Today, I went over to my friend's house. After knocking on the door, I was greeted by her hairy, 300+ pound father in his underwear. He then hugged me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my new friend and I went out to a concert. When we came back to her house, she ran upstairs and left me alone. Suddenly, a naked man came into my view and I stared at him, horrified. Great way to meet her Dad. FML
Today, the guy I've had a crush on came over to my house. My Dad came in to see how we we're doing, looks at me and says "Man... You've REALLY been puttin' on the pounds!", pokes me in the stomach a few times, and leaves. FML
Today, I was hanging out at a friend's house. Her adorable 5 year-old sister came up, gave me a hug, and said, "You're fat. When are you going home?" FML
Today, I went over to my girlfriend's house. She'd told me not to ring the doorbell and just come in so that I wouldn't wake her dad up. As I walked upstairs, her father walked out of the bathroom naked. We locked eyes. I can't get the image out of my head. FML
Today, my dad invited our very cute neighbor inside to introduce him to me. I was wearing pajamas and hadn't showered in two days due to being extremely sick. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house waiting for him to get out of the shower. Bored, I sent my friend a picture of myself pretending to make out with his bear rug. After the photo shoot, I looked in the doorway to find his dad staring at me. FML
Today, I was meeting my girlfriend's parents for the first time. She warned me they were a little weird. Right when we walked in the door, her parents were there to greet us...in the nude. Apparently this constitutes as a LITTLE weird. They both hugged me. FML
Today, I got a phone call from a friend, who lives in the same neighbourhood as me, wondering if it was my father she saw walking a dog by her house, wearing only his boxers. It was. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to meet his parents. Right when I arrived, his little sister said, "She's a lot fatter than you said!" FML
Today, I finally got up the nerve to invite the guy I like to hang out at my house. It was also the day my mother decided that our house is a "pants optional zone," and that she should implement that policy immediately. While he was at our house. FML
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Top comments
marijuanasmoker4 3
Bear Hug!
jallred254 4
Hopefully you didn't get sucked into one of his rolls.
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Comments (147)
marijuanasmoker4 3
Bear Hug!
overthelimit 3
bare* hug?
iceliebedich 7
I love getting bear hugs from hairy fat dude...NOT I like bear hugs from my bf more:)
Kyzahhh 7
Give the man a break atleast he had underwear on when he kindly greeted you
genesisnirvana 11
Sounds like he likes you.would you prefer a 300+ pounds man hate you? Embrace the hug OP. Embrace it.
L3Paparazzo 7
The friend's dad is cuute
Keyman1212 14
Bet he was sweaty and sticky as well... Yum.
Wtf91101 3
Lucky u if that's the worst thing that ever happens to u. Least he didn't grab ur ass and squeeze!
shannonreneee 11
Maybe he had so much hair that he doesn't need any clothes besides underwear?
MrSassypants 34
52 hopefully it gets to the point he doesn't need underwear. ;)
jake1632 9
Let's hope not mrsassy
FarSide 23
Fat hairy guys give good hug.
feranmi101 0
So so true it's better to be hugged then eaten
tona01 16
You should've sucked the moob
MizzErikaHart 8
Be a good friend and save her the humiliation by not telling her about the incident. I wouldn't anyways.
faithxoxox 1
24 doesn't deserve so many thumbs down. ):
rjonesy1992 0
Saying no offense doesn't take back an insult lol.
duckman9 55
whats cute about a 300+ pounds guy?
eshhayz 0
It could have been worse, he could have shoved his itchy nose into your meaty pussy and proceeded to take a 4.7 second inhale...
FFPulley 9
Heeey Yooouuu Guuuyyyys! Chunk, friend?? *giant hug*
Stonedmanalex 0
At least he wasn't naked wearing a cape
sunrise1234 3
bromance?
Max24KB 0
wtf? lol bitch no one gives a **** about you and your bf hah
Max24KB 0
talking to 24 btw
edendacosta 4
Lol same...
n_epic_fail 14
what is with people hating on fat dudes?! some of them are actually quite sexy ;)
minisquid 9
Was his name Bob, and did he have bitch-****?
benniful 0
how do you expect 54 not to take offense? your not the sharpest crayon there bud. maybe keep it to yourself
shali14 0
that sounds very attractive! not.
flamegrilled123 3
Stfu about my dad
EODTEC 5
You fail at sarcasm/being funny.
lilovatch 4
Wop wop wop wooooooopppppp
k8izgr8_fml 0
that shirt is black not
cupcakeluver1212 0
That's not really funny.......
zachherbert 10
No!!! Three minutes late... Sorry for the repeat
futtbuck101 1
You sound smart. Not!
shali14 0
Wasn't trying to be funny and it's purple dumbass.
Snodes 0
Borat anyone?
Insane_Tea 15
Gtfo. NOT. No really...gtfo.
geocayce 7
Poor humor impaired girl... If it isn't an attempt at sarcasm, are you implying you are attracted to unhealthy and overly obese men?
tiberhit 6
Bear hug?
Gruv3r14 1
What phrase of "bear" do you mean?
btnhdude 0
the guy sounds like a friendly teddy bear, I know right.
TheBeastiest 6
The gravitational pull probably pulled op closer to him and he just embraced him to play it off.
NAU_future 7
37 idk if you are stupid and accidentally clever, or very clever but I see what you did there.
DoubleDose 0
that's to be expected when you deal with fat people. they could maul you with their sweaty bear hug attacks
franceypants 0
FYL!!!
jallred254 4
Hopefully you didn't get sucked into one of his rolls.
musicfreak9821 6
I think I just barfed a little bit...
flockz 20
i think i got turned on a little bit...
CryMoreFMLs 15
No fair, my rolls havent developed that much :( I can only put food and small dogs in them.
hailphire130 0
57-Don't worry. I shall train you. *proceeds with a peaches and cream eating montage* 50 points to whoever knows what show I'm referencing.
hotair10 9
69 - That would be Ed Edd and Eddy
zachherbert 10
Ed Edd and Eddy...
zachherbert 10
Damn three minutes late...
hailphire130 0
Correct!
dukefan302 4
That must have really turned you on
ThatOneCanadian 0
exactly, op should complain. that stuff turns people on sometimes.
khemist_fml 0
what a hairy situation.
Ninja_assassinXD 8
EWwWwWWWWWwWwwwwww
SpaceDementia_fml 4
I second the motion! :P
Majstr 23
It would be worse if he was sweaty. :$
BBGxBlondie 6
Good to know.
iAintEvenMad 0
Warm and sweaty sensation?
PopRocks14 0
Your picture... + the comment..
OrgasmicBunnies 9
That's a huge turn on where I live. It's just more to love Op.
jallred254 4
What the ****?
Mikonam_fml 8
where do you live?
OrgasmicBunnies 9
Indiana neighbor.
CryMoreFMLs 15
Im moving to Indiana!