Today, I started hooking up with a guy I've liked for a while. We got pretty into it and he went into my underwear, looking confused. When I asked him what was wrong, his response was: "I can't find it." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my crush and I were hooking up and as he slipped his hands up my shirt in order to "feel me up" he started rubbing around my whole torso. When I asked him what he was doing, he replied, "Well I was looking for your boobs but… apparently you have none." FML
Today, I was hooking up with a guy I just met. Things were getting hot and heavy and he asked me if I had a condom. I said no, and to which he replied "that's okay, we can just use a sock" and pulled his sock off of his left foot. FML
Today, I was hooking up with a guy for the first time and he told me I was in luck. When I asked why he replied, "I like little boobs." FML
Today, I was trying to be sexy and rub my boyfriend's un-aroused package while we were watching a movie. I couldn't find it. FML
Today, was the first time I had sex with a guy I really like. I took off my shirt and my bra and he said "wow, that's disappointing." FML
Today, I woke up next to my boyfriend of two years. I realized I was going to be late for work, so I asked him to hand me my underwear. I had never seen the underwear he gave me before. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my amazing boyfriend. As we were getting dressed, I realized I had lost my bra. After intense searching I finally found it and put it on. It wasn't mine. FML
Today, I hooked up with a guy. He didn't last 30 seconds before finishing, Then his car wouldn't start. I ended up walking home after a hook up that wasn't worth it. FML
Today, as I was getting dressed after a shower, I spent a good 30 seconds searching for my underwear… which I'd already put on at that point. FML
Today, I went shopping with my boyfriend. He tried on a pair of trousers which didn't fit, so he asked me to change them, so off I went. I returned with another pair for him to try on, found him bent over and blurted out, "What's with the terrible underwear?" I'd entered the wrong changing room. FML
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Top comments
maskedman 9
Apparently he never had the "boys have a penis and girls have a ******" talk with his mommy and daddy.
Rickymonkeypants 0
omg that is the fml of the day
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Comments (244)
pookness 2
He thought you were a dude? :o ...first!
TheUnknown_fml 9
he means what she have too much hair and can't find the hole. stupid.
shadow33456 1
you should of gave him your walking stick to clear out the bushes.
LilDarkAngel9014 2
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
I blame you for not having more sense and cleaning yourself up a bit. Aren't you concerned a little about hygene?
burgerking83 0
32 is win
guckylynn 19
Actually seeing as pubic hair keeps bad bacteria from getting in the ****** I'd say she's being hygenic, however, that doesn't stop me from keeping things clean. If she wants to keep hair she should trim it and shave or wax as well, only leave whatever hair she wants to keep.
malheartsnutmeg 20
42's right about the bacteria and such, but there's no reason to not keep it… "under control".
mattbeverly 0
dnt get lost in the forest
Tripout 0
I agree with 42. but what if she wants to keep it all. like that fml where some chick was asked by her dad to convince her mom to get a Brazilian wax n she yelled that she likes her "FURBALL". what if op likes her furball as well.
dynky 3
42 is correct.
GinandJenkem 0
33 looks like she has some shrubbery.
Cricketiscool 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Yuck no, just shave it all! if you shower, bacteria shouldn't be a problem.
WompWompDub_Step 0
OP. Get yourself a brazillian wax.
miss101 3
one word: shave.
marleytooyou 0
omg he's gay!!!!! he thought u were a dude ahahahahah!!!!!!
DaBesT1 0
Does+that+mean+you+have+a+shaved+pussy%3F
madmonkeykilla 0
was he talkin bout ur pussy or is he gay and thought ur a guy
LilDarkAngel9014 2
#66 That doesn't even make sense idiot. Go look up the definition before you start saying something that doesn't make sense.
LilDarkAngel9014 2
Correction #65
ReyEr9412 0
That's what I thought at first 94.
schnitzel5 0
bring us a shrubry! oh look there's a shrubry! hmmm... what's this, a hole! oh well, NEE!
mfmylifesrsly 30
OP YDI you nasty hairy twat!
paigeatsflesh 11
YDI for having a nasty vaggg girl.
rhythmbandit 0
that's actually a myth. the ****** is self regulating and the fact that you have a ginormous bush down there does not keep "bad" bacteria out. last time I checked men don't have hair down there to keep bacteria out, do they?
vball_luvah 2
113: Monty Python win :) besttt movie ever!
ToastyXD 0
well when I read this I thought he meant he can't find it meaning he couldn't find the penis because he thought she was a guy...
mrFTW 3
paige=sexy
XCaLX_fml 0
it kuld mean she is rele tight how do u know wat he means r u him...didnt thinkso and tight is good
ydiftw 0
Today, I hooked up with some ugly chick to make her feel better. I think I almost did a guy and/or a blue waffle.FML
xxrogerthatxx 19
honestly, when I'm tryna finger females, if they have a lot of hair I have the same problem. I just fiddle around until the finger goes in.
samantha_durano 6
hahaha, "fiddle around."
Austino713 0
how do we know OP isnt an asian did anyone ever think of that?? Hmmm? if so she might have an explanation for having a bush! sidenote: my gf is half korean (its subtle but noticeable) and she keeps it clean down there but some asians dont i know
skillz3333 4
it is because she is so fat and the rolls are disguising it!!
