get me a drink, and after ten minutes I went looking for him. I discovered his friend holding two melons to his chest, mid explanation on how they look exactly like mine. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I realized I have more in common with a cantaloupe than I do with my boyfriend. FML
Today, as I was walking out of a restaurant with my boyfriend, I saw some guys checking me out. One of them walked up to my boyfriend and said, "Dude, you and your girlfriend have matching moustaches!" FML
Today, I threw a birthday party for my boyfriend. As a joke, my friend and I served him non-alcoholic beer to see how he'd react. After a while, he faked being drunk, using it as an excuse after I caught him making out with one of my so-called "friends". FML
Caught in the act
Today, I went to a party and saw my current boyfriend making out with my ex-boyfriend. FML
Today, I ran into my serious boyfriend of two years at a restaurant. He was sitting with another girl. I went over and asked him who she was. He replied, "Who are you?" Apparently I was the secret girlfriend. FML
Surprise
Today, I went to my boyfriend's work to surprise him. When I got there, I called him on his phone to tell him to turn around. I saw him look at his phone. His co-worker next to him asked who that was. He replied, "Just this fat chick I know." FML
Join the club
Today, I was at dinner with my boyfriend. About 30 minutes into dinner and I see my exes come in, one by one. In the end, they were all sitting at the same table. My boyfriend got up and went to the bathroom. He came back and sat down with them. Apparently my boyfriend went through my phone and called all of them. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's entire extended family at a party. All of them, including his dad, said I looked exactly like his mum. FML
Whoops
Today, I planned a surprise birthday party for my boyfriend. I invited all his friends and made all his favorite food. He was running very late, so I called to ask what was taking so long. His response? He said he was at his house, with the very friends I was standing next to. FML
Classic
Today, my boyfriend introduced me as a friend to one of his friends. FML
Top comments
mewzik 0
that could be seen as complimentary...
jgupta86 0
Why dont you stop being so melon-dramatic! Bahahahaha.... .... ... .... .... ... Im sorry, the temptation was just too much
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (209)
papasloan04 0
Congratulations on having a large rack, hope you use them wisely, and that they may bring great joy to the man you allow to have them ;)
SiLveRStaRLIGHT 0
I wouldn't say your life is ******. You should be proud about having big enough boobs for guys to compare them to melons. Psh, I have a small chest so I would be pleased. I'm probably more the size of an orange. Be proud.
Fsvb 32
@ 40 Yeah.. it's really nice, all the back-pains and guys not taking you seriously or just liking you because of something like that.
ummmmno 0
It's a compliment sweetie, get over it.
BlaqJay9 0
Actually, I'd say this is a YDI. BUT! If it will make you feel better [I know it would make me feel better] you should make a shirt of this "FML" [I'd say, it's more like a MILA] and wear it around. The irony, and the fun of the shirt, would be the fact that it would be covering the "melons" in question here. See? Fun for everyone! Lighten up and have some fun with it!
the_stereotype 0
that's so funny, but i think i'm the few people that actually understand why this is an FML. i guess you'll just have to continue life like you never heard that statement
puddinpowder 0
you're stupid, shut up. This is what all women want to hear. This was just an opportunity to brag about your gigantic breasts. like i said; you're stupid, shut up.
salsa010 0
I understand why she is so upset; no woman wants to hear her boyfriend or his friends making fun of her. I know how appalling it is to be constantly affiliated with the size of your chest. I’m sorry people are so insensitive to your predicament.
ChiliRamen 0
At least they weren't apricots. Or peas.
Emilyinroom483 7
Okay, you have huge boobs. Unless you're fat, which is mentioned nowhere up there, this is not an FML.
TheBrunetteDevil 0
not an fml.
The_Pleb 0
Lol i found it funny how i made such a retarded comment ^^ thank you everyone who corrected me . Hopefully i will know lead a more fulfilling life.
somebodyfireitup 0
hopefully you will now* lead a more fulfilling life.
BlaqJay9 0
Hopefully you will know and lead a more fulfilling life? Or hopefully you will now lead a more fulfilling life? I'm sorry, but you make it so easy....
possumisawesome 0
This FML and all of the grammaticalness made my day.