Today, I started hooking up with a guy I've liked for a while. We got pretty into it and he went into my underwear, looking confused. When I asked him what was wrong, his response was: "I can't find it." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my crush and I were hooking up and as he slipped his hands up my shirt in order to "feel me up" he started rubbing around my whole torso. When I asked him what he was doing, he replied, "Well I was looking for your boobs but… apparently you have none." FML
Today, I was hooking up with a guy I just met. Things were getting hot and heavy and he asked me if I had a condom. I said no, and to which he replied "that's okay, we can just use a sock" and pulled his sock off of his left foot. FML
Today, I was hooking up with a guy for the first time and he told me I was in luck. When I asked why he replied, "I like little boobs." FML
Today, I was trying to be sexy and rub my boyfriend's un-aroused package while we were watching a movie. I couldn't find it. FML
Today, was the first time I had sex with a guy I really like. I took off my shirt and my bra and he said "wow, that's disappointing." FML
Today, I woke up next to my boyfriend of two years. I realized I was going to be late for work, so I asked him to hand me my underwear. I had never seen the underwear he gave me before. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my amazing boyfriend. As we were getting dressed, I realized I had lost my bra. After intense searching I finally found it and put it on. It wasn't mine. FML
Today, I hooked up with a guy. He didn't last 30 seconds before finishing, Then his car wouldn't start. I ended up walking home after a hook up that wasn't worth it. FML
Today, as I was getting dressed after a shower, I spent a good 30 seconds searching for my underwear… which I'd already put on at that point. FML
Today, I went shopping with my boyfriend. He tried on a pair of trousers which didn't fit, so he asked me to change them, so off I went. I returned with another pair for him to try on, found him bent over and blurted out, "What's with the terrible underwear?" I'd entered the wrong changing room. FML
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Top comments
maskedman 9
Apparently he never had the "boys have a penis and girls have a ******" talk with his mommy and daddy.
Rickymonkeypants 0
omg that is the fml of the day
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Comments (244)
da94 1
no dumbass!!! god people are stupid. it means he his inexperienced or there is just alot of skin down there. his fault. not yours
chandra05_fml 0
woooooow !
badass20 0
damn girl u need to shave
FockinA 0
op: if you look in a mirror, do you see a man-ish looking woman? yeah, maybe your boyfriend's gay and expected to find "something" down there. imagine his disappointment. oh well. maybe try wearing a skirt, or not wearing a bra?
FAM_fml 0
Big girls need love to. Roll her around in some flour and look for the wet spot!!!!
subarumustang 0
to save the day...you should have then just switched to your oral position...don't act like you haven't before.
fuzz97 23
it would have been funnier if you were the guy and he was the girl.
morgaleigh 6
I agree with 184
gasjockey22 1
After reading the comments, I guess I misread this one. I thought it meant he was gay and thought you were a dude.
RufusCade 7
That is still not clarified. There are three possible scenarios; 1. He's gay and thinks she's a he 2. She's fat 3. She REALLY needs to shave and an outsider 4. He's a total moron
in_strife 0
thats 4 scenarios not 3
Alphonsuuuu 0
The last one was excluded because... C'mon. Who could be THAT stupid?
LynzCatastrophe 0
I'm having a Scary Movie moment here. Sorry hon, how can you not notice how messy and thick you are down there?