Today, in calculus, our substitute teacher told me I was smart. Everybody in the class, including my friends, burst out laughing. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, as I went into my calculus class, the teacher announced that someone had received a negative grade on the test we were getting back. I laughed and said, "Which f*cker managed to get a negative?" Turns out I'm the dumbass. FML
Today, my math TA showed the class how one of her "dumb" students answered a test question. Everyone laughed as she wrote out the students answer, including myself, until I looked down at my answer sheet and saw that I submitted an identical answer. FML
Today, I finally realized how stupid I am, when I answered a question correctly in class and my teacher started clapping and cheering. FML
Today, I went to attend my summer school class again after being out sick for a week. When I said "Here" during roll call, everyone started cheering and clapping. Apparently, my professor has been badmouthing me while I've been absent for pretending to be sick. I'm sure my grade will be fantastic. FML
Today, I was sitting in class when I overheard a group talking about how much they don't like me. When they saw me there, they burst out laughing. FML
Today, during my friend's group's science project presentation, the teacher yelled at me, "Stop making stupid faces at the presenters!" I was smiling. FML
Today, my math teacher raged at a student for eating an apple in class. As he yelled at the student, he slapped the apple out of his hand and right into my face. Everyone laughed, including the teacher. FML
Today, I gathered the courage to participate in a class discussion. My professor laughed at me. FML
Today, I got the best grade in class on my economics midterm. Rather than tell me I did a good job, my professor criticized me in front of everyone about how I was working "too hard". FML
Today, in astronomy class, a kid used Uranus in a hilarious innuendo. I was the only one who laughed. I also happen to be the teacher. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
The teacher said you WERE smart. Not that you ARE smart. If you were smart you'd have been able to tell the difference.
kingdomgirl94 29
Except, you may have noticed, the op didn't directly quote the substitute. Now, because the op is telling a story in the past tense, not only is the open correct in using the word was, but both your attempt to insult op and be funny have severely failed. FYL.
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Comments (80)
Norris_FTW_77 9
Well, at least your day can only get better from there. :)
golden_warrior 23
Why do you think s/he can't land a permanent job? I joke, I joke
raddybear 11
Wow good first comment really took advantage of that one.
MrConcise 35
Wow, nice face, really took advantage of the "ass" portion. Not every first comment has to be comedy gold.
ottokat 15
are we really going to get into the semantics of first comments on FML? all the comments suck.
Robbieisadowg 16
#1 there are a number of things that could happen to OP thats worse. For example, the OP could be hit by a bus.
Sweet_Meli 11
I feel like this would happen to me because im majoring in biology and i dont look "smart". sorry OP, people probably assume your "stupid" because of your appearance. Don't let it get to you ;)
DocBastard 40
The teacher said you WERE smart. Not that you ARE smart. If you were smart you'd have been able to tell the difference.
gc327072 31
You mean if they ARE smart?
kingdomgirl94 29
Except, you may have noticed, the op didn't directly quote the substitute. Now, because the op is telling a story in the past tense, not only is the open correct in using the word was, but both your attempt to insult op and be funny have severely failed. FYL.
kingdomgirl94 29
op*
DocBastard 40
Kingdomgirl - A thousand pardons for my transgression. I can only hope that someday I can find peace despite your accusation of my wretched failure. I was merely making a joke, something I clearly should never have attempted. I cannot bear that shame any longer, so I shall now leave FML, never to comment again.
DocBastard 40
*glares at Baustigt* Yes. Too soon... Um, I mean GOODBYE, CRUEL WORLD! FAREWELL!
Wizardo 34
Awww yiss, my time to shine. I mean you will be sorely missed our legendary compadre, my you be blessed with a thousand successful anal cavity operations and a happy life...
Rainhawk94 27
No
Meettitan 14
Time to commit seppuko, Doc.
Kimmismith 11
Agreed
zango1 15
12 - Technically Docbastard said 'if you were smart' and 'you'd have been'. Both past tense so grammatically correct.
