Today, I snuck out of my bedroom to go pee very quickly, so I wouldn't wake up my new puppy who doesn't like being away from me. In the 60 seconds it took me to pee, wash my hands and walk back into the room she had pooped, peed, and left potty-paw-prints all over my bed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I left the sliding glass door to our townhouse open because it was such a beautiful day. Our new puppy, whom we have been potty training, peed in the yard and I praised him relentlessly. He then walked inside the house, pooped on the carpet, and ran back outside. FML
Today, I woke up at 5 a.m. to my dog jumping off of my bed. No big deal. I rolled over to the other side of the bed to fall back asleep and my face landed right in a puddle of his pee. I tasted it. FML
Today, my 5 week old puppy decided to sleep between my head and the headboard of my bed. I sneezed and my puppy got so scared it caused him to pee on me. FML
Today, I let my 4-month old puppy sleep with me. She’s been constipated for a while. I woke up to a foul odor in the middle of the night. Turns out she took a massive dump on the bed right by my head. I had to completely strip my bed to go back to sleep. FML
Today, I couldn't sleep. I had to pee really badly but I'm terrified of the dark, so I closed my eyes all the way to the bathroom. On the way, I tripped over my dog and fell face-first into the door frame. He then humped me as my nose bled all over the floor. FML
Today, my 4-month-old puppy made a break for it as soon as I opened the front door. I had to run after her barefoot, in just my dressing gown. It was raining. I fell over, forgot to break my fall and skidded along the unsurfaced road. She came back on her own while I was was laid on the floor. FML
Today, I stepped in dog shit, barefoot, in my own bathroom. The dog had been outside for two hours earlier, and I'd watched him take a dump. Apparently he was saving some for when he got back in the house. FML
Today, I let my dog outside so he could pee. After an hour, I let him back in. He just wanted to come inside to pee on the floor. FML
Today, my dog disappeared for an hour. After I'd called her name repeatedly, she crawled out from under my bed, threw up on my feet, and then happily walked out the room. FML
Today, I brought my new puppy home. I saw her sniffing around, so I took her outside to do her business. She simply played in the grass for ten minutes, so I brought her in. She walked in the door, squatted, and shit. She has diarrhea. This is the fourth time today. FML
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Top comments
ALittleBitCrazy 0
Nice puppy you have
Conkers 0
Maybe she's telling you that you should use your room as a toilet so you don't have to be away from her? Just a thought.
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Comments (102)
LilaBear 2
Why do you let a non-toilet trained dog in the house (let alone your BEDROOM) anyway??
intrepid00 0
YDI for not kennel training and giving in to the dog. Put it in a crate when sleeping and you are not watching. The puppy will whine. Yell at it but whatever you do don't take the puppy out till potty break. Otherwise the puppy is the master and you are the pet.
bingocrystal 0
at least he didn't do that when you were in the bed... yuck
fuzzybear7 0
YDI. I never let my pup sleep with me until I was sure it stopped bed-wetting, and if you know that's going to happen if you leave it alone, take it to the bathroom with you.
Etoile_fml 0
So what about children, and are you going to put those on the barbeque too? And if that's what you think of animals, you must be a reallllyyyy loved person. Very sad. I hereby predict you will continue to live your life in your utter fail. Good day.
oh_the_irony 0
You should have your puppy sleep in a crate. He may cry for a while, but if you keep him around constantly, he will develop separation anxiety and will escalate to much worse.
Taned 0
you can also get a playpen put the bed and a wee wee pad in it I have a 7 month old yorkie I trained him to a pen and wee wee pads he will never mess up his own bed and I feel cruel to leave him in a crate so I don't now even once in a while when he does sleep on the bed he jumps down to go to the bathroom
xfrenchkissx 0
thats why you crate train them at night
gummibehrs 4
I feel your pain, my puppy peed on the couch then tracked it all over my pants. I didn't notice at first because I was very involved in a video game.
dreamer13 0
this is why I prefer cats! lol!