Peacemaker9 7
that's just gross!!!! no guy even me likes a hairy hole to ****!!!! shave that shit!!!!! ******* dumbass
Peacemaker9 7
# 60 hey I remeber that fml lol it made me lmao fir soooo long that it hurt to laugh
jt0070 0
orrrrrr it could jus be the poor guys first time with his hands in a girls pants.... he doesn't exactly know what to feel for
TheMasterWarlock 0
oh wow I love your picture :)
sabatical 0
modern warfare 2 win, tried bf2 yet?
devl24 0
94 lol that's what I thought too!!!
jpest17 5
maybe he was looking for your clit???
iamkirsten 0
lol he was looking for a penius lol hes a fag
zormy007 0
MOM?!?
RufusCade 7
Yup! That's what I think...
narnia14_fml 0
@113 omg rofl XD
Kondustra 8
honestly why do people with such idiotic typing skills come here? for ***** sake man are u 12? no? then dont type like a retard with a brain aneurysm. also, PUNCTUATION ************ EVER HEARD OF IT?!?!!
Thabb 0
Hairy vaginas are disgusting.
Chocolate_Chunk 2
#191, you're full of fail. While I agree with what you're trying to say, you sound like a complete idiot. I mean seriously, berating other people because of their typing skills while you yourself aren't even able to type "you"? Also, your punctuation sucked greasy monkey balls.
dickster 0
Shadow! It's "should have" and use rétard! You use the past participle with "had, has or have"! "Given" you dumbass. LEARN ENGLISH
smart16314 0
what. the. ****.
alizzy 0
#122 same here.
fmlwinnn 0
OMG Monty Python reference ftw!
TheFection 0
that's what I thought!!!
anaiikatoumenos 0
That is not a myth. go ask your doctor. Also, men don't have such a big hole either.
Ysiaddd 0
You* don't* for ****s sake man, are you 12?* Ever heard of punctuation?* Don't cuss. Seems like you're 12 as well.
ccassell 0
Wow ur an idiot. Yes men have hair down there. U seriously must be either 1.)stupid or 2.) 7-10 years old.
apollo16 6
71 so you would rather go to your doctor and have them go up your ****** because it got infected with bacteria than just keep it nice and clean? Sweetheart taking a shower won't keep all bacteria away.
muarif 19
#94 Exactly what I thought at first! Hahaha!
Rickymonkeypants 0
omg that is the fml of the day
Jlevrt 0
*someone's wants a dick*
bihero 0
i laugh at this hahaha
intrcptin46 0
^^ awesome picture :)
razman008 0
looks like skydiving picture
xxxInsanexxx 9
Was he expecting a penis?
nirvanafreak93 0
too muchh pubes fail
angelkissezxox 3
op, if you know your gonna be around the guy you like you should shave! even if your not hanging out with him. Thats nasty.
Pink_Butterflies 0
Ok, seriously now folks. There isn't too many places a ****** can BE. Lots of bush or not, it's still going to be in the same general damn area. The guy is an idiot. F his and her life.
honestlove11 0
maybe she had really big panties :o haha. I kid you :)
iMuffinKat 16
110 and 27, I think the guy was talking about how he couldn't find OP's penis. She doesn't have one, obviously, but this FML is about how he thought she had one.
HaleyQuinn 0
FYL! Hes an idiot!
BrookeTrueblood 0
Yeah, really. Even if the OP had a major bush going on, there aren't many places that hole could be.
AbtractAngela 17
He's probably really inexperienced. The hole is lower than you think.
maskedman 9
Apparently he never had the "boys have a penis and girls have a ******" talk with his mommy and daddy.
K3LS3Yann3 0
kindergarden cop :)
ChocolateTazer 0
maybe eet ees a tumor?
moneypenny_fml 0
it's not a tumor!!!!
Jigga3 21
HAHAHA 37 ftw
pajamurao 0
@37- ftw!! haha!
destradase 0
u guys don't Kno for sure if it's pubs maybe it's just the guy who is a dumbass n a VIRGIN!! evr thought of that?
TheRipper_fml 0
Even if they guy is a virgin, it's not complicated enough to not be able to "find it" once you get into the panties. There is not many places to search. Even if the guy has never even SEEN a ******, how far off can you possibly be with your hand inside her panties? I have a hard time believing somebody can't "find it." He might not know what to do with it, but I call BS on not being able to find something when you only have a few inches to search.
asquithpat 0
OR hes gay and she looks like a man
blank314 0
98 ftw
emilieee_fml 0
mhm, dont you think its wierd you can comment on comments comments?
violetsweety 26
I thought this was what the FML was about. So why is everyone talking about pubic hairs?
beepelati 5
ahahahahaah! get another guy that isn't so stupid! or SHAVE!
filthyfrith 0
Agreed
RaWriTbEkElliE 0
LOL. This made my day.
purplehaze980 0
I think the op Shuld have explained why he couldn't find it , otherwise this fml dosent make sense.
artichokegurl11 0
only lesbians know how to find it... hehe
aardvarkish 17
and professionals
maskedman 9
and gynocologists. they've been trained.
amiemariej 0
lol 35
TheRipper_fml 0
Trust me, I know where to find it and I am no lesbian or professional!
maskedman 9
Well I have a friend that is a professional lesbian gynocologist. She can spot pussy lips from up to 45 yards away.
tayinator 0
so true.
katmandont 0
A lip-reading professional lesbian gynecologist (say that 4 times fast)...
MyStarrz 0
lmaooo 117 FTW!! ...that friend sounds pretty awesome
nirvanafreak93 0
yes shave if he can't find it