LovelyLace10 3
you have grammar issues as well
Sports_guy3 28
There you go again, DocBastard, making everybody laugh. Including the class.
beautifulsoul89 11
They just hating because the teacher likes you :-P
SmuggletheBudgie 15
one can dream :) oh also what exactly is calculus? cause at my school easy maths was "further maths" and hard maths was "maths methods"
YoureABuzzkill 9
Calculus is this math thing that was created so that while you're sitting on the tree branch watching the boy you just kissed fall to the ground as the sun sets behind you, you can calculate exactly how fast he is falling, and the rate of change of his velocity. You can also calculate how quickly the shadow of the tree is increasing as the angle of elevation of the sun decreases as it sets. Calculus is fun.
SmuggletheBudgie 15
I see... now i'm more confused.
isuckok 11
probably maths methods
YoureABuzzkill 9
It deals with derivatives and tangent lines and rates of change. It's considered to be hard but it's not too bad. A lot of algebra and very mechanical but very applicable math. When asked how calculus will ever help us in life, my teacher demonstrated by having us calculate the velocity of a falling boulder to determine if it would crush the person standing beneath it. Gotta love math.
TwistedCherub1 15
I'd just tell the person under the boulder to move, rather than do the math. Just saying I don't think that's a good example of using calculus in everyday life. Calculating how quickly you must accelerate when the light turns green to make the next light before it turns red, that's good calculus.
SmuggletheBudgie 15
ahhh I see thanks for clearing that up.
YoureABuzzkill 9
Obviously it's not realistic, but it made the class laugh and appealed to this kid's weird sense of humor and it was a good way to remember the process later on for similar problems. I'll remember the boulder falling example much more easily than I would a generic example, like how fast a container's volume is increasing as water is poured into it.
k007dot 10
Dude calculus is hard
then000bster 16
Yeah, a smartASS!! Some people have different ways of thinking and smart might not always mean intelligent.
dhooks111490 8
Um... What??
crackz12 10
lol look in a thesaurus I'm pretty sure smart and intelligent mean the same thing
ImAFaker 29
I don't see "lol" in the thesaurus though.
froggyjade 16
I'd say your teacher is better to make that judgement than people in your class so don't worry!
efettes 19
yea, but it was a substitute teacher and what do they know?
jrock9093 18
Who cares what they think! At least you know you can do what your doing! Witch to tell you the truth my generation didn't know
Welshite 40
?*, you're*, Which*, doesn't*, .* You aren't putting up much of a valid argument for yourself OR your generation.
jrock9093 18
Shut up at least my generation knew how to fight for are nation little girl saying my generation didn't have calculus in school is irrelevant to what your saying so sit back on your wannabe high horse and be quiet
Welshite 40
My feelings, they're hurt. I won't be able to show my face now that I've been called a little girl. Oh, before I forget: our* and you're*. Actually, there are so many errors in your comment that I'm not even going to list them all.
horneyhic 15
Calculus has been an optional in school since the 60s how old are you? Over 70?
jrock9093 18
Wow your a smartass!!! Get a life!
jrock9093 18
And not all states have it in there schools! My high school you only needed to take one math semester to graduate
WompWompWomp123 7
Time to stick out your tongue and say, "ha ha, you're all just jealous".
Jasmeent11 15
A bit late for that don't you think?
rgri 11
Sounds like you're in a class full of jerks.
Playitlovely 13
If your teacher thinks you are amart and your friends laugh, maybe you should act more intelligent around your friends
Dunmerdude 13
If you can't baffle them with your brilliance, stun them with your stupidity
Welshite 40
I stun people with my stupidity all the time. They just stop and stare at me with open mouths whenever I walk past. The military is looking into using me as the next "weapon of the future".
Cartera 10
The government doesn't need you! They'll just hit someone with the cancer satellite, so your services won't be required. Now I'm going to put on my tin foil hat and aim my shotgun at the door whenever the government decides that they're done spying on me through my microwave. TALLY HO